Wrapped In Your Arms I'm Home
by SheWhoHangsOutALotInCemeteries
Summary: AH: "We've been best friends since we were 6 years old... But I could lose all that if that plane takes off before I can stop her.... before I can tell her how I really feel.... that I'm in love with her."... Yea, I suck at summaries. Just read! lol.
1. Sandbox Love

**OK... so over the week I got the inspiration to try my first story since I love reading them!**

**(Oh and I got the title from the lovely song "Wrapped In Your Arms" by Fireflight... if you haven't heard it you really should give it a listen because its beautiful!)  
**

**All I have so far is this chapter. I _was_ just going to wait and at least get chapter 2 together before I posted this one but I couldn't help myself! I figured I'd see what yall think first... I do have an idea of where the story is going to go so it's not like I'm COMPLETELY lost lol, but I'm not too sure when the next chapter will be up because I'm kinda busy right now. BUT I am going to try my hardest to get it together and up soon!  
**

**So, I hope you enjoy what I have so far =).....**

**(And to be on the safe side I guess I'll mention the fact that Alice, Bella, and basically all the characters(except a few maybe) belong to Stephanie Meyer.... if I DID own them, Alice and Bella would've ended up in a _very_ different way in the books;))**

**Sooo yea I'm going to shut up now and let you read... here it is!....**

We've been friends since we were 6 years old. It's funny how I remember the day we met so clearly.....

***FLASHBACK***

_It was a steamy Summer day(Which was very odd seeing how most Summer days in Forks, Washington are pretty comfortable). The sun was beaming down over the playground. It's hot rays making the metal slides harsh to the touch. So you can bet that the slides went unused that day. Most of the kids were spending their time waiting in line for the swings. Not patiently I might add. Some would get bored just standing and end up running off with their buddies to play tag. But always glancing back at the swings to see if one would happen to be open. Not me though. I sat in the sandbox alone watching the others have fun while sticking my little hands deep into the golden sand and flexing my fingers loving how cool it felt. I looked up at the swing-set to see two blonde girls. One was pushing with a big smile on her face while the other was gripping the chains and kicking her feet back and forth in the air. Laughter getting louder each time she went higher. I couldn't help but smile a little at the sight. Deep down though I was jealous of the two friends. I've never had someone to push me. Never had someone to play with period. I don't know why I was an outcast at the age of 6 but yet her I am, sitting alone. Just me, sand, and a plastic shovel. I looked over my shoulder at my mother, Renee, who was sitting with another mom. I couldn't hear what they were saying over the feet of running children and laughter, but judging by the frantic waving of hands and wide smiles, I could tell the conversation must be a good one. That means we wouldn't be leaving soon. You think my mother would notice that every time we come here she ends up having a better time than me. I look away from them and continue to play with the sand. Hoping that soon it will be time to go..._

_"Hi...", I hear a soft, shy voice say. I look up through the long, dark brown strands of lose hair that escaped from my pony-tail to see .... a girl._

_She's shorter than me and most of the kids here. She has dark hair with a style that would probably make any other girl our age look like a boy. But on her she looked like an adorable pixie. Her big, golden eyes were looking directly at me, but I still look over my shoulder to see if she was talking to someone else. Why would SHE talk to ME? No one ever does! That's why I'm sitting in the sandbox alone.... so she MUST be talking to me..._

_I blushed at how I was acting and the fact that she approached me and quietly said, "Hi..."_

_"Why are you playing by yourself?", She asks with a questioning look._

_I blush more. Maybe since it's so hot she wont notice and think it's just from the sun, "I don't know. I always do."._

_She gives a shy smile and rocks back and forth on her heels at the edge of the sandbox. Kinda like she's waiting for an invitation in. "Can.... can I play with you?". Huh, I guess she was waiting for an invite. I can't help but smile. Someone actually wants to play with me. I smile and nod my head, giving her the okay to step in. She smiles too and steps over the little ledge and walks over and sits down in front of me with her legs tucked underneath her. She places her hands into her lap after making sure her dress is tucked in and continues to smile at me. I just keep smiling back. I look down at what I'm wearing. A plain red tshirt, dirt stained shorts, and untied converses. Then I look back up at her. The dress she's wearing is a green Summer dress that is lovely against her pale skin and her little black dress shoes are complete with bows on the side. She's like a living porcelain, Tinkerbell doll. And without even thinking I ask...._

_"You remind me of Tinkerbell.... are you Tinkerbell?", I instantly turn two shades of red that I know can not be blamed on the sun this time. But instead of looking at me like I'm some kind of freak, she just giggles and says...._

_"No, I'm not Tinkerbell. I'm Alice!.. what's your name?" ..... so her name is Alice. That's a nice name. She looks like an Alice.......and Tinkerbell._

_"Bella..."_

_"Bella." She says testing out the name. I give her a nod not knowing how else to respond. Then she jumps back in with questions..._

_"How old are you?" She asks._

_"Six."_

_"Me too!" she says and her smile gets brighter. I laugh a little at her reaction and tuck the hair thats in my eyes behind my ears. _

_"Is that your mommy?", she points behind me and I look over my shoulder again. She's pointing at Renee who is still having an entertaining conversation with the other woman._

_"Yea..."_

_"Your mommy is talking to my mommy." She says while waving happily over at her mom. Her mom waves back and my mom does the same to me. I just give her a smile and a wave that isn't as enthusiastic as Alice's. But it'll do._

_"Do you wanna make a sand castle?" She asks cheerfully. I answer back with a yes and we start digging into the sand._

_It's funny how when you're young you can become best friends with someone and all you basically know about each other are your names and age. It's like nothing else matters as long as you're having fun with that other person. That's how it was with me and Alice as we sat in the sand talking about random thing while we made our castle. Of course she asked most of the questions but I didn't mind at all. I answered everything she asked and listened to her answers too. I wanted to know everything there is to know about Alice. Because I finally found a friend.... my best friend..._

_No longer will I sit alone in the sandbox wishing that I could leave soon...._

_No longer will I play alone...._

_And now I finally have someone to push me on the swing..._

***END OF FLASHBACK***

_**-12 Years Later. Present time-**_

.............

But I could lose all that if that plane takes off before I can stop her.... before I can tell her how I really feel.... that I'm in love with her.

Yes. My name is Bella Swan and I am in love with my best friend, my partner in crime, my other half, _my everything_.... Alice Cullen.

I've known this for years. It's not like I recently woke up one morning and went, _"Huh... I think Alice is the one."_ Nope. Ever since that day at the playground me and Alice were joined at the hip. People around Forks pretty much knew us as "Bella and Alice" never just "Bella" or "Alice" because where ever one of us were, odds are the other is pretty damn close by. Alice was always the more popular one in school. The one every guy, and hell, most girls wanted to be with. You think someone like that would have a pretty large ego, huh? Well, you're dead wrong. Alice was kind, loving, she put everyone before herself and was always there for anyone who needed her. You couldn't help but want to be around this girl. It's like she has some sort of energy around her that just pulls everyone in and refuses to let go. How can you not fall in love with someone like that? And I'm just... _Bella._ The girl with the beautiful best friend. Don't get me wrong, I'm not bad to look at either. And I'm more outgoing(_thanks to Alice. She really brought me out of my shell over the years) _so it's not like I'm a _total _loser, but it just doesn't make since how someone as amazing as Alice will have anything to do with me... well, they do say sandbox love never dies....

And I'm about to put that to the test... Because I'm pulling into the airport now....

After almost hitting an elderly woman while trying to whip into a parking spot with the rust bucket I call a truck, I turn of the roaring engine, jerk the key out of the ignition, and jump out not even worrying about shutting the door. I've done this many times and I _still_ have it,_"I'll pay someone to take that piece of shit off my hands." _

I sprint to the sliding glass doors of the airport as fast as my legs will go while ignoring the curses coming from the grandma who almost became my new hood ornament. I do _not_ approve running through airport parking lots. It's like suicide. I've almost been hit by two taxis and I tripped over someones luggage as they were pulling it out of their trunk. If this had been any other time I would've said sorry and helped pick their belongings up... and of course apologize to granny. But there's no time for that...

As I get closer and closer to my destination, I glance down at my watch _"Cool, I still have at least 15 minutes left."_ I pick up my pace anyway. I just have to get to her.

I finally barge through the doors of the airport feeling like a track star... now I just need my prize... I take a few seconds to get my breathing under control while I run my fingers through my hair, looking for her...

There's so many people. I didn't even think there could be this many people in Forks without setting off some sort of alarm. Now I'm getting nervous. What if I can't find her? No. I can't think like that. I _will _find her. I pick a direction and start walking. She has to be somewhere.... I mean REALLY, is everyone in this freakin' airport today!? I see an empty bench so I stand on it to get a better view over the sea of people. I get some weird looks but I really don't give a shit right now. I scan the area looking for any sign of her.."_THERE!"_, A petite woman with short, dark hair. I jump from my bench and elbow my way through the crowd to get to her.

But as I get closer she turns to the side... and it's not my pixie. I stop right in my tracks, smile fading. I look down at my feet and close my eyes. Not wanting the tears to spill. _"Maybe this is a sign... maybe I should just go home."_ but before I could make up my mind, something in the pit of my gut told me to open my eyes and look up. So I did as I was told. You never go against your gut...

And that's when my eyes got wide and I forgot how to breathe. There, not to far away from me was an 18 year old petite girl with curves to die for and the face of an angel. Her jet black hair contrasting so nicely with her pale skin. Her intense eyes that I have lost myself in countless times over the years were looking to the floor in deep thought...

It was my Tinkerbell..... my...

"Alice..."

......

**So there's the first chapter! Tell me what ya think!  
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	2. The Night That Changed It All

**Oh WOW... it was such a smurfin' awesome feeling to sign into my email account late last night and see my inbox filled with alerts coming from all of you! Thank you soooo much for the reviews and thank you for putting a smile on my face! Seriously, I didn't expect to get as many comments as I did so THANK YOU! lol. I'm really glad y'all enjoyed the first chapter. The second chapter is being posted a lot quicker than I thought because I wasn't able to sleep last night so I used the time to get it up for you!(**_**I have tried my hardest to avoid saying "get it up" or "**__**getting it up" because I can't help but laugh every time LOL...)**_** I stayed up till like 3 in the morning working on it so I hope it's worthy enough**** for y'all!****...so now I give you the second chapter, enjoy!...**

**Oh, and this is when the 'M' rating kinda comes in a little!...;)  
**

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***FLASHBACK TO THE NIGHT BEFORE***

_"How's this one?", Alice asked me for the 100TH FREAKIN' TIME tonight... she was wearing a pair of dark wash skinny jeans tucked into long black boots(I call them her hooker boots), with a blood red deep-v top underneath her black leather jacket she bought last week and she was doing her best 'Buffy' pose.... she looks beyond sexy... yea. that will NOT work..._

_"Eh, I don't know...", I say as I get up from laying upside down with my head hanging off the bed(She's been trying on clothes for like 2 hours! I figured I try looking at her upside down... ya know, change up the view a bit.. and I gotta say, the view is great...)... I try my hardest not to step on all the clothes she has tossed onto the floor as I make my way to her closet. She watches me with interest as I reach all the way to the back of the closet and pull out an over sized jacket that comes all the way down to her ankles. I hold it up to her(Ya can't see any part of her torso, arms, or legs.... perfect)... "That looks nice- OH! and this will just bring the whole outfit together!", I say with a grin as I make her hold the jacket up to herself so I can reach for the scarf I saw on the bottom of the closet. I wrap it around her neck until it looks like she doesn't even have a neck and then smile down at her...._

_"Are you serious?", she asks as she gives me that, ' What the fuck? ' look with her gorgeous eyes._

_"Of course I am!... I don't want you getting cold.", I answer back with a little smile._

_"I'm sure the leather jacket will keep me warm enough." She says as she starts to fight her way out of the jacket. I try my hardest to hold back the laugh that's trying to escape. "Plus, the club Jasper is taking me to isn't a nun club, Bella" she kicks the jacket into a corner and throws the scarf down on top of it._

_Jasper. God how I hate that bastard. Yea, okay he's handsome, has a great sense of humor and personality, and works hard... but since he has the one thing I want...Alice... he will always be a bastard in my eyes. I can't help it. Just the thought of him touching her makes me want to puke. They've been dating for 4 years and Alice swears up and down that she's still a virgin. I know she's telling the truth, it's just weird that the guy is still with her without getting any... is his dick broke or something? I know most guys would've been gone the first week without getting some. Maybe he just IS a really good guy.......... damn it._

_"Ah, Jasper. How is he? Pretend that I care.", I say as I flop down on to Alice's bed. _

_"He's doing good.", She answers from her bathroom ignoring the tone in my voice. She knows I dislike Jasper with a fierce passion.... I wonder if she knows the reason why. I look at the night stand by her bed and see a picture of me and her at the beach. It was taken last summer. God that was a fun day... well, the sand in our bathing suit bottoms wasn't fun, but everything else was... perfect. In the picture, I'm sitting down with Alice in between my legs, arms wrapped around her in a tight embrace. We had two of the most goofy smiles on our faces because we were sitting right at the waters edge, so when it came rushing up to the shore, we'd get hit by the waves and we laughed every time... Asshole(AKA Jasper) was taking the picture. I looked at the next picture and it was from the same day but of asshole and Alice. Of course I was the one who took that picture. He was trying his hardest to get her to wrap her arms around him but she wouldn't do it. So their picture is just of them with their backs against each other and their arms crossed. I compare the two pictures and smile at how in OUR picture it looks like we're the ones together. I can't help but have a little hope that maybe Alice will open her eyes one day and see that I'm the one for her.. not him.. I hear Alice's feet coming closer to the room so I sit back on the bed with my back against the headboard, trying my best to look all casual..._

_But 'casual' gets replaced with 'almost drooling' when I see what Alice is wearing..._

_She's wearing nothing but a pair of black booty shorts and a pink tank top that stops right at her pierced belly-button..... and since she's facing her dresser I have the perfect view of her PERFECT ass...._

_That's it. She's trying to kill me..._

_"Jasper said he wants to take me out to eat after the club... said he has something important he wants to talk about", she says as she examines her lotions..._

_"Oh... that's...uh....nifty," Did I just say nifty?... I look for something to distract myself with before I make a bigger ass out of myself...and of course at the thought of ass I take another glace at Alice's. Oh god. I start to look faster. I see a magazine on the night stand with our pictures and quickly start flipping through it... what the hell, this magazine makes no sense. It's-... it's upside down...wow. That's embarrassing. I roll my eyes and flip the magazine up right and hide my face behind it..._

_"Yea it's....nifty.", She says. And by the sound of her voice I know she probably raised her eyebrow up at my word usage. I hear the sound of a cap popping open. I guess she finally decided on a lotion, "So, why did you and Edward break up last week? Really?", This is like the 4th time she's asked this question, and again I'm going to give her the same answer I always do, "He just wasn't my type...", and it's not like it's a lie either. He wasn't my type... he had a penis. And I wasn't his... I had a vagina. We both have been friends for a while and he knew that I was a lesbian and I knew he was gay. So we decided to just 'pretend' date because we were sick of being asked why we weren't dating someone. It's not like I'm ashamed of being gay. No, I'm happy with who I am. Edward is the same way. We just weren't ready to come out..._

_Alice knows that there's more to it but she's never pushed the subject. Even though I know she wants to so badly..._

_I can smell the lotion now... Mmmmmm... cherry blossom.... I can't help but take a peak over the magazine... I try my hardest not to make a noise at the sight I see..._

_Alice has her right leg propped up on the end of the bed as she leans over and smooths in the lotion. My eyes roam over every inch of her starting at her foot and working their way up her long smooth leg as her lotion-ed up hands move gently down and up. It's taking everything I have not to reach out and take over the job, my eyes stop for a few seconds at where her thigh and shorts meet. I swallow hard and continue the journey up to her chest. And the way she's leaning over gives me a perfect view down her shirt with the 'Best friend' necklace I got her when we were in the 8th grade(It's a half of a heart with the word 'Best' on it and I have the other half around my neck as well with the word 'Friend'. When I got it I was afraid she would think it was stupid.. but she's never taken it off since) and it's resting perfectly between her cleavage.... and oh fuck she's not wearing a bra.... _

_"Bella?", Her soft voice knocks me out of my trance, magazine falling from my hands in the process..._

_I let out a little squeak that sounded somewhat like a , ' yes?'..._

_"See anything you like?", she teases with a sexy grin. I give a shaky laugh and tuck my hair behind my ears. She laughs a little too and places her lotion back on her dresser. She turns back around to me then slowly walks over to the bed and crawls towards me. Breathe Bella, just breathe you moron. Hey, don't give me a hard time! She looks like a little sex kitten right now so you try remembering how to do basic things like breathing if you were in my position! When she gets about an inch or two from my face, her lotion is filling up my nose and making my head swim, she gives me a little smile, grabs the picture of me and her at the beach I was looking at earlier, and then takes a seat beside me..... oh cool, I'm breathing again._

_I watch as she runs her fingers over the picture and smiles, "That was such a great day..."_

_"Yea, it was", I say as she leans her head on my shoulder. The simplest of things Alice does can bring the biggest smile on my face. I can't help it when I give her a soft kiss on the top of her head. She slowly lifts her head to look at me... great, I forgot how to breathe again... Do they make a 'Breathing For Dummies' book?_

_"Bella, do you know how beautiful you are?"_

_Okay. If someone can get that book to me NOW, that would be great._

_"Only when you__ tell me.", I answer quietly.... but still loud enough so she can hear me._

_And before I know it, her lips are on mine. My eyes widen in shock but then flutter shut. Her lips are so soft against mine. It's like heaven. This is heaven. She pulls away from me and my eyes are still shut. The kiss didn't last that long, but damn it was one hell of a kiss! I finally open my eyes and I see her golden eyes staring at me with as much shock as mine are most likely showing. We just stare at each other. What the hell can you say after something like that?_

_Without breaking our gaze, Alice climbs into my lap and straddles me. She places her arms around my neck and I put my hands on her hips. She's not going anywhere. Remember how I was complaining about not being able to breathe earlier? Well, now I'm breathing way too much and way too loud as Alice leans in and her lips touch mine once again. It's still slow and soft. My lips work and fit with hers perfectly. She runs her hands up my neck and through my long dark hair and gives it a little tug. I moan and start to move my lips faster against hers. I run my tongue over her bottom lip and she allows me entrance. Our tongues battle it out as Alice moans into my mouth and gets another moan out of me. As my hand moves up her back and under her shirt, reality sinks in and I break apart from the kiss..._

_"Alice.. Alice, what are we doing?" I ask breathlessly._

_She leans her forehead against mine and gives my lips a quick peck before answering in her angelic voice, "Just go with it Bella..."_

_I've wanted this for so long. So the doubts in the very back of my mind weren't going to stop me now.. We continue to kiss as I resume trailing my hand along her back. She softly pushes me back on the bed so she's laying on top of me. We break from the kiss again and stare into each others eyes, knowing exactly what's going to happen next. My heart starts to beat fast against my chest. I don't think I've ever been this scared and nervous. I can see the same in her golden eyes. She gives me a soft kiss, silently telling me everything is going to be okay. Alice then sits up and pulls her top over her head and my breath catches in my throat..._

_"You're so beautiful, Alice.", I manage to get out as I stare at her perfect breasts. She gives a shy smile and continues to look down into my eyes. I want so bad to touch her but my hands wont move. As if she senses my nervousness, she takes her hand in mine and brings it up and places it on her stomach. I can feel the cool metal from her piercing against my palm._

_"Please... touch me.. it's okay", she whispers. I swallow hard and with Alice's help, she slowly starts to move my hand up her pale, toned stomach. The closer my hand gets to it's destination, the more my hand starts to tremble. I let out a much needed breath when I outline the half heart of her necklace with my finger and then my hand finally finds one of her breasts. I try so hard to control my breathing... "It's okay..." she softly shakes out once more. I look into her eyes as I give her a soft squeeze. Her eyes instantly close as she lets out a moan. The sight is so beautiful. I gain some confidence as I use my hand to massage her other one. "Bella" she sighs out and places her hands over mine. I'm so fucking turned on right now. She then leans forward and attacks my lips again in a passionate kiss...._

_Now we're both completely naked.... with the exception of our necklaces. Just skin to skin with the sheets over us. Our bodies shaking with first time nerves... nothing but heavy breathing being heard through out the room. We're about to do something we can't take back after it's done... and I can't wait any longer..._

_"I love you, Bella...", She whispers as she looks into my eyes as if she's trying to see her reflection. My heart swells at the words. I reach up and run my shaking fingers through her gorgeous, raven hair...._

_"And I love you, Alice.". It's not like we've never exchanged 'I love yous' before, but this is so different... _

_this is something so much more..._

_And with that, Alice leaned in for another kiss that lead to the best night of my life...._

_The next morning my eyes opened to the sun pouring in brightly through the window. I squinted to see what time it was on the alarm clock sitting beside the bed. 9:34 AM. I smiled brightly at the memory of last night... it was beyond amazing. I stretched my arm out to feel for Alice.... but all I felt were cold empty sheets. I sat up quickly holding the sheet against my nude front, "Alice?"... no answer. Maybe she's in the bathroom. I ran a hand over my head to try my best to smooth out my serious case of bed hair I was rockin'. I sit quietly for a few more minutes, but Alice never came back into the bedroom. I stand up from the bed, wrapping the sheet around my body, and I walk over to the window... Alice's car isn't in the drive way. I start to get a little upset. Why would she just leave me here? I bend over and pick my jeans up out the floor and get my phone out of the pocket and dial Alice's number. Once it starts to ring, I hear ringing coming from inside the room... And there on the dresser is Alice's phone. I hang my phone up and walk over to hers and that's when I notice that there are 11 missed calls from Jasper.... Alice was suppose to have a date with him last night and she missed it because.... we made love.... Usually I would be doing some kind of goofy ass dance because that douche got stood up, but the fact that Alice is gone and left her phone... and me, with no explanation is really worrying me..._

_I quickly start collecting my clothes off the floor and put them on while I dial Esme's number. She's at work now, but I'm sure she wont mind..._

_"Hey, Esme.. It's Bella. Do you happen to know where Alice went this morning? Yea, I uh.. slept over last night. What? Why is she at the airport?! Well, when does her plane leave?...Okay. No, no I'm fine. I have to go..." I hung up with Esme, put my last shoe on, ran out the bedroom door, through the rest of the house, ignoring Emmett's hello from the kitchen, out the front door, and into my truck taking off for the airport..._

***PRESENT TIME***

"Alice...", I breathe out, heart racing. "Alice!" I say louder as I make my way over to her. She looks up at the sound of her name and then looks away when she sees me. Ouch. That hurt. Why would she do that?

We're now standing face to face but with enough space between us so we're not crowding each other...

"Alice... what's going on?", She still wont look me in the eye. I angle my head a little to see if I can catch her eye... nothing. "You never mentioned last night you were leaving Forks." She flinched when I said 'last night'.... oh god... what did I do. She still doesn't look like she's going to say anything, so I keep talking.

"Look, Alice.. about-"

"Jasper asked me to go with him to LA..."

What?! WHAT?! No... no, no, no NO this can't be happening!

"He got a job offer from his uncle over there... Bella it's a great job. He can't pass it up.", She said looking over her shoulder at Jasper who was standing a good ways away... I guess giving us a little privacy to talk.... did I mention how much I hate this fucker?

"Ooookay... I still don't see why this requires _you_ to be there.", I tell her with a look on my face like I'm trying to figure out why she'd want to go with him...

"He asked me to marry him... that was what he was wanting to ask me last night when we went out..... but I never showed up.", She tells me quietly, still not looking at me in the eye... her focus is on the floor in front of my feet.

Oh... my.... GOD... do you hate me THAT much, God?. Please no... just, no.

"Well, tell him no!", I say like it's just that simple. My anger and frustration is coming out through my words now and she takes a little step back. She walks over to Jasper and whispers something in his ear. He nods his head okay and walks off leaving the area completely...

"Alice, this is fucking insane! You're 18 years old! Please... don't... don't do this!", I'm trying my hardest to keep the tears in but it's starting to get harder, and harder every second.

"I said yes...", The voice she's talking in is like she's half robot... hell, her whole body language is robotic...

"This isn't you Alice! You don't WANT this!", I walk over to her and put her hands in mine, holding them tightly... she's still avoiding my gaze., "Look, last night was the most AMAZING night of my whole life... Last night I gave you my mind, BODY, and soul!... I don't regret one thing. I-"

"But I do... Bella", She said finally looking at me in the eyes.. .she has so much pain in her eyes and I can't take it. I see tears forming and that's when my own dam breaks and the tears I've been holding in start to fall. I drop her hands and they swing to her side...

"Wh...what?", I'm speaking barley above a whisper. "Alice, you don't mean that...."

"I do.." Her eyes drop back to the floor.

I can feel my heart beginning to break apart and fall to the floor in a million tiny pieces. I look up to see that Jasper has returned, standing with his arms behind his back in the place he was standing earlier... I have never wanted to punch my fist through his face as much as I do now.

"I... I have to go now, Bella." I can tell she's trying her hardest to hold herself together. She's trying to be strong but like me, the attempt is coming up short. I look at her and notice that her necklace is still around her neck. I reach up instinctively and hold on to the heart around my neck and give it a squeeze as the tears start flowing soundlessly. She looks into my eyes and I have never seen her eyes filled with this much sadness. It hurts so much. She turns to walk off but I grab her arm, "No. No you're... you're not leaving! I know you don't want this!" I'm getting desperate now and I notice that people are watching us like it's some damn movie with pity in their eyes. They've probably been watching this whole time....

"Bella, don't", She holds up a shaking hand to stop the words from coming out of my mouth...

"Please... just let me go Bella." She whimpers out and shakes my grip off of her....

I fall to my knees on the airport floor and cry my broken heart out as she walks away from me over to Jasper...

And just like that... my everything, my best friend... my love, walked away and out of my life without a single look back.....

..........

**Sooooo there's chapter 2! I really hope you like it because I enjoyed writing this one a lot.**

**And don't worry, Alice and Bella WILL be reunited! =)**

**So don't shoot me yet! LOL.**

**I'm going to stay with my best friend for the next couple nights so I wont be able to work on chapter 3 till I get back, but I promise to be thinking really hard on what I'm going to put in it!**

**Again, thank you so much for reading and let me know what ya think xxx**


	3. Party Plans and A Special Guest?

**Wow... just wow. Y'all are too kind. I am so glad all of you are loving my story**! **The reviews are great and I'm glad the last chapter really got to some of you haha cause that's what I was shooting for =p. It makes me feel really good that it touched you! And some comments were made that you hope Bella doesn't forgive Alice like nothing happened DON'T WORRY! I have no intention of doing that! =) If I did, it would just ruin everything.**

**Thank you so very much for all the awesome reviews! A kiss from me to all of you! haha  
**

**Like I promised, I thought about how I was going to put the 3rd chapter together while I was with my BFF, so here it is!**

**Oh! And a new character(Ashley Davis) is introduced in this chapter and for some reason, I think of Emma Watson when I write about her. So you can use her as an idea of what Ashley looks like =D**

..........

***5 YEARS LATER***

They say time heals everything..... I say that's bull shit.

It's been 5 years since Alice left me alone and broken on that filthy airport floor. She walked away and left with that... that, that... I can't even come up with a word horrible enough to sum Jasper up. People say I over react when it comes to him, but they just don't understand and they never will. Sure on the surface he seems like a great guy that any girl would love to be with... but I just can't shake the feeling that underneath all that, something isn't right. I feel it in the pit of my gut every time I'm around him... who knows though, maybe my love for Alice blinded my judgment...

You might be wondering if me and Alice have been in contact over the years.... we haven't. And trust me when I say that I have tried my hardest to hear her voice...

For the first half of the first year, I called her every day and I _mean _every day. I left voice messages on her phone, praying that she would return one of them... no. Every phone call went unturned, every text message was left without a response... I even asked Jasper's sister, Rosalie, for their address so I could send her letters, and everyday my mailbox was empty.. except for the bills that always managed to find their way in the box...

Words can not describe the emotional pain that I went through and am still going through. It was like when Alice left me, she took half of me with her and no matter what, I will _never_ get it back... I wonder if she's hurting even a little bit. She _has_ to be. I saw it in her eyes that day at the airport... I honestly think she knew by going with Jasper, she was making a mistake. I could be wrong though.... I wonder if she thinks of me everyday like I think about her... I wonder if I even show up on her radar still... every morning Alice is the first thought that crosses my mind before I wake, and every night her face is all I see when I close my eyes.... She's haunting me. Sometimes, I hate it. I hate how I can be fine one second, and then the next I'm crying my eyes out knowing that I will never be able to hear her laugh, or hold her hand, or stare into her eyes, or touch her, or kiss her, or just be able to sit down and talk about nothing with my _best friend_..... but then I know that without the memories lurking, I wouldn't be able to get out of bed in the mornings... so in a way I'm thankful for them. The pain just comes with it... the pain is too much though.. it's almost like shes dead... and in a way, she kinda is... because she's no longer in my life. She's no longer my sun....

But I knew I had to get my life together... I couldn't let the pain win. So when I turned 20, I decided to give college a try... lets just say college wasn't my thing. I ended up dropping out... but not before I met someone...

Yes. _I_ met someone. Crazy, huh? Her name is Ashley Davis and she moved from London to Forks 3 years ago. Why out of all the places in the US she picked Forks? I have no idea but I'm so glad she did... I guess it was just meant to be. I sat by her in my English class and we hit it off pretty fast and became instant friends. She was a breath of fresh air, and that's what I needed. But then one night when we went to see a movie, she made a move and kissed me.. and I kissed back, but then I stopped it. It was just too much. I told her that I was hurt very badly in the past by someone I held close to my heart(I didn't go into details.. meaning that I didn't tell her about how I slept with my best friend and then she ran off to LA to marry a douche bag) and that I wasn't good enough for her... But she is a very persistent girl and we've been dating for 2 years.

And Ashley actually makes me happy. She's beautiful, funny, intelligent... and even with all my baggage she still cares and wants to be with me. I care about her a lot too. When I'm with her, it's like the pain is put on the back burner and I don't feel it as much. It was a tough job but she was able to break down parts of the walls that I have built around my heart over the past 5 years, and she's slowly warming it up....

Deep down though I know it's not enough... I can fool Ashley, I can fool my friends and family... but I can't fool myself. Alice still has a tight grip on my heart and she wont let go... I know it's stupid. I know I should just put my past with Alice behind me and move on completely... but I just can't let go of that little flame of hope that one day she'll come back..... Sandbox love never dies....

..................

Right now I'm on my way to the Cullen house to talk about my birthday plans.... that's a talk I am so looking forward to... and if you couldn't tell that was me being sarcastic. I told everyone I didn't want to have some big party. I got over big celebrations of my birthday back when I turned 21 and I was thrown out of the club.. and when I say I was _thrown_ out of the club, I don't mean I was escorted out, I was literally _thrown _out the fucking place. Me and alcohol just don't mix. Which is pretty funny since I've been bartending at a night club for about a year now. Trust me, I've been tempted to sneak a few shots but it's not worth it in the end... when Alice left I was hittin' the bottles pretty hard and it took a lot of will power to pull myself away from all of that, but thanks to Ashley I was able to stop... she pretty much saved me. But hell, bartending is a blast! I bring home some hellacious tips on busy nights. Like last Friday at the end of my shift I counted up 400 dollars. It pays well to be hot and able to mix drinks!

I turn into the familiar driveway that leads to the big, beautiful house I have spent pretty much 70% of my life at and park 'the Beast'(yup, that's the name for my truck. I think it fits quite nicely) off to the side. I see Rosalie's car parked by Emmett's truck, and Edward's car is where Carlisle's car would be if he wasn't at work. Esme is missing too. She must be out shopping since its her day off. So it looks like everyone is pretty much here except for Ashley. She had to go to the college earlier today to take a makeup test but she said she was going to stop by afterwards. I was afraid that my friends wouldn't accept her into our tight little group, but she ended up fitting in perfectly and they all love her. I get out of the truck and shut the door, but of course it doesn't stay closed so I use my foot to push it shut. But OF COURSE the impact of the door shutting caused the passenger door to swing open. "You piece of fucking shit...", I mumble as I stomp over to the passenger side and slam it shut. I wait a second to see if anything else wants to pop open. Everything stays where it's suppose to so I throw my arms up in victory and walk over to the house. When I look up from my feet, an image of Alice skipping out the front door with a big, sparkling smile to greet me flashes through my mind.... I can feel that sharp pain starting to creep over me, but it fades away. It's getting a little easier to fight away the hurt...

"No, it wasn't thunder, it was just Bella fighting with her truck!", I hear Emmett call out to everyone in the house as he walks out the door. He gives me a big smile and runs over to me, pulling me into a bear hug. "Hot damn Bella it's good to see you!."

"You saw me the other night, Emmett.", I mumble into his muscular shoulder, "Okay, oxygen becoming an issue!"

He lets out a laugh and releases me. I smile up at him while smoothing out my clothes and hair.

"Yea, well, the other night is still way too long ago!", he answers sincerely with another warming smile. He reminds me so much of Alice right now...

"I'm sorry I made you wait 3 whole days to see me again. How did you even survive?", I tell him jokingly.

"Ya know, I'm pretty sure those hobos that sleep behind the Burger King would love to take your truck off your hands." He points over to the beast. He just loves to poke fun at my truck every chance he gets... I already know it's shit on four wheels, yet he feels the need to remind me.

"Ha haaaa, no they wont. I've already tried." I tell him with a dry laugh as I make my way inside.

"Man that's sad.", He laughs out, following behind me.

As I step inside, I notice my friends are relaxing in the living room. Rosalie is sitting on the couch with her legs crossed, cell phone in hand texting away. Her long beautiful blonde hair framing her face as she stares down at the screen. Edward is standing up in the middle of the room with a plastic guitar hanging over his shoulder. I guess him and Emmett were playing 'Rock Band' because the drum set is sitting in front of the other couch.

"Edward you look just like a rock star with your little guitar."

At the sound of my voice Rosalie and Edward look up, smiles on their faces.

"No one can play a plastic guitar with buttons for strings like me." Edward says while moving his fingers over said buttons rockin' out to a solo only _he_ can hear.

"Ha, yea if that was the case we'd actually make it through a whole song without getting booed off stage." Emmett points out while walking over and standing behind me.

"Well if _someone_ had a little rhythm maybe I wouldn't get so distracted, seriously dude, your drumming sounds like Bella's truck." Edward says while trying to hold in a laugh. Does EVERYONE have to make a comment? I glare over at him while Rosalie snorts out a giggle, "It's true, babe. You're a hot mess on the drums."

Emmett looks to his feet, blush covering his cheeks but even he's trying not to laugh.

"It doesn't matter anyway, because we all know I can kick everyone of your asses." I state with a cocky grin.

"Which is why you're not allowed to play anymore." Edward and Emmett point out in unison. I let out a laugh and walk over to sit by Rosalie. They're two very sore losers.

"Plus, it's not really fair cause you play real guitar." Emmett says while turning off the game and then throwing himself on the couch.

"Just let it go, bud.", my grin is still intact.

"Yea _please_", Rosalie says with an eye roll. She knows how long these conversations can go so it's best to end them as soon as possible, "We need to start throwing out ideas for Bella's party."

Aaaaaaand the grin is gone.

"Strip club!", Emmett yells out with a smile of his own. But it quickly fades at the sight of Rosalie's glare. "IIIIIII meeeeeeeaaaan NO strip club." Emmett corrects while pointing a finger at all of us.

Damn. That really wasn't a bad idea. But I'm sure Ashley would be glaring right along with Rosalie. That reminds me, "Should we wait for Ashley before we make plans?"

"No, she said just to go ahead because she's on her way here." So that's who Rosalie was texting.

Ashley and Rosalie have became really close friends so it's not odd that they're texting each other but I still get a little jealous. I can't help it, jealousy is one of my flaws.

"We were making plans to go shopping this week." Rosalie adds noticing the look on my face.... another flaw, whenever I'm jealous it's pretty much written in big, bold letters with a red sharpie all over my face. I know Rosalie isn't trying to seduce my girlfriend, but I'm still glad she lets me know what they're talking about.

"Oh cool, you know I don't march in the 'I love shopping parade' so I'm glad you're taking her.", I take that back. I like shopping when Ashley models sexy outfits for me and then we end up making out in the dressing room.... that's when I _love_ shopping. Great. Now I'm thinking about last Tuesday when I had Ashley up against the dressing room wall in Victoria Secret. A big smirk takes over my face and good thing it went unnoticed. Everyone is busy talking about a location for my party still.

"Seriously guys, we don't have to do anything over the top. We can just have a Buffy marathon at my place and eat our weight in pizza." I can see by the look on their faces that they're all thinking very seriously on the offer. That's one of the many reasons we're all very close friends, we're all obsessed with Buffy.... and big fans of pizza.

"NononononononoNO, as good as that sounds, we MUST celebrate the birth of the Bella and in a big way!", Emmett says while using his hands to show how big he really means. "It's you're 23rd!". I guess to him that's a big deal.

"Fine. Then we can have it at the Inferno. That's as big as we're getting.", the Inferno is the club I bartend at. Edward pulls Rosalie and Emmett into a huddle as they talk it out. I raise my eyebrow at them and shake my head a little. They can be such dorks... but they're my dorks.

"We agree that the Inferno is a good enough place to get our party on.", Edward decides in his 'serious voice'

"Plus since you work there we might get free drinks.", Emmett adds with a big smile.

"Okay, ONE, Edward.." I point to him, "Don't ever say 'get our party on' EVER again... ever." Rosalie and Emmett giggle while Edward rolls his eyes.

"And two.." I continue, "I seriously doubt we're going to get free drinks out of my boss. He's a tight ass."

"Doesn't matter. We have plenty of money anyway for a few rounds.", Rosalie says while standing up, "Oh...um... I need to make a quick phone call." She then walks off to the other room while dialing her phone. Who the hell is she calling? Everyone is here. Except for Ashley. But as soon as the thought goes through my mind Ashley walks through the front door. She looks so cute with her school bag thrown over her shoulder while holding a sheet of paper against her chest... makes me wanna play 'Teacher, what can I do to get an A?'. Judging by the proud smile on her face she already got an A...

"Hey, baby", I walk over and pull her into a sweet kiss.

"I got an A on my makeup test!" she exclaims when we break from the kiss, turning the paper she was holding against her to reveal an 'A' written in bold letters on the corner of the page.

"That's awesome!...... you didn't fuck the teacher did you?", I ask with a questioning look, thinking about the thought I had earlier.

"What?", she asks, wide eyed. Her accent making all of it even more adorable.

"Nothing. Forget it." I say with a laugh. She smiles at me and shakes her head.

"No. This 'A' was earned from all those nights of studying I did."

"Oh yea, I remember. All those sexless nights." I rub my hands up and down her arms with a sexy smirk on my face.

"I guess I'll have to make it up to you on your birthday night" She whispers with a sexy smile of her own while leaning closer into me and placing a soft kiss on my lips. "Oh, have you all thought of where the party is going to be?"

"Yea, it's going to be at the Inferno." I look towards the hall where Rosalie walked to earlier. She's talking to someone and I gotta know who it is. "Excuse me sweetie." I walk away from Ashley and she walks over to the living room to talk with Edward and Emmett.

I creep slowly through the hall and lean against the cracked door that Rosalie is in.

"Yea we decided on a place. It's going to be at the Inferno. Do you know where that is? Okay good. Just leave the hotel you're staying at at about 9 tomorrow night and head straight there. Kay, see ya then."

Ooookaaaaay, who the hell was that? I hear foot steps coming to the door so I quickly walk away from it to make it look like I was just coming up the hall.

"Oh, hey Bella." Rosalie says a little startled when she walks out.

"Hey, uh, Ashley's here." I tell her trying my best to be casual.

"Cool. I guess I'll go talk to her then." Rosalie gives me a smile and walks down the hall to find Ashley.

I shove my hands into my jean pockets and make my way to the living room but stop when I get to an oh so familiar door. I stand facing it trying to decide if I really want to do this. I make the stupid decision and twist the door knob open and walk in. I feel for the light switch and flip it on... Alice's room. I slowly look around, trying to fight back the memories. All the framed pictures of us are collecting dust, clothes still clutter the floor. I guess when Alice left everyone decided to just leave the room as is. My eyes land on the unmade bed and the memories break through. My chest starts to ache but I refuse to cry. I reach into my shirt and pull on the chain to reveal the best friend necklace. Yes. I still wear it. I hold onto it with a shaking hand as my eyes continue to stare at the bed...

"Bella, sweetie, where are you?", I hear Ashley's distant voice calling out to me which shakes me out of my trance. I blink a few times and hide the necklace back in it's place against my chest.

I go to walk out the door, placing my hand on the light switch, I turn around to give the room one last scan then flip the light off and shut the door.... leaving everything in darkness...

**I hope it was good enough for all of you. I wanted to make it a bit longer, but I figured I picked a good place to stop this chapter.  
**

**So yea, tell me what ya think! =)  
**


	4. It's My Party and I'll Drink If I Want!

**WOOOOOOOO I got the next chapter up a lot quicker than I thought I would. I'm on a roll! haha. All of you awesome people are my motivation so thank you! I spent all day yesterday at my house so I used my time wisely so I could get another update posted for you.**

**Thank you so much for the great reviews. I love reading them, they always put a smile on my face =p.**

**So, you wanna know what happens next?**

**You reeeeeeaaaally wanna know?**

**Well, I'M not gonna tell ya! Read it for yourself! ;)**

**........  
**

The obnoxious sound of my phone pulls me out of sleep. Why did I pick_ that_ as my ring tone? I rub my eyes and look over at the alarm clock. 7:05 AM. Are you serious??? People know better than to call me this early. Without looking to see who's calling I yank my cell off the bedside table and flip it open...

"You better be dying or something.", I mumble annoyed into the phone.

_"Happy birthday, Bella!"_, Rosalie is waaaaayyyyy too damn perky.

"Damn it Rose, you woke me up for that?"

_"Pretty much_. _And to tell you that before we head over to the Inferno tonight, we're all going to meet up at Emmett's house to run over the game plan."_

"Fine. Okay. I'm hanging up now."

_"Kay see ya tonight!"_

I snap the phone shut and toss it back in it's previous place, letting out a tired sigh. The sleeping form beside me starts to stir awake. I look over at her and smile as her eyes reluctantly open...

"Happy birthday, babe", Ashley whispers giving me a lazy kiss on the lips. "Hows it feel to be 23?"

"Tired..", I tell her simply.

She snuggles into my side leaving soft kisses on my neck, "Well, I guess I shouldn't have kept you up all night."

"With your loud moaning and screaming of my name.", I add while grinning.

She swats my arm and laughs, "You were doing your fair share of that too ya know."

"I am so, so guilty." I lean in and give her a long kiss.

When we break from the kiss she gives a little moan and says, "I love you."

"Yea..." I try looking anywhere but at her. This isn't the first time she's used the "L" word which makes me feel even more like an ass since I haven't said it once to her. She understands though so she doesn't force me to say it. She knows how rough I've had it when it comes to _that_ department. But when she looks in my eyes, she can see how much I care about her so that's enough.... right?

It's getting harder to convince myself that it's enough when I see the disappointment on her face when she doesn't hear it back....

I climb out of bed standing to the floor, letting the sheets fall from around me. I don't bother covering myself. Shes seen me naked plenty of times already so there's really nothing to hide anymore.

I walk over to my dresser and look at myself in the mirror. Whoaaaaa my hair is all over the place. I make a face at my reflection and try to run my fingers through my hair to try and make it look less like a bird's nest.

"So, do you have any plans this morning?", Ashley asks. I watch her through the mirror as she stretches then gets out of bed to find her clothes. She really is beautiful.

"Uhhh, Charlie asked me last week to stop by either _on_ my birthday or the day after to see him. So I figured since I don't have any plans right now I'd just go and see him this morning to kill time before tonight", I tell her as I make my way to the bathroom. I'm in desperate need of a shower., "..unless you wanted to do something, then I can just ride by tomorrow.", I add as I poke my head out the bathroom door.

"No, no it's fine. Go visit your dad. I still have to get your birthday present.", She pulls her top over her head then zips up her jeans and slips her shoes on.

"Honestly, Ash. You don't have to get me anything."

"Yes I do.", She says as she walks over and gives me a peck on the lips, "Do you want me to meet you here tonight and we can ride together in my car? Or just head over to Emmett's?"

"Just head over to Emmett's. We might need both of our vehicles if Emmett and Edward decide to get so trashed they have to pass out in the backseats and we drive them home."

She laughs even though she knows I'm being serious. It's a big possibility that could happen. "Okay, babe. Bye."

I watch her as she walks out my apartment, taking a quick look at her ass before she shuts the door. What? Her ass is cute! I shut the bathroom door and step into the shower to get ready for the day.....

After my shower, I dried myself with a towel as best I could, wrapped it around me, and walked out back to the bedroom to find some clothes to go see Charlie. I guess a pair of skinny jeans, a 'Breaking Benjamin' band tee, and light jacket will be good enough, huh? After slipping on my girly boxers and bra, I pulled on my jeans lovin' the way they make my ass look, and then throwing on my shirt. I might as well go ahead and do my makeup so all I have to do tonight is just change into another outfit. Once that was done, I picked a pair of converses for my shoes of the day, brushed my hair, straightened it a little, and looked myself over in the mirror.

I look pretty damn hot. One thing is missing though.....

I walk over to my bedside table and slide the drawer open, and inside is the BFF necklace. When Ashley is over and we get intimate, I always take it off and hide it away while she's not looking... but I always put it back on...

I drape it around my neck and tuck it away under my shirt as always and then made sure my wallet and phone were in my pocket before walking out the door......... and then walking right back in because I left my keys. I roll my eyes while grabbing the keys off the dresser and walking back out the door to my truck.

.............

About 15 minutes later I'm knocking on Charlie's door. I hear feet shuffling from the living room....

"Bella", Charlie says with a smile so big he'd probably be embarrassed for if I pointed it out.

"Charlie", I smile as he pulls me into a short hug.

"It's great to see you. Come on in.", He motions me into the house. "Ya know you could've just used your key."

"Yea I know. Thought I'd be polite and just knock", I shrug while walking through the door.

"Gotta say I wasn't expecting you to actually come on your birthday.", Charlie walks over to the tv in the living room and turns it off. Wow. He must _really_ be happy to see me or this is some alternate universe.

"Okay. Who are you and what did you do with my dad?", I ask him half serious.

He too looks a little surprised at his action. "I don't know... kinda freaky, huh."

"Very."

"I'm just really happy that your here, Bells. Its been a couple months since your last visit.", He says with a sad smile. I feel a little guilty now. After Alice left, I stayed at home with him all the time. He did his best at the comforting mother role since Renee wasn't really in the picture anymore. She left us when I was 14 for another man. And he actually did a great job. He sat with me as long as I needed him. Of course I didn't tell him what really happened between me and Alice, but he knew I was in terrible pain and that was enough for him to care and be there for me. So over the time me and him became very close so I guess my moving out kinda hit him harder than I expected. But I still try to visit him every chance I can get...

"I know, and I'm really sorry about that dad... I've just been really busy with work.", I tell him honestly while taking a seat on the couch.

"And with Ashley too", He jokes, falling into his recliner. "You and her are still dating right?"

"Yup." I tell him, emphasizing the "p" with a popping sound.

"That's good. She's a real good girl Bella." He says with a sincere smile.

"Yea she is." I'm looking off into the distance thinking about the girl in question.... but she's quickly replaced with thoughts of Alice. God I'm a horrible person.

"Too bad she couldn't visit with you." Charlie, like everyone else, loved Ashley from the moment they met her....

"She said she had to go gift shopping for me." I say with a dramatic sigh.

"Oh, that reminds me." He gets up out of his chair and heads to his room, coming back with a small box that I could easily tell was wrapped by him. Bless his heart he tries. "Happy birthday" He hands over the gift.

"Thanks. But you know this wasn't necessary.", I reach out for the box. I'm actually really curious...

He sits back in his chair with a smile on his face as he watches me tear the paper off. I pull the lid off the box and inside is a necklace with my birthstone on it....

"I didn't know what else to get you. I'd understand if you didn't like it." He tells me with a nervous smile.

"Dad, it's beautiful... thank you so much." I pull the necklace out and place it around my neck, staring down at the sapphire gem in my hand. "You didn't have to do this...."

He blushes and walks over to pull me into a hug. "Yea I did, Bella. You're my little girl."

I love these moments with Charlie....

After I opened my present, we sat and talked for 3 more hours. He asked how work was going and I asked him the same. He asked how all my friends where and I even asked how his favorite baseball team was doing this season and that had him talking for about 30 minutes straight. I'm not much of a sports fan, but I still enjoyed just sitting and talking with my dad....

..................

I heard my phone beep, altering me that I had a text message. I walked away from my closet and over to get my phone....

**"Just got to Emmett's. Everyone is here. You on your way?"**

**Call: Ashley**

I quickly typed in a response and went back to the dreaded closet....

**"Not yet. I can't find anything to wear."**

**Call: Bella**

Not even a minute later my phone beeped again...

**"You could just show up in your birthday suit ;) lol."**

**Call: Ashley**

I laugh and type in another reply....

**"Not a bad idea, babe. But I don't feel like going to jail for public nudity no matter how funny it would be =p"**

**Call: Bella**

I swear I think the closet monster ate all my clothes... I thought I had more than this! My phone beeps again....

**"Awwwweee, okay then. Hurry up!"**

**Call: Ashley**

I look at the clock and holy spit I didn't realize what time it was! It's 8:11. Okay, I give up on trying to find the perfect out fit and just grab a pair of black skinny jeans, a black button-up dress shirt, and my white vans. I always dress casual anyway, why change that just for my birthday? I check to make sure my eyeliner and everything is still in place. It should be since it's water proof. My necklace is still safely tucked under my shirt as I put the one Charlie got me around my neck. I run my fingers through my hair to put a little air in it and I'm out the door... keys in hand this time! I text Ashley to let her know I'm on my way and I speed into the night....well, 'speed' really isn't the word. More like a fast creep....

.....

Turning into the Cullen's driveway, I see that Esme and Carlisle are here. Huh, it's rare that they're home at the same time. I park 'the Beast' in it's usual spot and jog to the front door and walk right in.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BELLA!" Everyone yells together as soon as I come through the door and it startled the hell out of me so I scream... and then Emmett does the same.

"Why did _you _scream!?", I ask without lowering my voice.

"I don't know you're the one who screamed first!", His voice is as loud as mine.

At the same time everyone looks towards Emmett and then bursts out in laughter. I catch the laugh bug too and join in...

Now that I see what they're all wearing, I'm thinking I look a little _too_ casual. Ashley looks beautiful in a pink dress shirt, black A line skirt, and black pumps. Her loose, blonde curls bouncing with each head movement. Rosalie is wearing a pair of black dress pants, a long black jacket with a red tank underneath that shows off her boobs quite nicely... not that I was staring or anything... and her long, blonde hair is flowing down with a little wave to it. And she's wearing those black boots she's been talking about a lot lately. Emmett is sporting a black vest with matching pants and a white dress shirt underneath his vest and black shoes. And Edward is wearing a black leather jacket with a baby blue V neck shirt, dark jeans, and black shoes. Even Esme and Carlisle look better than me and they're wearing pajamas....

"Wow, everyone really dressed to impress.... except for me.", I laugh and look down at my outfit, "The closet monsters ate all my clothes and this was all that survived...." Yup. the closet monster is so taking the blame for this one.

"I think you look absolutely perfect.", Ashley says while strutting over to me and touching her lips to mine.

"You're sweet you know that...", I lick my lips.

"You really do look lovely Bella.", Esme smiles and after the words leave her mouth everyone else nods their heads in agreement.

"How 'bout we let Bella open her presents before we leave?", Rosalie asks turning to me, waiting for an answer.

"Sure. We can do that."

A smile lights up her face as she goes to collect the presents.

"This one is from me and Emmett", she hands me a little envelope. I look over at Emmett, he's smiling from ear to ear.

"Oh, god now I'm kinda scared to open it." I say off his reaction. I still pull the flap back on the envelope and inside is a little plastic gift card. Before I can read what it's for, Emmett tells me...

"It's a card for a free paint job for the beast out there", He motions his thumb over his shoulder where outside my truck sits. "I wanted to buy you a whole new ride, but due to my lack of income right now I'd have to resort to grand theft auto..."

"And you wouldn't believe how long it took us to talk him out of that brilliant idea.", Esme says, giving her son a glare.

"I can imagine." I giggle at how scared Emmett got after Esme's look. He's practically hiding behind Rosalie. "So you want me to paint the rust a new color? I can do that."

"And this is from Esme and I", Carlisle says as Rosalie hands me a jewelry box.

"Sorry it's not wrapped, we were so busy this week."

"That's fine, Esme. I told all of you I didn't need anything anyway." I open the lid and inside is a beautiful sliver necklace with a locket in the shape of a heart. I'm going to have a lot of things around my neck. Maybe I can rotate between Charlie's gift and this one. "Esme..Carlisle, it's awesome. Thank you."

"You can put a picture of someone you hold close to your heart in it." I smile at Esme and out the corner of my eye I can see Ashley looking at me with the hint of a smile after Esme spoke.

"Here you go, Bella.", I almost forgot Edward was even in the room. This is the first time he's spoken in over 20 minutes. "You better use it."

I unwrap his present and inside is a digital camera. An expensive camera. "Oh I will so be using this!" I take the camera out of it's case and put in two of the batteries that were in the pack wrapped under the camera. I motion for everyone to get close together and I snap a photo. "Thank you, Edward."

"Way to make us all look bad, ya ass!", Emmett jokes to Edward.

"That's not hard to do.", He jokes back and gives Emmett a thumbs up.

"Ashley, did you want to give Bella your gift now?", Rosalie asks.

"Oh, yes! Excuse me." I watch Ashley quickly walk out the room and return with her gift. And just by looking at it I know what's in the big, black case without having to open it.

"No way you got me a new acoustic guitar?!", I run over to my girlfriend and pull her into a tight hug and place lots of quick kisses on her lips.

"I figured you could use one. Your older one was looking a little haggard."

I break from the hug to crouch down, opening the case and pulling out a beautiful Fender. Everyone lets out "awes". It's black but when it gets close to the center, it fades into a dark blue. I run my fingers over the strings, loving the bright, crisp sound.

"Thank you, baby." I jump up pulling her into another hug.

"You deserve it.", she laughs.

"I hope you all have fun... Esme and I are going to head upstairs", Carlisle turns back around and adds, "but try not to have _too_ much fun. I don't want a call from the police station at 3 in the morning."

We all exchange smirks and laughs.

"Don't worry, dad. We'll just call Chief Swan if we get too crazy.", Emmett calls out as his parents walk up the stairs.

"Not if he's the one throwing you all into a police car."

And again we all laugh at Carlisle's retort.

"Okay down to business.", Emmett is all 'serious' now. "Who's going to be the designated driver?"

Everyone looks around at each other clearly not wanting the title.

"Me.", I hold up my hand. "I don't want a repeat of my 21st birthday."

"Hahahahaaaaaa, yea, wouldn't want you being thrown on your ass TWICE!."

"Thanks, Emmett." I tell him dryly.

"Ooooh good times, good times..." Emmett pulls me into a hug, still laughing.

"Let's go! We're wasting party minutes!", Rosalie snaps us all out of the memory and we make our way outside.

After Ashley, Emmett, and Rosalie are out the door, Edward grabs my arm and pulls me back inside. "Bella, can I talk to you for a minute?"

I see the look on his face. He looks really nervous about something. Edward is never nervous. "Yea, what's up?"

"Well... I've been dating a new guy for about 2 months now- "

"Edward Masen you WHORE!" I punch him playfully in the shoulder and with a nervous laugh he stumbles back a little, not expecting the punch. "Why didn't you tell me you were seeing someone new???"

"I was just wanting to make sure he seemed like the right guy before I told you...", He rubs the spot where I hit him. "And that kinda hurt."

"Sorry", I laugh. "I'm just excited for you."

"So you show your excitement by punching me?", He asks with an eyebrow raised then shakes his head, trying to get back to the point. "Nevermind that.. I was wondering if you would mind if he's my date at your party tonight... I was kinda wanting to use it as a way to come out to the others....", then quickly adds, "and since I already asked him and he said yes I was really hoping _you'd_ say yes."

"DUH! of course you can! You should know by now you wouldn't have to ask my permission for something like that."

"I know it's just- it's just I'm really worried about what they're going to think.", I've _never_ seen him this worried about something... "Emmett is my main concern... I'm not too sure on how he'll react."

I point to myself. "Heeeellllooooo, I'm gay and he's completely fine with it."

"Yea but it's different. You're a girl so he thinks it's hot..."

"Well.... he could think you and a guy is, ya know..hot..too...", Nice Bella. You're _really_ convincing.

He just stares at me deadpanned.

"Edward", I look him right in the eyes, "We've all been friends for a long time. We all love each other. You being gay isn't going to change that. Give Emmett a little more credit..."

He thinks on it for a second and then smiles, "I guess you're right."

"Of course I am. Now, lets get outta here!", I snake my arm around his and we head out the door and pile into our cars, heading off to the Inferno....

.......

We've been here for about an hour now and everyone is having a blast. Me and Ashley have been sweating our asses off on the dance floor but we decided to take a break. We walk over to where the others are and sit at our table.

"Water!", I yell out over the music. Rosalie hands me my bottle and I take a big swig then pass it to Ashley.

"So, are you glad we did this?" Ashley asks, leaning closer to me to make sure I heard her.

"Surprisingly yes." I say while looking out at the people dancing on the floor. The flashing lights leaving bright colors all over the building. The DJ is actually playing some decent music too. I was hoping there would be a live band tonight but oh well.

I look at all the empty beer bottles on the table... not one of them touched my lips and I'm pretty proud of myself for that.

"I'll be right back.", I watch Edward walk away from the table with two fresh beers in his hand. His date must be here.

I feel Ashley move her lips over my neck and it sends shivers all through my body. I close my eyes and enjoy the feeling.

"Who's that?", I hear Rosalie ask. I open my eyes to see Edward walking back over with another guy who I can't really see because Edward is blocking the view.

He looks over at me with nervous eyes. I give him an encouraging smile...

"Everyone, there's someone I'd like you to meet....", Edward steps out of the way and I can now see the mystery man... only he's not so much of a mystery. The guy standing there is tall, tan, and very muscular. He has short dark brown hair and a charming smile, "... everyone this is..."

"Jacob Black.", I finish for him. Jacob looks over at me and his smile gets wider.

"Bella Swan? Is that you?"

"Wait... you two know each other?", Edward asks clearly confused.

"Yea we were childhood friends." I tell him as I throw my arms around Jacob. Rosalie, Emmett, and Ashley are looking over at the 3 of us with just as much confusion on their faces as Edward had earlier. "Edward, go ahead and finish what you want to say."

He swallows hard and continues, "This is Jacob Black... my boyfriend... we've been dating for 2 months." His nervous stare looks around at everyone, waiting for a response.

The first one to speak is Emmett, "You two have been dating for 2 months without letting us meet him sooner? That hurts dude." Emmett puts his hand over his chest and wipes away a fake tear.

The nervousness that was covering Edward's face is quickly replaced with relief, "Well, I was worried that all of you might scare him away."

Emmett walks over to Edward and pats him on the back while giving him an accepting smile. After Jacob shakes hands with everyone and names are exchanged, he shoulders his way over to me and takes a seat.

"It's been a while, Bella. How have ya been?"

"Gay. You?"

He laughs, "Me too... obviously."

"Which is a shocker actually, since you hit on me so much in the past." I take another drink from my water as he takes a sip of his beer.

"Well, now I know why you always turned me down." we both laugh and continue to talk about old memories and things that are new with us....

....

"You're here? Okay, I'll meet you at the entrance." Rosalie was talking to someone on the phone again. She excuses herself from the table and walks off, getting lost from my view in the thick crowd.

"Hey, hun. You wanna go dance with Edward, Jacob, and me?", Ashley asks a little out of breath from all the dancing she's been doing. She wraps her arms around me from behind and starts sucking on my neck. She usually doesn't act like this when we're in public. I guess the 5 beers she's had has something to do with it...

"Not now, Ash." I say distantly as I try to spot Rosalie again. Why has she been so sneaky anyway? Is she cheating on Emmett? I hope not. Plus I don't think Rosalie has that in her. Ya never know though... People are capable of anything...

But my cheating theory is quickly thrown out the window when I see Rosalie reappear with another girl...

I think my heart just stopped beating, someone better be ready to catch me before I hit the floor because I think my legs might give out too. The girl that's walking with Rosalie has jet black hair that flips out in every right direction, soft pale skin, a face that looks like it was kissed by an angel after birth, big beautiful golden eyes that hold so many memories, and full lips that I've tasted in the past. Not to mention her pixie like body that is under a tiny black dress with matching heels....... she looks absolutely breath taking.

And that compliment fits perfectly because I can't seem to catch my breath.

"That's... that's her isn't it?", Ashley asks with a hint of sadness, and jealousy in her voice. She puts her hand in my back pocket and I feel her squeeze my ass, getting ready to defend her territory.

"Yes... that's Alice.", I manage to whisper out, forcing back the tears. I will _not_ let Alice see me cry... not again. I've never told her who Alice was or what she looked like, but I guess the expression on my face says it all. Emmett and Edward are now standing behind. I can imagine the shock that's on their faces.

Rosalie and Alice finally reach the table and I can't take my eyes off of her.

"Hello, Bella.", Oh, how I've waited so long to hear that angelic voice say my name again. My body is hit with every emotion. It's all too much to take in at once.

"I think I need a shot... or 10."

..............

6 shots of vodka later and I'm stumbling all over the place trying to keep myself balanced Emmett places his strong hands on my shoulders to brace me.

"I think you've had enough.", Even though I'm completely shit faced, I can still hear the concern in Ashley's voice.

"She's way past that.", I hear Edward now.

"Noooo nononononono, I can have more if I want! I'm fine! I'm finer than fine!... I'm GREAT!", I throw another shot back and swallow it down with a twisted face.

"Someone should take her home", Rosalie says.

"I'll go home when IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII think it's time for ME to go home!", I go to take a step but with all the alcohol swimming around in my system, I trip over air and fall to the floor. "........okay I think it's time for me to go home."

The room starts to spin like I'm caught up in a tornado and everything is going black, but not before I see the form of my own personal angel at my side...

"Bella... I'm here.", the angel whispers and then I feel my eye lids get heavy.....

**APOV**

"Bella... Bella." I call out to her but it's no use. She's passed out. "That's it. I'm taking her home."

"No. I'm her girlfriend. I'll take her." A blonde, British girl kneels down at Bella's other side... Emmett told me her name while Bella was refusing to talk to anyone because she was too busy pouring shot after shot down her throat... ASHLEY. That was it.

"Sorry, Ashley. Is that your beer?", I point my head towards the table. She gives me a stiff nod. I also think she's trying to kill me with her eyes. "Then I'm not letting you drive a car with Bella in it."

"You don't know where she lives."

"I know where she use to live... that's good enough." I break from the death stare Ashley is giving me and turn to Emmett. "Will you please carry Bella out to my car?"

"Yea... I'll come back for her truck tomorrow.", Emmett scoops an unconscious Bella into his arms and carries her to the exit.

"Well guys, I was hoping this little reunion would've went better.." I shrug while giving a weak smile. They all have nothing to say to me. Which is understandable.

Out in the parking lot I thank Emmett and he gives me a big bear hug. I wrap my arms around his large frame as tight as I can. I've missed my big brother...

"I've missed you, Tink. We all have."

"I know. I have too. We'll talk later though, okay?"

He gives me a kiss on the forehead and walks back to the club to figure out how everyone is getting home.

I get into my porche, buckle myself up, crank the car, and look behind me at Bella. She looks so peaceful. You almost can't tell the reason she's sleeping is because she drank herself to that point.... and I know that's my fault. Maybe I should've approached this whole thing differently. This could've been avoided. I just wanted to see her so badly. I make sure no one is coming down the street before I pull out the parking lot, driving as carefully as I can... I have precious cargo sleeping on my backseat.

........

I softly knock on the front door. Maybe I shouldn't have came here this late he's probably in bed. I could've just taken her to the hotel I'm staying at. I see the blinds move from the window. Well, it's smart he checks before he opens the door at this hour.

"Alice?", Charlie asks as he opens the door. He's in his pj's and his hair is a mess. yep, he was asleep.

"Hi chief Swan." I wave to him probably a little too perky." It is still chief Swan right?"

"Uhhhh, yeaa... you're the last person I expected to see on my porch at this hour." He sounds like he's still trying to wake up.

"I know, and I'm very sorry about that, but I have Bella in the backseat of my car and she's kinda....out."

"Oh....OH." He repeats, realization coming over his face. Charlie walks over to the car, takes Bella in his arms with a little more difficulty than Emmett, and carries her up to her bedroom with me following close behind.

"Thanks for bringing her home Alice. Really." He says while placing Bella softly on her bed.

"No problem at all... is it okay if I stay the night? I kinda wanna be her when she wakes up..."

"You're always welcome." He smiles at me and then walks out of the room and off to bed again.

I sit down on the bed beside Bella, stroking the hair out of her face. She looks so beautiful.

"Bella, I have so much apologizing and explaining to do... I just hope you hear me out." I whisper to her.

I think about crawling in bed with her, but I'm not sure how she'll react to that. So I place a soft kiss on her temple, deciding that I'll just sleep downstairs on the couch. I give her one last look before turning off the light and shutting the door to let her sleep off the night....

**........**

**How was it???? =D**

**And I didn't realize how long this chapter was till I read it over, haha. But hopefully y'all wont complain =p. The next chapter might not as be as long because I need to kinda break the chapters down a little... maybe... I'm still on the fence about it.  
**

**Thanks again for reading! xxx  
**


	5. The Worst Hangover Ever

**I am so pissed at how this chapter turned out. I have a reason for why it's going to be so short and sucky though!**

**The other night when I was writing up the chapter, my monitor went out while I was typing... AND I DIDN'T HIT THE SMURFIN SAVE BUTTON! So I dropped a few F bombs and other not so nice words and turned off my computer and tried again... well, the monitor worked for about 10 minutes and it went black AGAIN. I had to restrain myself from punching a hole into the screen -_-. So I left it alone for a day cause I knew if I tried it again and it didn't work, I'd no longer have a working computer because I would've threw everything across my room. But an hour ago after I got done with my jog I tried it again just for the hell of it... and praise Jesus it stayed on! But I don't know how long it'll work for so I just typed up what I could. So I'm soooooooooo sorry for the suckyness :(. I just wanted to give y'all SOMETHING to read...  
**

Eyes, don't you dare open. I mean it damn it! If you force me to see the light of day I'll....I'll..... OH GOD I HAVE TO PUKE! I I throw my eyes open and jump out of bed, which wasn't the best idea because my legs feel like jello and I fall into the wall. I make a mad dash for the bathroom and throw my head into the porcelain bowl, emptying everything my stomach contains.... ew, that's not pretty. I just _had_ to look. God hangovers suck so much. After flushing the toilet, I lay down on my stomach, pressing my face to the cold bathroom floor. My throat feels like it's on fire after all that violent puking. I'm pretty sure my breath isn't too great now either. I reluctantly pull myself from the floor and over to the sink to brush my teeth and rinse my mouth out at least 4 times. When I get done spitting the mouth wash into the sink I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror.... I look like hammered shit. Oh well, I really don't care about my appearance at this point. Last night started out great, but then took a fast turn to hell. I'm such an idiot. I shouldn't have drank....

And I just realized I'm not in my apartment, I'm at Charlie's house. How'd I get here? I need some water....I slowly walk out the bathroom door and to the kitchen, taking caution on the stairs. The smell of bacon fills my nose as I get closer. What the hell, Charlie never cooks... I _really_ think I got sucked into some alternate dimension which would explain a lot of things lately... especially last night...

I certainly don't remember much, thanks to my alcohol intake, but I do remember one thing.... Alice was there. No matter what kind of state I'm in, that beautiful face and voice always shines through the fog of my mind....

She's also in Charlie's kitchen. Why is she in the kitchen??? Now I wish I would've showered. Alice is standing with her back to me at the stove flipping bacon in a skillet. There's biscuits on the table too. Huh, I knew Charlie wasn't responsible for that delicious smell...

"Bella, you're alive.", Charlie says as he walks from the living room and into the kitchen to put his plate in the sink. Alice turns around from the stove and a smile forms at the corner of her mouth.

"Barely..", I tell him hoarsely. My throat is so raw... I should really get a glass of water. I can't take my eyes off of Alice though... I just can't believe she's here.... and she's actually looking at me too. Instead of avoiding my eyes...

"Alice, thanks again for the breakfast. It was a lot more satisfying than my usual microwaveable cinnamon bun.", Charlie face turns into disgust just from mentioning it. His cinnamon buns could seriously be confused for a deadly weapon.

Alice gives him an appreciative smile, "Your welcome. I'm glad you enjoyed it." Her eyes return back to me. I break her stare to grab a glass and fill it with water.

"Well, I'm off to work.", it's like Charlie can sense the tension between me and Alice. Lucky he has an excuse to escape it...

"Kay, dad", I give him a salute... why? I have no clue. He raises an eyebrow at me and then walks out the door and to his police cruiser...

Now it's just the two of us....

She turns back to the stove and pulls the left over bacon out of the skillet and onto a plate...

"So, how are you feeling?", she asks while walking over and placing the plate in front of me.

"Like I got ran over by an alcohol truck.", I tell her blankly... this is just too weird. I haven't seen or heard from Alice in 5 years, and her she is cooking me breakfast...

"That's very understandable. You _did_ get pretty crazy.", she giggles and shivers are sent out all through my body.... I've missed the sound of her laugh so much. I've missed everything. I want to just fall into her arms and cry because she's actually _here_. In touching distance... but I wont do it. I wont break and fall at her feet...I have to be strong....

"What happened last night? I can't remember much.", I pull apart a little piece of bacon and pop it into my mouth. Mmmm it's so good. Not too crunchy, not too chewy. My favorite.

"Well, after you stripped down to your underwear and danced on the bar while singing that Hannah Montana song, 'Best of Both Worlds' into an empty beer bottle, you tried to makeout with this _really_ old guy with no teeth and a bad hair piece.", She explains with a straight face....

"Please tell me this is some kind of sick, twisted joke.", my eyes are probably the size of cantaloupes right now.

She blinks a couple times but her face stays the same... but the look of horror that's on my face starts to break her seriousness and then her bell like laughter is heard through out the kitchen. "Oh my god Bella, you should've seen your face!"

"That is beyond cruel.", I say with a sigh of relief...

"Yeaaaa, but it was really funny.", she gives me a sparkling smile while trying to control her laughter. I can't believe we're sitting her talking like the last 5 years didn't even happen... like she never left me.

"So, what _really_ happened last night?", I ask, taking a sip of water.

Her smile fades and her eyes drop to the table, "I met your girlfriend."

I choke on the water I had in my mouth and the sound pulls Alice's gaze back up to me, "Oh really? You met Ashley?"

"Yes. She's very...", I can practically see the wheels turning in her head as she thinks of the right word to say, ".... protective." it came out like it was a question.

"Oh shit what happened?", I ask as I rub my temples, preparing myself for what she's going to say.

"I don't think she likes me."

"And why is that?"

"Because I'm the one who took you home last night.", she says satisfied..

"_You_ took me home?", I ask while looking up and meeting her eyes.

"Yes. Why do you sound so surprised?", the hurt is clear in her voice, "I wasn't about to let _her_ take you home and run the risk of _her_ driving off in a ditch with _you_ in the car."

I look down, running my fingers slowly over the rim of my glass of water trying to hide the blush that colored my cheeks. "So... why didn't you leave when you dropped me off?"

"I wanted to make sure you were alright when you woke up.", she whispers while watching my fingers. I stop and her eyes slowly return to mine. She looks like she's in deep thought.... this can't be good. "We need to talk."........ I knew it.

I let out a sigh. I knew it would eventually come to this, "Call me crazy but I don't really feel up to talking."

"Bella, please... you need to know why I left." I flinch. Words can hurt like a fist. Everything comes flooding back to me in this moment. All the hurt I've been trying to conceal is breaking through. I'm starting to get upset and I can feel the tears building. Why? Why now does Alice walk into my life again after destroying it once already. Did she come back to do more damage now that I have my life in a healthy place again? Is this how she gets her sick kicks?

I take a sharp breath, trying to hold the tears in, "Alice, I've waited 5 years... 5 LONG YEARS to know why you left. I think it's your turn to do some waiting.", she looks down at her hands, anywhere is better than the icy stare my eyes have formed. I hate that I'm making her feels this way, but she's going to have to work hard if she wants to be in my life again... no matter how much I just want to pull her into a kiss and let everything that happened in the past just fade away.

My eyes fall down to her hands that are cupped together and I see... her wedding ring. My eyes shut. I have to control myself. I can't let her see how much that little ring upsets me. I reach a shaking hand up to my eyes and wipe away a tear before it falls...

"I wish you could've been there.", Alice's whispers pull my eyes up to her beautiful, sad face. She's looking down at her ring, using the bottom of her thumb to rotate it around her slender, pale finger.

"I don't.", I knew that would get her to look at me. She looks so... hurt, but yet understanding.

"I wanted you to be my maid of honor.", usually when your best friend asks you to have that title on their special day, you light up with happiness and accept without a second thought.... well, me and Alice aren't 'normal' best friends....

"Alice, I'm sorry... but if I was there, I wouldn't have even been a guest at the wedding let alone your maid of honor", I tell her sadly while shaking my head. "I couldn't stand behind you and watch as you exchange vows with someone who...", I hesitate for a second, but I know she needs to know how I feel. If it hasn't been obvious all along, "... who isn't me."

Her eyes start to water. Like me though she wont let the tears win. She stands up from her chair and walks towards me, grabbing my hands and kneeling down on the floor looking me right in the eyes... I can feel the heat between our hands pulsing like a blazing fire...

"Bella, listen to me...", her tone is so serious that I can't help but listen, "I know what I did hurt you and I'm so, _so_ sorry. I know a 'sorry' will never make it right... but I'm willing to do _whatever_ it takes to gain your trust and love back.. even if I might not deserve it. You're my best friend though and without you in my life, it isn't a life at all... I had to learn that the hard way... so when you're ready, I'll tell you everything.", I watched her angelic face the whole time she spoke. I took in the way her lips moved with each word and how her gorgeous eyes never blinked once. They just stared into me with a force so strong I wouldn't be surprised if she knew what I was thinking right now...

And if that was the case, she would know that I _never_ stopped loving her. She would know how all these years she's always been number one in my heart no matter how hard I tried to let Ashley have it. _Ashley_... she loves me, but I can't love her like she wants, needs, and deserves.... I am a terrible person.

Alice is still looking into me, waiting for me to speak. If I opened my mouth to say something though, everything I've been holding in will wash through. So many tears will spill and probably fill up a glass.

She lets go of my hands and gets up off the floor... I already miss her hot touch in my palms. A soft breath escapes from her lips as she looks around the house that we've spent so much time together in... but never has any time been like this... her eyes look over the stairs that we've ran up and down countless times as kids, over the living room where so many movies have played on the tv while we layed by each other on the floor. We talked and giggled more than we actually paid attention to what was playing... Never in a million years would I have thought that we'd end up where we are now. Both hurting so much... and I _never _thought that we both would be responsible for each others pain....

Now her eyes are back and looking at me, the sadness that has taken over her face is a reflection of mine...

Alice breaks our intense staring competition and walks over to the window at the sound of a car pulling into the driveway. And by the look of annoyance on her face, I can know who it is...

"Your girlfriend is here...", Alice walks back over to me, placing her hands on the sides of my face and looking into my eyes once again, "Bella, I love how strong you are... but once you're ready to fall, I'll catch you.", her lips touch my forehead and my eyes close instantly. It's like a pain that hurts so good.

I watch as she makes her way to the door and is met by Ashley coming through it. The two stare each other down like at any second they could pounce on one another and fight to the death. I would be thinking how hot it is if the previous conversation with Alice didn't leave my head pounding...

"Alice.", Ashley manages to spit out. I'm sure it meant to sound like a pleasant greeting... actually I could be wrong.

"Ashley.", Alice says in the same manner.

They send death glares at each other for a few more seconds before Ashley walks over and gives me a big, wet kiss. Probably just to upset Alice... and it worked. She looks like she's going to be sick. Without another word she walks out and shortly after I hear the door to her Porche slam and then the sound of tires screeching down the street....

I ignore the smirk that's on Ashley's face..., "So, how are you feeling, sweetie?"

"Better now that you're here.", I lie and force a weak smile. She says 'awe' and gives me another kiss. I couldn't tell her the truth. Not now at least. I just want her to think I'm okay. That everything is okay... even though it's a couple county lines over from 'okay'.

A person shouldn't be able to handle this many emotions all at once.... especially one with a hangover.

**I hope it's not _too_ horrible :/**

**And hopefully my monitor will continue to work!**


	6. A Night Out and A Broken Heart

**Hey, y'all! I have another update for you and I think this one is going to be A LOT better. I'm still havng monitor troubles :(, but it stayed on long enough at times for me to write longer.**

**Thanks to all that reviewed last chapter and to all that are reading. I'm glad you're still likin' my story! Y'all are AWESOME!!!!**

**Enjoy!**

**APOV**

I just had to get out of there as quick as I could. I know the way I left was pretty dramatic, but I couldn't stand the sight of Ashley kissing Bella... and I didn't want Bella to see me cry. I take a hand off the steering wheel to wipe the tears on the back of my sleeve. My eyes catch the speedometer and wow I need to slow down. I didn't realize I was going over 70. I ease my foot off the gas a little and as the car comes down to a reasonable speed, so does my heart beat. While stopping at a red light, I lean my head back against the leather seat and let out a much needed breath. I obviously wasn't prepared to see that kiss. Just thinking about Bella kissing someone who isn't me makes me want to lean over and vomit in my passenger seat.

The light turns green and I hit the gas, a little softer now that I'm somewhat calm. When the light was red, I decided to drive by my old home and visit Emmett and my parents. I don't feel like being alone in my hotel room right now... that would give me too much alone time with my own mind...

As I turn the wheel to the left, the sun hits my ring and catches my attention. I glare at it while keeping focus on the road. God I was so stupid. I _still_ am stupid. I pull over to the side when my eyes start getting too hazy from the tears. My hands cover my face as I sob. "Why, why, why, _why?!"_I cry out, slamming my small clenched fist into the steering wheel. The pain in my now white knuckles doesn't stop my assault on the poor, defenseless wheel. I start to shake from the hard sobs my body is unleashing on me.

My fist comes to a slow stop as I start to lose feeling. I close my eyes as I craddle it in my other hand, trying to get my breathing back in order. After 10 minutes of just sitting, I start the car again and finish my drive home.

This wasn't the first time I've had a break down like this. After I left Bella that day at the airport, almost every night I had dreams, scratch that, nightmares of the look on Bella's face... all the sadness, confusion, and hurt that _I_ caused. It was the only thing that took over my mind when I slept. And it always went in slow motion and I could never look away. I was forced to watch the tears fall down her beautiful face. Tears that my stupidity was responsible for. I knew I was being punished every night for what I done... and I deserved every bit of it. Every night I'd wake up in a cold sweat, tears stained on my cheeks. Jasper would wake and ask me what was wrong and I'd always tell him simply it was just another bad dream. He would try to soothe me with comforting words, telling me everything would be okay.... but I knew nothing would _ever_ be okay.

For the longest time while I was in LA, the only memory of Bella that would pass through me were the ones of _that_ day. And when it became too much to handle, I'd take out my rage on whatever was around me. A mirror, a vase, the wall... anything to get out some of the pain. I know I'm small, but when I want I can really tear up some shit. So now I have tiny scars from bits of flying glass or from where I ran my fist through the walls that unless I point them out to you, you wouldn't be able to see.. but I know they're there. Reminding me of everything...

When Jasper would come home from work and see the mess, I'd just tell him I had a clumsy moment. He believed me the first few times, but I think after a while he realized that they weren't accidents... he never asked questions though. I guess he was too scared to know the answer. I wouldn't be surprised if he started putting pieces together and realized that my nightmares I was having were about Bella...

One night last week though, when I closed my eyes to drift off to sleep, the tortured look on Bella's face was not what I saw... it was the night before that pain... the night we were together...

The dream was so vivid it seemed like it had surround sound. I could practically hear her soft whispers and moans. Could practically feel her gentle hands exploring my body... the amazing feeling of when I went over the edge around her warm, slender fingers....

The next morning I woke up feeling so rested and so, so happy. And that is something I haven't felt in 5 years... it surprised both me and Jasper.

I used that dream as a sign. A sign that I should go back to Forks and try to win Bella back... a sign that maybe my punishment is over and I have a chance.

So as the day went I asked Jasper how he felt about me going home for a little while. I didn't tell him about my real reason. Just that I was very homesick and I missed my family and friends. Which wasn't a lie really...

He said that it was a great idea and that once he was caught up with work he'd make a trip down too... since I don't know when that will be, I really need to work fast. I know I'm the one in the wrong, so I can't force Bella... but I have no plans of giving up either. And the fact that she has a girlfriend will probably complicate things a bit...

I told myself before I got to Washington that she would most likely have someone in her life.... but no matter how much I told myself that, the pain of meeting Ashley and finding out that she was Bella's girlfriend still felt like a knife through the chest....

Now I'm pulling into the driveway of my old house, parking in my old spot. Before I get out of the car I look at my reflection in the mirror and I'm _so_ glad I did. My mascara and eyeliner is all over my face which is still red from my breakdown I had earlier. It's times like this that I'm glad I carry around makeup in my purse....

After re-applying everything and looking myself over, I walk out the car and up to the house, knocking on the door.

"Tink!", Emmett picks me up into a spinning hug... sometimes I hate being so small and easily liftable.

"Emmett if you don't stop I'm going to puke all over you!", he quickly puts me down like I'm on fire and backs away with his arms up.

"_Please_ keep everything in that tiny tummy of yours."

I make gagging faces at him while he backs his way into the house as fast as he can. Smiling in victory, I walk through the door and close it.

"Nothings changed at all", I whisper to myself as I take in the house. It's a good feeling to come home after so long and still recognize where everything is.

As I walk into the kitchen I notice even the magnets on the fridge are still in the same positions.

The sound of footsteps coming down the stairs stops my examination of the house. A smile spreads over my face when I see my mother and father.

"Alice!", my mother squeals as she walks over to me as fast as she can in her heels.

"Hey, mommy", she pulls me into a tight hug. "I've missed you so much"

"I've missed you too, baby doll.", I can tell just by the sound of her voice that she's crying.

"We've both missed you", my father wraps his strong arms around both of us and kisses the top of my head.

"Correction, we _three_ have missed you.", Emmett chimes in, joining the family hug.

Being able to hold my family after so long of absence brings the tears out again. But this time they're happy tears.

After a few more moments we all break apart. They're just staring at me with big smiles on their faces. It's kinda creepy... I love it.

"Let me see your ring!", my mom dries her eyes on the back of her hand and reaches out for my ringed one excitedly. "Oh, Alice it's _gorgeous_! Where is Jasper anyway?"

"He's busy with work right now. But once everything slows down he'll be on his way down here."

"What happened to your hand, dear." I look up at my father and he's looking at my hand I used to beat the steering wheel earlier. I follow his gaze and I see that my knuckles are bruised with dry blood. I didn't even realize...

I pull my ring hand away from my mother, using it to hide my other, "Oh, it's- I kinda fell..." that can probably win an award for the worst excuse EVER.

"...And you used your knuckles to catch your fall?", Emmett questions with a raised eye brow.

"I panicked okay", I answer him with a deadpan.

He just shakes his head a little and drops it, "What does Jasper do anyway?"

"He and his uncle own a construction site out there.", I say with fake enthusiasm.

"That's great. You and him are so perfect together."

I hold back a cringe at my mother's words. "Uh, yea.."

"So, Emmett where's Rosalie?", I ask just wanting to get off the subject of me and Jasper. "I figured you and her were pretty much inseparable."

"Usually we are. But her and Ashley made plans to go shopping later on tonight."

_Ashley_.... the more I hear that name, the more I hate it.

"So, who wants to play 'Rock Band'? I CALL DRUMS!", I love how Emmett doesn't even give someone time to answer him. He's such a cheater.

"Fine. Me and your father will help each other on the guitar. So Alice that leaves you on the mic."

"Just like old times.", my dad smiles while we all make our way into the living room.

"Okay. I get to pick first song Emmett so don't you dare touch anything!", I call out to my brother right when he was about to start a song up. He looks at me with a pout and I just roll my eyes laughing. It's hard to believe that he's suppose to be the more 'mature' one...

I feel the pocket of my jeans buzzing so I pull out my phone and my heart flutters when I see the caller ID...

It's Bella....

**BPOV**

After Alice walked out, I took a long hot shower. Wanting to just wash away everything.. kinda like a baptism. Of course it didn't work though. My head is still throbbing from my hangover that's slowly getting better. And that's a good thing because I have to work a short shift at the Inferno this afternoon. I wish I didn't have to because it's going to be really slow. The only people that are there in the afternoon are older couples who are too afraid to come at night, and the drunks who pretty much live there.

Since I didn't have any of my work clothes at Charlie's, I drove the beast back to my apartment with Ashley following behind me in her car. I told her I sobered up enough to drive without a baby sitter, but she didn't wanna hear it.

So now I'm doing my hair and getting ready for work with Ashley sitting on my bed watching.... watching like a freakin' hawk. It's kinda making me nervous.

"Uh, Ash. You know you can go home right?"

"Yes I know.", she gets off the bed and walks over to me, "I just thought that maybe before you go to work, we can play a little."

She then slips a hand into the front of my jeans, rubbing slowly against my center.

A moan spills out of my mouth without permission while I close my eyes..... and I see Alice.

I blink a few times till the image evaporates, "Uh, not now. I don't wanna be late for work."

Her hand stops massaging me and I can see that I hurt her feelings. I've never once turned down sex. But hopefully she'll just chalk it up to the hangover. She takes her hand out of my pants, "Oh, it's fine. I have to go home and get ready to go shopping with Rosalie later anyway."

A light bulb gets flipped on in my head, "Will you two be out when I'm off?"

She nods her head yes while she gets her stuff together.

"So, I guess that means it's okay for me to go out with a friend to." I use my best attempt at a sweet, innocent voice. Hopefully it'll pay off.

"Yeaaaa. I guess... who'd you have in mind?"

Damn. She just has to ask, "Well, earlier at Charlie's before you got there, Alice said how much she wants to get together and kinda .. catch up."

When I mentioned Alice her whole body stiffened.. and now she's just staring at me.

"That's fine... just promise me nothing will happen.", she really knows how to stare me down and make me feel like I'm naked under a light on an experiment table.

I look her right in the eyes, "I promise."... I'm gonna feel like shit if that turns out to be a lie.

She lets out a breath, "Kay.. be careful at work." As soon as Ashley walks out the door I grab my phone and dial Alice's number after a few long rings she finally answers...

_**"Hello?", **_I smile into the receiver at the sound of her voice.

_**"....Bella?"**_**, **Oh shit. I guess I should say something, huh?.

**"Oh, sorry! I uh, dropped a quarter." ... **what the fuck. Can I be anymore of a moron? **"Uh, well, Ashley had made plans with Rosalie later tonight to go shopping, and I thought that maybe if you wanted to we could like... hang out or something?"** Yup. I'm the poster child for smooth....

_**"You didn't want to go on that shopping adventure?" **_I can tell she's probably smirking right now.

**"Shopping with those two? Hell no. I wouldn't make it out alive."**

She laughs and the sound makes me smile like a goober.

_**"Well, I'd love to 'hang out or something'."**_

**"Okay cool! I'll pick you up after my shift."**

_**"Sounds like a plan. See ya then"**_

**"Bye"**

**"**_**Bye, Bella"**_

I stay on the line until she hangs up and then I slip my phone back into my jeans. After making sure I have everything, I lock up my apartment and head out for a boring day at work. At least I have tonight to look forward to....

..........

So work wasn't as horrible as I thought it would be. It was very slow like I predicted, but since one of the local bands, 'Dude, Where's My Guitar?', were setting up for a show they were going to do tonight, I got to help them practice. They play at the Inferno all the time so I became good friends with them. So on slow days when I have nothing to do, I grab one of their guitars and take over the mic and we jam out for all the old folks and lonely drunks. It's always a good time.

Now I'm running around like my head is chopped off and I'm on fire while trying to find something to wear. I want to look good for Alice. I know, I know I have a girlfriend! But it's _Alice_...

I decide on dark wash skinny jeans and a red babydoll top that I didn't even know I had. Must've been something either Ashley or Rosalie bought me and I just hid it away. After I put on a pair of converses that weren't too dirty and made sure my hair and makeup were lookin' good, I tucked my BFF necklace in my shirt, making sure it's going to go unnoticed. I grab a jean jacket and throw it on, checking myself in the floor length mirror...

"Why am I so nervous?", I ask to an empty room. I grab my truck keys, lock the apartment door, and head out... God I hope things go smoothly...

On the drive there, I pop in my 'As I Lay Dying' CD into the player. I think it's funny how my sound system is worth more than the truck itself. I put it on, "The Sound of Truth", turning it up so loud my windows start shaking. This song always makes me feel like I can take on the world and I need that feeling right now. Hopefully it'll kill my nerves. I start banging my head a little, letting the heavy guitar and drums wash over me....

_YEAAAAA!_

_We have all heard, what we wanted to hear_

_Truth that sounds right to our ears..._

Not too long later, I pull into the Cullen driveway, feeling all kinds of good. I'm glad I remembered to turn the stereo down before I took out the keys. I'd hate for Alice to get in the truck and have her eardrums blown out. That would be a _great_ start....

As soon as I get up to the door, my nerves hit me again. I take a few deep breaths, gaining the courage to knock.

"Hey, Bella!", Emmett greets, stepping to the side to let me in, "She's still getting ready. So make yourself comfortable."

"Yea, I remember how long she can take.", I start fidgeting with the sleeves of my jacket. Stupid nerves.

Me and Emmett walk into the living room where Edward and Jacob are relaxing on the couch.

"Hey, Swan.", Jacob calls out while Edward waves.

"We just started watching the newest Underworld. You could probably sit down and have time to watch the whole thing before Miss. Punctual decides to show herself.", Edward says while motioning his head upstairs where Alice is.

"Hell, you might have time to take a trip to Japan after the movie too.", Emmett adds.

We all laugh. I tried not to, but it's just too funny... and possibly true.

"Oh HAR HAR, you're all full of humor.", my attention is pulled to the stairs where the beautiful voice came from. I feel butterflies flutter their wings deep in my stomach when I see Alice. She's wearing gray skinny jeans, a dark blue top with bold patterns that only she can pull off, a long black jacket, and she has black flats on her tiny feet.

She looks absolutely adorable.

"Well, damn Tink, as long as you were taking up there we all thought you were making your own clothes!"

"Shut up, Emmett.", Alice pushes her brother but he doesn't move an inch. He laughs at her attempt.

"So, where are you two going?", Edward asks.

Me and Alice exchange looks. "Uh, were not too sure yet.", I tell him.

"Can we all come?"

"NO.", We both tell Emmett in unison. He steps back a little.

"Sorry. It's just that Bella and I are hoping to catch up some.... alone."

"Fiiiiiiine. Have fun... even though it's going to be difficult without me there.", Emmett jumps into one of the recliners and relaxes into it.

"We'll find a way to manage without you.", I tell him over my shoulder as me and Alice walk out the door....

"Ya know we can take my car if you want.", Alice says as we reach my truck.

"No, no it's cool. My truck isn't completely dead.", I get really tired of defending the beast.

"Kay then.", she gives me a little smile as she climbs in the passenger side while I hop in behind the wheel.

"You look really nice.", Alice compliments while she runs her eyes over me.

I blush under her gaze. "Thanks. You too." I start the truck and push down on the gas, but then it jerks, makes a loud screeching noise, and shuts off. I clench onto the steering wheel, trying my best not to bitch at my truck.

"I wouldn't be surprised if my engine is lying on the concrete.", I say embarrassed. Alice looks down, hiding her smile.

"The offer to use my car is still on the table."

"Just hold on a sec.", I jump out the truck and walk to the front, getting on my knees to see what the problem is. "Ha, you wont believe it..."

"The engine is on the concrete?", she asks while leaning her head out the window.

I peak around the truck, narrowing my eyes at her with a playful glare, "No. That's believable...."

I get off the ground while holding a destroyed bike that once belonged to a 4 year old, "I ran over your neighbor's bike!."

We both burst out laughing. "That also is very believable."

I roll my eyes at Alice's comment, still laughing. I walk over to a bush, making sure know one is looking, and toss the little bike into it...

"Bella, you're horrible!", Alice is laughing so hard right now her face is beat red.

"We'll just blame that on Emmett." I tell her after jumping back into the truck. She just nods her head yes, trying to control her laughter so she can breathe.

After all our giggles are out, I ask, "So, are you hungry?"

"Starving", she answers while smiling at me.

I smile back while starting the engine and driving off down the road in pursuit of a restaurant...

We decided on Chili's and we're now being escorted to our table.

"Your waiter will be right with you ladies, enjoy.", The hostest tells us with a smile. We say thank you and the girl walks back up to the front.

I get a bright idea and pull Alice's chair out for her before she sits.

"Well aren't you a gentleman.", she says with a dazzling smile.

"I believe that would be gentle_woman_.", I correct with a smile of my own while taking a seat across from her.

Shortly after we sit our waiter appears and asks us what we'll be having. We both order the buffalo chicken salad with two Dr. Peppers. Just like we use to.

"So, how's uh, Jasper.", I ask while taking a sip of my drink. I figured I'd be polite and pretend to care.

"He's doing fine.", she answers distantly, eyes dropping to the ring on her left finger while she rolls it around. I don't know what to think of the look on her face...

"Whoa, what happened?", I ask, taking her hand in mine and gently touching my fingers to the cuts on her knuckles. I look to her eyes and I see that they're closed. I stop moving and her eyes slowly open..

"Uh, just me being me."

"Right.", I say with disbelief. My 'best friend senses' are tingling, but I'll ask her about it again later. I don't want to ruin the evening. I realized my hand is still holding hers. She doesn't seem like it's a problem, so I don't move it.

After a minute or so of awkward silence, Alice speaks, "Even though you weren't physically at my wedding Bella, you still were in my heart." she then reaches down her shirt and pulls out.... the other half of my necklace.

My heart bursts as a smile takes over my face. I can't believe it.

"I've never taken it off.", she whispers while her eyes stare into me. I think I might cry as pitiful as that sounds. But even if they're happy tears I can't do it. I gotta be strong... I'm getting tired of it though.

I use my free hand to reach behind my own shirt, "I've never taken mine off either.", revealing my necklace.

She gives my hand she's holding a tight squeeze as we're both smiling across the table at each other.

"Kay ladies here's your food.", our waiter places the plates on the table, "Can I get you anything else?"

"No thank you. We're great.", I answer, still looking at Alice. He smiles, leaves the check, and walks off.

We remove our hands to start eating. With our necklaces proudly showing.

"That was soooo good. But I feel like I'm going to explode from how full I am." Alice says while rubbing her stomach.

I laugh at how cute she looks. "You wanna go hang out at the Inferno for a little while?"

"Sure, lets do it!"

I smile while taking out my wallet, paying the bill and throwing a tip on the table. Then we're out the door...

........

On entering the Inferno, I look towards the stage and see that the band is unhooking their amps and guitars. Damn. I was hoping we'd get here before they finished.

We manage to find an empty table since lots of people are on the dance floor.

"Do you want a drink?", Alice asks as we settle into our seats.

"Nooooooo, I actually wanna remember all of this." I shutter with a disgusted look at just the thought of alcohol.

"I thought I'd ask anyway.", She answers innocently while laughing at my reaction. "I don't feel like drinking either."

The next song the DJ plays I recognize it right away, it's "Duplicity", by Silent Descent. I listen as the electronic sound fills the building and then a scream is heard followed by the the ragging guitars and drums. After about a minute the song slows down and the vocalist starts...

_She asks to look at her, but only with her eyes,_

_Can I ask you a question? No._

_Sitting there as if you don't already know,_

I watch Alice as she watches the people on the dance floor

_You act on innocence though its obviously what you lack the most._

_Untouched, "unbreached"... best described as perfect,_

"You wanna dance?", I ask as I cock my head to the side a little.

She gives a sexy smirk and says, "I was hoping you'd ask." I grab her hand and lead her out to the floor...

_You offer everything just by looking at me._

The song picks back up into an intense beat with growling/screaming vocals..

_I feel the vibes as the pulse runs through me_

_It never was mine, it never was right_

I let the music work it's will through my body, my eyes rolling into the back of my head as Alice grinds her ass into my front..

_I feel the bass in my veins like the blood running through me_

_It excites yet offends me_

I sway my hips to the crazy beat with my arms wrapped around Alice, moving her with me.

_I can't put up with this much longer_

_Feel your waist as the bass grows stronger_

My body starts buzzing as Alice turns around to face me, breathing her warm breath on my neck

_Sifting through the lies, never was surprised,_

_Tangled in your eyes and unwinding the ties._

Our eyes lock as the beat calms back down, both breathing heavily. Her lips slowly move closer to mine as she presses her body into me. I feel like I'm on fire right now.

"Bella", she whispers into my mouth and then our lips meet for a soft kiss. The tingle I've missed so much starts to spread through the rest of my body as I feel her hands snake around my neck.

Before I can deepen the kiss, an image of Ashley flashes through my closed eyes. I pull away from Alice instantly, she looks a little flustered.

"What's wrong, Bella?"

I feel like such an asshole right now. Here I am kissing Alice, when Ashley is probably at home wondering what I'm up to. I reach into my pocket, pulling out my cell.... I have 4 missed calls from Ashley. I rub at my eyes. All of a sudden I feel really tired. "Alice, I think I should go home. I need to think about some stuff."

I can see the worry in her eyes, "Okay, we can leave."

.............

After I dropped Alice off, I went home, picked up the acoustic guitar Ashley gave me for my birthday, and strummed random chords while I sat on my bed. Guitar always helps me think. Just something about the sound being the only thing that's heard is very comforting to me...

I didn't mean for it to go that far with Alice. Even if it was just a kiss... but it was a kiss that opened my eyes...

So here I am knocking on Ashley's door. I'm about to do something that I hope I don't regret... but it's something that has to be done regardless. I notice I still have my necklace showing so I quickly hide it away right before Ashley opens the door.

"Hey, sweetie." She says with a surprised smile, giving me a quick kiss before letting me walk in her house. "Is everything okay?", she asks, taking in the look on my face.

I start pacing, "No, Ashley... there's something I have to tell you", I _really_ should've thought about what I was going to say before I got here, "It's not something you're gonna like and- and I don't want to hurt you but I-"

"Stop", she holds up a hand that silences my babbling, "I already know what you came here for."

"You do?", I ask, looking up at her... oh no, she's crying.

"You're breaking up with me... for her.", she says with silent tears rolling down her cheeks.

"Ashley, I'm so very sorry. I just... I'm just so confused right now! I-"

"Bella, you don't have to explain. I knew that if she ever came back, it would end up like this.", she uses a thumb to wipe away her tears. "I see the way you look at her, and the way she looks at you."

I walk over to her, pushing a lock of blonde hair behind her ears so I can look into her eyes, "Ashley, it hurts me to do this. It hurts so much, baby! But- but I can't be with you when someone else has my heart... I've tried to forget about Alice. I've tried to let you have what was left of me, but I _can't_." I can feel the warm wetness of fresh tears fall down my face as I say these words and see the hurt and sadness in Ashley's eyes.

"Don't worry, I've prepared myself for this moment... I knew it was coming soon.", I can barely hear her now. She wraps her arms around me and I pull her as close as I can. "No matter what, I'll still be here for you... as a friend.", she says while resting her head on my shoulder.

"Thank you for everything you've done for me. You're an amazing woman.", I place a kiss on her cheek when I pull apart from the hug, "And I love you"

"No you don't.", She says with a sad smile.

"I do, but not in the way you deserve.", I walk to the door, leaving her standing in the middle of the room...

"Bella", I turn back to look at her, "I hope she doesn't hurt you again."

I swallow hard, giving her a weak smile, "Me too."

And with that I walk out the door and quickly to my truck. Once I get inside, I fall across the seat and cry....

After a few minutes, I call Alice....

**"Hey, Alice. It's time to talk... meet me at the playground... you know which one."**

I take a deep breath as I start the engine.... this is it.

**Sooooooo how was it?!?! =D **

**I know some of you really like Ashley, but there was no avoiding getting her heart broken =(**

**Please let me know what ya think! And I hope I can get another update soon.**


	7. It's Time To Talk

**Hey lovelies! Thanks so so so so so so much for the reviews! All of you are smurfin' great and I love reading what y'all have to say. I know some of you didn't like how Bella broke up with Ashley so quick, but it had to be done =/. And for the record, she didn't do it just because Alice showed up again... okay YEA it had something to do with that, But she realized she doesn't love Ashley like she should be by now so the breakup was coming either way. Sorry!=(.**

**I know this chapter is kinda short, but I wanted it to be just focused on Alice's conversation with Bella. So I hope you like it!  
**

**BPOV**

I look up into the night sky when the sounds of rolling thunder reaches my ears. Great... weather that's reflecting my mood. A sigh passes through my lips as I return my eyes to my feet that are softly kicking the ground, making the swing I'm sitting in to move back and forth slowly. There's no one here but me. Probably because it's dark and the sky looks like it's ready to break at any moment. Maybe it wasn't such a good idea to tell Alice to meet me here. It just seemed appropriate though... seeing how this is the playground that brought me and Alice together, becoming instant best friends. I close my eyes to see an image of Alice and I at 5 years old playing in the sandbox, laughing and having a great time without a care in the world. I wish it could be that simple again.... the scene stays the same, except the younger us are replaced with our 23 year old selves. Still laughing and carrying on in the sand...

"You want a push?", I slowly open my eyes with a small smile forming, knowing exactly who it is...

I feel Alice's small hands push softly into my back as I start to get a little air born, loving the feel of the cool night breeze against my warm face and whipping my long brown hair behind my back. After a few more pushes, Alice places her hands over mine that are gripping the chains and stops the swing from moving. I turn to look over my shoulder and her face is just inches away from mine. She leans closer in and presses her soft lips to mine and my eyes shut instantly...

"I broke up with Ashley.", I tell her once we part from the kiss. She removes her hands from mine and walks to where she's facing me.

"Did you do that for me?"

"Yes.. and no. It was something that I knew I had to do. I just can't love her in the way she needs. It's not fair to her.", I explain while kicking the dirt under my shoes, trying to take out some of my aggravation on it.

"Do you love me?", Alice asks softly.

My eyes look up from the ground to meet her's, "I love you."

She smiles and even in the night, I can see the sparkle in her eyes, "I love you too, Bella. I've never stopped loving you."

"Then why did you leave me to marry Jasper?", I ask while clenching my jaw.

"Nothing I say is going to make up for what I did..."

"Well, start talkin' anyway."

I know she can tell how annoyed and angry I am. What we're about to discuss is going to reopen a wound that really was never closed... but it's going to poke at it and bring the pain back.

She takes a deep nervous breath, opening and closing her mouth trying to find the words, "One thing needs to be clear, that night.. the night we slept together, it' wasn't a mistake. It opened my eyes and helped me realize and come to terms something...", she has a distant look on her face... remembering.

"And what's that?", I ask impatiently.

Alice looks me right in the eyes, "... exactly how much I love you."

I just stare at her, at a loss for words. So she continues...

"Even before that night I've loved you in a way that went pass close friendship. When we would sit on the couch together watching tv or just talking, I always had the strongest urge to reach out and touch you. To do anything to show you how I felt. I could be so upset and your very presence would make all the bad go away. No one knew me like you. No one else could make my heart beat as fast as you could. No one could make me laugh or bring a smile to my face like you... I never felt that way towards anyone else but you, Bella. Not Jasper, no one. I don't know what was different about that night, but I just couldn't take it anymore. I had to touch you... I had to be with you."

I can feel my blood boiling under my skin. All this time... all those opportunities to say something and she _never_ took them. We could've been together all these years. I can feel my eyes water but I'm just too angry to cry...

"Then why didn't you say anything?! I know you knew that I felt the same! We're best friends Alice so I _know _ you could feel how strongly I felt! And why the _hell_ did you marry Jasper?!", she steps backwards a little as my voice grows louder with anger and confusion. "It makes no fucking sense!"

"Because I was SCARED, Bella!", she yells out, her beautiful voice shaking as tears fall.

"WELL WELCOME TO THE WORLD!", I jump up from the swing with my arms up in the air, "We all have fears, Alice. But we don't run off to marry someone we don't even love because of the fear!"

"I know, I KNOW!", The thunder gets louder as rain starts to fall but that doesn't stop Alice, "I was just SO scared of what I was feeling! I've never felt that way before, everything was just too much... especially with my mother and father CONSTANTLY telling me how me and Jasper are perfect for each other. How if I was with him, my future would be set and I wouldn't have to worry about anything!... if they only knew though.", she takes a deep breath while running her fingers through her wet hair, "There was so much pressure, Bella! And I'm sorry! I'm sorry for everything! I'm so, so stupid!"

"Alice that's insane! Don't worry about trying to please your parents, just be happy! YOU'RE the one who had to go to bed with him every night for the past 5 years, NOT them!" , the rain starts to pour harder as I try to wipe the hair sticking to my face out of the way.

"I didn't want to marry him, Bella. I swear! I couldn't say no though."

"Why not? You have your own brain! I know you're strong enough to make your own decisions, so why didn't you?", I just can't believe she was feeling all this pressure... pressure that was so bad, it forced her to live a lie. It's just not like Alice to do that... and it breaks my heart.

"Because, there was something in his eyes... something that scared me so much... something that told me that if I didn't say yes, I might regret it. The way he acted that whole day was so... off. Like he was a different person.", she says distantly. I can't tell if she's shaking from the cold rain, or the memory of his face.

I clench my fists together at my sides so tight it feels like my knuckles might pop out the skin. I knew there was something bad under that jerkoff. I wish he was here just so I could beat the living shit out of him, "Has he hit you, Alice?", I manage to say through the rage that's coursing through my body.

"No. He's never touched me like that."

I narrow my eyes at her, searching for any indication that she could be lying... I don't think she is."Well, the fact that he touches you in anyway makes me sick to my stomach."I say with disgust... She looks away ashamed.

"Look, Alice... I want you. I always want you. But I didn't just break up with Ashley so I can let you run back to me like nothing happened...".

"Bella, I hate that I let the fears get to me so much. That I cared about what my parents thought. It's stupid and I know that.", she walks over to me, tripping a little on the soaked, muddy ground. I didn't realize how much of a gap we made between each other. When she reaches me she takes my hands and holds them tight, "Trust me when I say I've lived with the regrets of the mistake I made EVERY day.... but you didn't see his face, Bella." she shakes her head from side to side as she falls to her knees in front of me like the wind was knocked out of her, mud flying up from the impact, "You didn't_ see_!", she's crying so hard now I can hear her sobs over the loud thunder and pounding rain. "I'm so sorry, Bella! I'm so sorry! Please PLEASE forgive me! I wanna take it all back! Oh GOD PLEASE LET ME TAKE IT BACK!", she cries out with her tiny arms wrapped around my waist, holding on so tight. All I can do is stare down at the broken girl on her knees... there are no words to describe it. I feel tears falling from my eyes and mixing with the rain on my face as I listen to Alice asking for forgiveness over and over. I put a hand on the top of her head, stroking softly trying to stop her violent shakes that are caused from her sobs. I close my eyes, trying to calm my own self down... but I just drop to the ground with her, pulling her into my arms as I cradle her while she cries. No matter how hard the rain is falling or how close the lightning is hitting, I wont let her go. I can't let her go. So I just hold her safely in my arms while she lets out all the pain and hurt that has built up inside her over the years....

I don't know how long we've been sitting here. Time kinda got away from me. But I just realized that the rain has stopped and so has Alice's hard sobs. All I can hear is rain drops falling from the trees and Alice's sniffles while she tries to regulate her breathing. I should probably get us out of here before we freeze to death from our soaked clothes.

"Alice, let's go.", I whisper to her, afraid that if I speak any louder she might break. Without a word she starts to get to her feet. I stand with her, helping her balance. She doesn't take her arms from around my waist as I walk us to my truck. I stand close behind her as she climbs into the passenger seat, preparing to catch her if she slips backwards. After she's sitting I close the door softly and get in on the driver's side, starting the engine and pulling off slowly.

The drive to Alice's is so silent. I steal a glance over at Alice and she's sitting with her hands in her lap, staring straight ahead like a statue. Mud covers her hands and legs, some on her cheek from where it flew up when she dropped to the ground. She looks so tired and emotionally drained. Like all the life has been sucked out of her. It kills me to see her like this. I look away blinking a little, putting my focus completely on the road. If I look at her I know I'll cry even though I don't think there's any tears left in me.

Once I pull into the Cullen driveway, I see that the only light that's glowing in the house is the living room's. Good. That means that they're all asleep and I can get Alice in without being hit with a million questions.

After I turn off the engine I wait to see if Alice is going to make a move to get out, but she just sits there. Unaware that we even stopped moving. But when I put my hand on the handle opening the door she does the same and gets out.

We walk to the house and up to her bedroom without exchanging a word. She stands in the middle of her room with her arms wrapped around herself, shivering from the cold. I quickly walk to her dresser, pulling out a pair of pajama pants and a shirt.

"Here, put these on then get under the covers to warm up.", I tell her softly. She extends a hand out to take the clothes, holds them close to her chest, and walks into the bathroom to change.

She returns a couple minutes later, still looking so fragile. I watch as she gets in bed and pulls the covers around her, taking in a deep breath when she gets settled.

"I guess I better, uh, get home.", I start to make my way to the door but her weak voice stops me.

"No...will-will you just stay a little longer? There's more I want to tell you."

What else is there to say? I walk over to the chair that's sitting by her bed, but she lifts up the covers, inviting me in.

I shake my head a little unsure, "I don't know, Alice. That might not be a good idea. I mean, my clothes are so dirty and-"

"Please?", her eyes are softly begging me.

How can I say no to her? Especially with the state she's in now. So I kick off my shoes and climb in beside her, trying not to get too close. But she slides over to me anyway, laying her arm across my midsection. I was wanting to keep a good distance away. One reason being that she just got on clean clothes and she's trying to get warm...

After a few minutes of comfortable silence, Alice started talking and I found out somethings that disturbed me so much. It turns out that Jasper was abusive towards her. Not physically, but emotionally. At least that how it seems to me. She said that once they were in LA, he changed. He became very possessive of her. Said even some days she wasn't able to leave the house without him with her. I asked why she didn't call and tell anyone what he was doing and she said that he had taken her phone and disconnected the house phone so she could have no contact to the outside world... that explains why none of my calls were ever returned. The only time she got her phone back was when she decided to come down to Forks for my birthday. I asked her why she never tried to leave the house to get to the police, but she said that Jasper had told her that he had paid one of his neighbors to watch over their house and to call him if anyone entered or left. She was basically like a prisoner in her own home. It made me so sick and so angry that there are people low enough who could watch someone _knowing_ that something wrong is going on and not say a word just for money. As she talked I started putting things together and thinking back on times when I watched the two of them. I knew Jasper had his moments where he got loud at her, but it was nothing like what she was telling me now. The asshole is a real piece of work. He wanted to get Alice away from everyone she knew and loved so he could try and control her without being noticed of what he was doing and by taking her away from everyone, there was a better chance that he could get away with it. I knew I had a good reason for hating him. I just wish now I would've acted on the urge of beating him senseless when I was around him.

But then Alice said he wasn't like that all the time and that's what confused her. She was really confused when he said it was a good idea for her to come home to visit... I guess it was a 'good' day for him. She said even if he said no though she would find a way out no matter what. There were days when he was like how he was when they first started dating, but then there were days where he was a completely different person. Overbearing and giving her that look she said he gave her when he asked her to marry him. She mentioned a lot while she was talking how she wishes so much that she would've said no to him. Ignore the fear she had and just left him to come back to me... she said getting out of bed that morning after we were together was one of the worst mistakes of her life. It kills me _so_ much to know that Alice was living like this all along. Being treated like an object....

One thing is for certain though, she will _never_ be treated that way again. Not if I have anything to do with it.

Its been about 20 minutes after Alice got done telling her story. I'm still laying in bed holding her, listening to her soft slow breaths. I'm so upset. I can't believe Alice was going through all this and I didn't know what was going on. If I did I would've found a way to LA years ago to pull her away from all of that.... I'd probably go to prison for killing Jasper too, but hey, I'd go with a smile on my face.

"When Jasper comes back to Forks, I'm ending it.", Alice's shaking words snap me out of my vision of beating Jasper with a lead pipe. I look down at her as she looks at her ring. "It's time for me to get my life back.". I can tell how ashamed she is that she even let it happen. And it's shocking to me since Alice was always a strong minded girl who would never let anyone walk over her... she had a moment of weakness though and it consumed her.

"Are you going to take that off?", I ask while nodding towards that damn ring.

"I want too, but I know if my parents or someone sees it off they'll ask questions and I don't want them to be pulled into this... not now at least."

I understand, but it still makes me want to rip it off her finger and sell it for scrap metal.

"Just go to sleep, Ali.", I whisper softly into her ear, "we'll worry about this later.... Just rest now and dream sweetly."

She nods her head and snuggles closer to me, if that's possible. I watch as her eyes drift shut and a calmness washes over her face.

I had every intention of leaving to go home to my own bed when I brought her home so we could have a little space... but now nothing could pull me away from her...

I stay awake until she's in deep sleep, watching over her to make sure she's sleeping peacefully.

"It'll all be okay", I say sleepily to the quiet room as my eyes shut...

It can only get better from here... right?

**.............**

***Asks nervously* how was it?=]**

**Please review and let me know!  
**

**xxxxx  
**


	8. A Night With Friends and Awkwardness

**I had some difficulty with this chapter. I don't want to rush Bella and Alice's relationship so it was hard to write this one. But I'm not too disappointed with it. Especially since I spent today writing most of it. I wasn't home a lot the past few days but I wanted to get a new chapter up because y'all are too cool for school! =D.... and I can't believe I just said that -_-**

**ANYWAYSSSS, thanks so much for the reviews, every time I read one I get all warm on the inside, so THANK YOU.**

**...................**

My eyelids start to slowly open and close back, shielding my eyes from the morning sunlight streaming in through the window. It feels like I _just_ went to sleep like 2 hours ago.... actually, I think I did. I groan and look to my left to be met by a pair of gorgeous golden eyes staring back at me. Startled, I jump back a little. Alice's musical laugh fills the silent room.

"Didn't mean to scare you.", she says amused.

"No, no you didn't scare me...", yea that sounds reeeaaal convincing, "okay, you kinda did, but in my defense it's really early so I'm a little twitchy."

She giggles at my awkwardness, "Well, I like twitchy, early in the morning Bella. She's pretty adorable."

Alice looks so well rested. The way she was last night is like night and day compared to how she is this morning. And I hope it stays this way.

A smile plays at the corner of my mouth as I look down, trying to hide a blush with my messy hair. I hate how everything this girl says to me brings red to my cheeks. It's a little embarrassing. Just shows how much power Alice holds over me. Damn I feel gross. I knew falling asleep in these muddy clothes wasn't a good idea. I'm probably going to need a chisel to get out of them. A shower is definitely priority number one...

I'm pulled out of my thoughts when I feel the bed shift. Looking up, I see that Alice has invaded my personal bubble. Her face is barely an inch from mine. More heat runs to my cheeks as I just sit there staring at her like a deer caught in head lights.

And before I have time to say anything I feel her lips on mine and the heat that was in my cheeks is now roaming all over my body. My eyes close as my lips slowly move against hers. God I love kissing Alice. I could do it all day long and never grow tired. I place a hand on the back of her neck as our lips work. I really need to stop this. We're suppose to be taking things slowly, but any effort I had of doing that is gone once I feel her tongue gliding along my bottom lip and her hand running up my body and through my hair. I open my mouth granting her tongue entrance that it so desperately wanted. Alice's moan gets me even more worked up as I start to kiss her more forcefully.

A knock on the bedroom door silences our smacking instantly and we pull apart, staring wide eyed at each other.

Emmett's voice breaks the quiet, "Alice, mom wanted me to tell you breakfast is ready."

"Okay, thanks", Alice answers.

The nervousness of being almost caught in her words go unnoticed by Emmett, "I saw Bella's truck in the driveway did she stay over?"

"Yea, I'm here.", I say, still staring into Alice's eyes.

"Cool. Then both of you come down to eat.", Once Emmett's footsteps are heard we both let out a breath of relief at the same time.... I know what _I_ want to eat right now, and it's nothing Esme has fixed downstairs.

"What are you smirking for?", Alice asks with a questioning look.

Shit. I guess I let my imagination get a little too far. "Uh, just... nothing."... I'm so pathetic.

"Riiiight", Alice says with an arched eyebrow. I watch as she climbs out of bed and holds out a hand to help me up, "Well, we better get downstairs before Emmett eats everything. I'm so horny!"

I snap my head up so fast to look at her I'm surprised I didn't get whiplash, "What did you say?"

"I said I'm hungry.", she tells me extra slowly while giving me a funny luck.

"Oh", I shake my head a little, trying to get my mind out of the gutter. Alice gives me a playful smirk then walks on ahead leaving the bedroom with a little extra swing in her hips.

"I'm_ starving_.", I say to the empty room. I take a deep breath trying to control my hormones while watching Alice's backside as I follow her down to the kitchen.

"Wow it smells so good in here", Alice says while inhaling the kitchen air with a satisfied expression. I smile at how adorable she looks and then giggling when she skips over to the table and jumps into the chair in front of the big plate of pancakes.. and by the look on Emmett's face, he had picked that seat first.

"Uhhh, Tink. You know you're going to have to get up right?", Emmett asks as he finishes taking the eggs out of the skillet and onto a big plate. He walks over to stand by Alice, holding the spatchula in his hands like it's a threatening weapon.

"Sorry. I was here first.", Alice says with a taunting smile while rubbing her butt into the seat to get more comfortable.

"Yea? Well I _thought_ about sitting there first!"

"That doesn't count and you know it!"

"Oh my gosh you two are worse than two little kids. Emmett, just pick another seat.", Esme says, acting like she's annoyed by there bickering. But I can tell by her smile she's so happy to have Alice home like it use to be.

"Bella, you take a seat...", Esme's smile turns to confusion when her eyes fall on me, "...too."

I look down at myself... oh god. I forgot I haven't changed clothes or took a shower.... well this is awkward.

"Did you like, get into a mud wrestling contest?", Emmett asks, taking his attention off the chair under Alice and over to me. "Was it with another girl? And if it was why wasn't I invited to witness it?"

Emmett's excitement is quickly brought to an end when Alice sends a glare his way that could kill. I can't help but smile.

"Well, what _did_ happen?", Esme asks.

My mind shuffles through lies I could use but nothing works. What the hell do you say to explain something like this?

"Bella's truck stalled last night so she got out to push and since it was so muddy from the rain, she slipped."

Well, I guess that's a way to explain it. I send a smile of gratitude over towards Alice and she gives a soft smile back. The truth of last night can not be brought back up. It'll destroy Alice and I wont allow that.

"A simple slip caused her to look like _that?_". Why does Emmett choose today to push something?

"No. When she got up the first time she slipped again.. and again. You know Bella has her clumsy moments", Alice adds with a laugh to sell the lie.

Usually I'd be annoyed that someone points out how clumsy I can be, but right now I'm thankful for it.

"Ha, so true.", Emmett returns his attention to his breakfast, sitting in another chair, and stuffing his face. Good. He'll keep his mouth shut that way.

"You really should be more careful, hun.", Esme says as she sits down at the table and motions me to do the same.

"Workin' on it.", I take the chair next to Alice and she smiles at me. I feel her hand rest on my thigh under the table as I put a couple pancakes on my plate. I look over at her and she's looking down at her plate, using her other hand to cut up her eggs. She smiles innocently as she brings her fork to her mouth. She's too adorable for words. I return my focus to my own food.

All through breakfast Alice's hand stayed on my thigh... and a grin stayed on my face.

.....

"Breakfast was great, Esme.", I said after putting my plate and glass in the dishwasher. "Now I can go to work with a happy stomach."

"You have to work today?", Alice asks disappointed.

"Yea. I'm not too pleased about it myself.", It's going to be another slow afternoon. But I think the local band is going to be there for practice again so hopefully the time will pass quickly... and then I can get back to Alice.

Her bottom lip turns into a little pout and it's taking all my strength to not take it in my mouth and suck it right here in front of her mom and brother.

"I was hoping that we could've spent some time together", she says somberly. Then she adds in a whisper that can only reach my ears, "Unless you think it's too much. I wouldn't want to rush you or anything."

"Oh, no trust me I'd rather spend time with you over time with a bar room full of old drunks... old drunks who sometimes forget to tip."

Her pout turns into a smile as a giggle finds its way through.

"So, how 'bout when I get off we can do something?", I watch as she places a finger on her lip to think over my offer for 'dramatic effect'.

"Hmmm, I guess that's doable.", she says with a grin.

I take a dramatic breath and wipe fake sweat off my forehead just to hear her laugh again... and there it is. I swear, you can take her laugh and put it on a cd and it would sell like hot cakes...

"What's doable?", Damn Emmett and his nosiness. I look at him while he stands there waiting for an answer... I guess he's not taking my stare as a hint that it's none of his freakin' business.

"Me and Bella were making plans to hang out after her shift.", Alice says also annoyed with her older brother.

"That's perfect! I was thinking about gettin' the gang together tonight just to chill.", Alice and I just stare at him with a 'what's your point?' look, but again he's completely oblivious, "Sooooo why don't we all chill together?", he moves his hands in a circular motion.

I look over to Alice, trying to read her for an answer. She looks at me and just shrugs. I look at Emmett again and he speeds up his circling hands with a smile as if that will convince me....

"Fine. We'll _chill_ together", I decide with an eye roll while mocking Emmett's circling hand technique.

"Sweet! It's gonna be just like old times!", He pulls us both into a tight hug then walks off to the living room.

"Yea... like old times.", Alice says with a sigh. Clearly upset that we wont be getting any alone time together tonight... I'm kinda afraid of what might happen if we _were_ alone. This morning if Emmett didn't come upstairs and knock on Alice's door, I know things would've went a lot further than kissing. So maybe I should thank Emmett. I want to take things slow and try to have a fresh start with Alice, but there's a part of me that's saying fuck all of that and just get down to what you both want and need... I'm not too sure on what part is winning right now.

I glance up at the clock over the stove, "Shit, I gotta go. I still need to get a shower before work."

Alice takes my had in hers, giving it a tight squeeze. Since Esme is still walking around in the kitchen, it'll have to replace a kiss that she probably wanted to give me, "See you tonight."

I squeeze her hand, returning the 'kiss', "I'll be back before you know it."

She smiles and I can feel her watching me as I walk out the door.

........

I'm on my way back to Alice's now that I'm finished for the day at the Inferno. It actually turned out to be a good afternoon. A bunch of people stopped in to have a few drinks and watch a baseball game on the big screen we have on one of the walls... or maybe it was football... basketball? Eh, I don't know and don't care. The tips I got though, now that's something I _do_ care about. Quite a few 10s and some 20s are now resting happily in my wallet. I kept the whole group happy by constantly being on my feet, ready to set down a fresh bottle of beer in front of them as soon as they emptied their other one. I did lots of shots too... not as in _I_ did the shots myself! No, _fixed_ shots for others would've been a better choice of words. So don't think I let alcohol take me over again!

I park my truck in the spot that has pretty much been claimed by me... really, the grass is dead and there's tire tracks from where the beast has dug into the ground in the same spot over and over. All I need is a sign that says "Reserved for Bella". Ha, I should so get one of those.

When I step out, I notice that one of my hubcaps are loose. So I give it a little kick, thinking that it'll just pop back in place. But no, what does it do? It completely falls off.

"Of course", I say with a huff, picking it up and tossing it into the bed of the truck with a loud banging noise. "I'm going to end up having to use duct tape just to hold you together.", I give the truck a glare then walk up to the house and knocking on the door.

Alice greets me with a bright smile, "Bella."... I love it when she says my name.... great. now my mind is back in the gutter. I think it has a condo there.

"Hey beautiful.", I said it so low I'm not even sure she heard me. She pulls me into a tight embrace that probably is lasting longer than it should be. I softly run my finger nails up and down her back. She presses closer to me at the contact. I take in a deep breath when I feel her chest press harder against mine and causing her lovely scent fills my nose. I can't put a finger on what it is, but god it's awesome and I can't get enough of it. Her lips brush against my neck when she pulls away from the hug.

When her face comes back into view, her cheeks are covered with a shade of red... good, I'm not the only one then. I throw a smile her way before heading to the living room where I can hear everyone else. Alice jumps in my path though, almost causing me to run into her.

"Uhhhh, what's the problem officer?", I ask, raising an eyebrow at her nervous face.

"You can't go in there."

"And why is that?"

"You just can't."

I laugh at her well thought out reason for why I can't enter the living room while side stepping out of her way, "Well, I don't smell smoke so it's not on fire. I don't hear any signs of chaos, sooo yea. I think I'm gonna go in."

Before I have time to cross the living room threshold I feel Alice's small arms pulling at the back of my shirt, causing me to be jerked back into my previous position. I stumble a few times before regaining my footing. I look at her bewildered, "What the hell was that all about???". I'm also shocked she has the strength to throw me around like that...

"I told you! You- wait, did you yelp?"

I stare at her amused face, "Almost getting yanked out of my shoes by a pixie tends to bring weird sounds out of me."

Her amusement remains for a few more seconds, but then she shakes it off and takes a peak into the living room. I guess making sure no one heard our little struggle and my 'yelping'.

"Just wait a sec, I need to tell you something _before_ you go in there."

I narrow my eyes at her, "Who's in there, Alice?"

Without waiting for an answer, I steal a glance into the living room and then quickly look away wide eyed when I see who's sitting on the couch by Emmett and Rosalie,

"Oh my god, Ashley's here?!", I guess I didn't notice her car outside because I was too busy bitching at my truck.

Alice puts a finger to her lips, frantically telling me to lower my voice.

"Yes! That's what I was _trying_ to tell you!", she 'whisper yells'.

My eyes dart in every direction as if looking for an escape route. I guess it's pretty obvious that I'm nervous about seeing Ashley again. I wasn't prepared to face her so soon. And Alice being here at the same time is like the cherry on top of all of it.

"Why didn't you call or text me to give me a heads up?", I ask her while trying to keep my voice at a reasonable level and running a hand through my hair. It's a nervous habit.

"I was afraid if I did you wouldn't show up because you're like...", She thinks for a second, trying to find the words, "in hiding or something!"

"Oh come _on_! That's just-.. okay, it might have crossed my mind.", I admit only half serious. Why would I hide from Ashley? Yea sure I'm a little shocked she's here, but then again she _is_ part of our group and we're all still friends so why wouldn't she be invited?

"Look, Bella... Bella!", Alice puts her hands on each side of my face, snapping me out of my busy thoughts and focusing completely on the little angel herself, "you can do this. Everything is going to go fine."

"How do you know?". Seriously, how could she? Ashley definitely isn't Alice's biggest fan...

She smiles softly up at me, "Because I'll be right there with you. Just like you have been for me."

Her sincerity magically makes my nerves disappear. She's right. That's one of the million things I've always loved about Alice. She always has the ability to make me feel at ease. Even when we were little she was able to raise my spirit when I knew I was about to get in serious trouble for something. Her words or a simple squeeze of her hand could do wonders...

Alice gives me a quick peck, "You could use a little courage", she whispers against my mouth.

"Hmmm, I think I need a _little_ more.", I tell her with a smirk.

She playfully rolls her eyes but still places another soft kiss on my lips.

I then face the living room, still out of view and take in a few breaths before walking in.

"Hey! We were all wondering when you'd get here.", Edward says when he looks up from whispering something in Jacob's ear. Whatever it was Jacob seems very pleased with it.... and my mind just _had_ to imagine the possibilities.

Everyone else as if on cue looks up too. It's kinda weird how we all do that. I smile at Edward, Jacob, Emmett, and Rosalie, saving Ashley for last. I hope when I got to her my smile didn't turn into a nervous twitch of the lips.

"Hi, Bella.", she says with a genuine smile. Alice appears at my side and Ashley's smile falters for a split second. It was almost unnoticeable.

"What? No rushing over to have a quick makeout session right in the middle of my living room?", Emmett asks with an amused smirk but still curious.

Oh this is great. I forgot that none of them know me and Ashley are no longer dating.

You can practically feel the tension building in the air as me, Ashley, and Alice send nervous glances at each other while trying not to look at any of the others, afraid that one of us might reveal everything.

Out of the corner of my eye I can see Alice shuffling uncomfortably. I finally open my mouth to say something, _anything _ to get the attention off of us, but Ashley's voice interrupts me...

"Bella and I decided to call it quits not too long ago."

"Oh my gosh. Why?", Rosalie asks surprised and a little hurt that me or Ashley didn't tell her first.

Again I go to say something, but Ashley starts to talk...

"We just decided that things weren't going in the right direction with us", she explains with a shrug, "it was for the best."

As everyone is busy exchanging looks of shock that none of them knew or could sense the breakup, I looked into Ashley's eyes and mouthed, "Thank you."

I can't believe that Ashley would come to my rescue, but she did... Actually I can believe it. She's just awesome like that.

She sends a nod my way with a smile attached.

"So, who's ready to watch the movie?", Emmett asks once the shock of the news is over with...

.....

We decided on 'Resident Evil: Extinction' and I'm glad it's something I've seen plenty of times already because I can't seem to focus on it. Sitting right smack in the middle of Alice and Ashley is making it difficult.

They've been stealing glances at each other the whole time. Like two lions staring each other down over a piece of meat.... yep. I'm the meat.

Even if Ashley understands and accepts my reasons for breaking up with her, that's not going to stop her from wanting to watch over me. I can see it when she looks at Alice... she's afraid she's going to crush me again.

But Ashley doesn't know the whole story. She doesn't know what Alice had to go through the past 5 years. She just thinks that Alice was a girl who left me broken for a guy....

"Are you okay?", Ashley asks.

Her breath in my ear causes me to flinch a little. This whole situation has turned me into a twitchy, nervous mess.

"Yea. I'm fine.", I say awkwardly.

Alice looks over when she hears me and Ashley talking.

"I'm fine. Really.", I say loud enough to reassure both of them.

I force myself to look at the tv. Oh, it's at the part where Carlos decides to sacrifice himself by wrecking the truck and blowing it up in the mass of zombies so everyone else can reach the helicopter... I can't believe I finally tuned in at the end of the movie.

Ashley and Alice exchange another look as I sink into the couch, hoping that it would swallow me up...

I'd much rather face a million zombies over this any day....

.....

**APOV**

After the movie ended we all played a couple hands of Rummy. I'm not very good at it, but I still enjoyed spending time with my friends. It's something I missed doing. Plus it was really entertaining listening to Bella and Emmett trash talk each other and accusing the other of cheating.... turns out Emmett really was cheating though. When he stood up to get some chips out of the kitchen, an Ace was stuck to his butt.

Now I'm standing with Bella by the front door. Everyone else has left except for her.

"I really wish you'd stay.", I slide my hands into hers while looking in her eyes, thinking that maybe I can hypnotize her into coming upstairs with me. If only I had that kind of power.

"You don't know how much I want to. Believe me.", I do believe her. I can tell in her voice that she's fighting herself over it.

"Then stay. There's nothing stopping you."

"_I'm_ stopping me."

"Bella, you don't have to be strong.", I tell her softly, "Please... I- I don't want to be away from you. I've done plenty of that in the past. More than I can stand."

I lean into her touch as soon as her hand rests against my cheek, "It's for the best, Ali."

No. It's really not. Because when I'm away from her, all the pain of what I've done finds it's way back to me. Unwanted thoughts of Jasper and the worry of what might happen when he returns to Forks takes over my mind.

I look down at our intertwined fingers. At where light scars are forming from my little episode in the car... and at that fucking ring. "Yea... I guess you're right."

She starts rocking back and forth on her feet. With every rock she gets closer to my lips, debating on if it's a good idea....

I make up her mind for her by pushing our lips together and closing my eyes, getting lost in the feel of Bella's wonderful lips.

She pulls away suddenly and I whimper in protest.

"Emmett's coming.", she whispers.

And as soon as she says it I can hear Emmett approaching from behind. I pull my hands away from Bella even thought it's completely normal for best friends to hold hands, but I guess the fear of being caught is making me question my actions with Bella. Even if it looks innocent enough.

"I thought you left already", he says when he sees Bella at the door.

"Yea, well I thought you were asleep.", I shot back at him, probably a little more annoyed than I intended.

"Sorry?", He questions, "I left my ipod down stairs. Didn't know I was breaking a law by coming to get it."

He grabs his ipod off the table it was on and walks back upstairs.

"I really should go", Bella gives me a quick goodnight kiss once we hear Emmett's door shut. "I'll see you soon."

I wait till her truck disappears from my view, then I walk to my bedroom, sulking the whole way.

Once I shut the bedroom door, I crawl into bed and snuggle up with a teddy bear I found this afternoon while cleaning. It was a bear that Bella won me at the Fall Festival our junior year. She spent about 34 dollars on it because she was determined to knock over all the bottles to get it for me after I told her how cute I thought it was. I tried to talk her out of it, saying it was a waste of her money... but she said I was worth it.

And tonight I'll have to hold it instead of her.

Before my mind can drift to the usual badness, I think back on my conversation with Ashley before Bella arrived tonight... I might not like the girl very much, but I do respect her... and I think that someday we could actually be friends... maybe. I'm not promising anything that's for sure....

_***FLASHBACK***_

_"Alice, can I have a word with you?"_

_"Uh, sure.", I follow Ashley as she walks into an empty room, shutting the door after I enter._

_Now I'm a little nervous. I hope someone can hear my screams if she decides to attack me..._

_I swear, this girl has a stare that could make the devil himself run away screaming in fear._

_"So, what's your word?", I ask growing more and more self conscience under her gaze._

_"Look, I don't know what your deal is and I personally don't care right now.", she starts as she crosses her arms over her chest and walks slowly to me, "but I do know one thing, when you left Bella, you didn't just break her heart... you destroyed her."_

_"Trust me, I'm fully aware of that.", I tell her while looking down at my feet, trying not to cry, "It destroyed me too...", her scoff pulls my eyes back up at her, "you don't know everything, Ashley. When I say leaving Bella was the hardest thing I've __**ever**__ had to do, I mean it... nothing I do will change that day."_

_Her hard exterior starts to soften a little while she listens to what I'm saying and letting it soak in._

_"I'd give anything to go back and just wake up next to Bella.", I look back down when tears start to escape, "... but I can't."_

_"You don't have to explain yourself to me. Obviously there's something I'm missing, but I don't care..."_

_I wipe my tears away so I can look her in the eyes as she continues..._

_"... just promise me you wont hurt her again. That's all I ask. I care about Bella greatly. I've seen her at her worst and I know how fragile she can be. I also know how much she loves you and I know you love her as well."_

_"I do. Very, very much."_

_"Then here's a word of advise, don't screw it up this time.", she gives me a weak smile and I return it._

_"I promise."_

_She pulls me into a hug which surprised me... I thought she was going to hit me._

_"I guess we better get back to the others.", I nod in agreement and we walk to the door._

_"You have Bella's heart in your hands... protect it.", she whispers to me and then walks out._

_"Always.", I say more to myself._

_***END OF FLASHBACK***_

Ashley really is great and understanding.... I wonder if it's a British thing.

I pull the covers over me and close my eyes, welcoming the dreams of Bella....

...............

**Hope you enjoyed this chapter!**

**xxx**


	9. Good Times and A Damn Phone Call

**Yay I have an update for y'all! I wish I could've had one up sooner but I was sick =/. And today I was feeling A LOT better so to celebrate my good health I went with a friend to the mall and the Casino(To eat cause I'm still not old enough to play-_-)=D LOL. And when I got home I decided that part of my celebration would be getting a new chapter up too! =)**

**Thanks so much for the reviews guys! Y'all make my day!**

**And there's a lot of people reading my story so I'd really, REALLY appreciate it if those of you who haven't left a review could maybe possibly start doing that... pleeeeeease? I know odds are not ALL of you are going too, but it would be nice lol. I love hearing what all of you have to say. So let me know!**

**I know this chapter isn't going to be so great but it's the best I could do for now so I hope you enjoy:**

**.....  
**

_***ONE WEEK LATER***_

Things are going so smoothly with Alice... which really, really surprises me since my track record with things actually going the way I want isn't very impressive. Jasper hasn't made an appearance yet so we're both happy about that. We know it's going to happen eventually. There's no avoiding it. But we're going to worry about that day when it comes. I don't want Alice to even think about it. Not when she's finally in a state where she's ecstatic to wake up every morning. She says she has me to thank for that and naturally that causes my heart to burst. When she was in LA with Jasper, she told me that she'd pray to herself every morning that today would be the day that _something_ would change, and every night she would go back to bed in the same situation... living with a douche bag who has some serious mood swings and needs to be locked away in the Wacky Shack or something...

Alice's progress is amazing. Being around her friends and family has helped immensely with that. I can see the light that I've missed so much has returned to her eyes every time she looks at me. The light that dimmed over the past 5 year is now burning brightly... the way I remembered it and the way it should be. She has that extra dance in her step like she had when we were in high school and always together... before Jasper changed and ruined her. The brilliant glow that would radiate from her has found it's way once again. Her dazzling smile that could bring anyone with eyes to their knees is permanently attached to her gorgeous face that now has so much love and happiness.

She's back to the Alice I know and love with all my heart. More importantly.... she has her life back.

And I've made it my duty to make sure she _never_ loses it again.

I see how she is now, she's like an angel sent straight from heaven. An angel who lost her wings over the hard, unfair years... and with my help, we've both collected the feathers off the ground and they're now resting on her shoulder again like they should be. Every time I look at her I want to cry cause of how beautiful she is. Inside and out. I want to cry at the memory of how broken she was that rainy night when she revealed to me why she left and never returned or called.... and to see how she is now, it's just a beautiful transformation. I never want to see her that broken or weak again. It hurts way too much.

She's my best friend and I love her, so I'll do whatever it takes to keep that smile on her face.

...

"Bella, sweetie, you've been at it for about 30 minutes now. I don't think it's going to get any bigger than that."

I bite down on my lip trying to hold in a laugh, but I can't do it, "That's what she said!"

After a few seconds the joke clicks in Alice's head and she laughs too, "Very mature."

"You know me, I'm the poster child for maturity.", I strike some crazy pose and Alice fills the cool night air with her contagious giggles. I smile brightly, enjoying the sound.

"Just come snuggle with me!", she looks so cute when she gets all frustrated.

"What's the magic word?", I ask with a teasing smirk.

"Now.", she shoots back with a glare... and I'm not too sure if it's meant to be taking seriously or as a joke.

"I will accept that as the magic word.", I throw one last log on the fire before walking over to Alice and sitting with her on the blanket that's spread on the ground.

I was so determined to have it burning big, but I guess the logs are too wet.

Alice pushes me to lay down on my back and she forms her body into my side, resting her arm lazily across my middle.

It's nice. Just enjoying her company and the feel of her so close. No words are needed, all I need is Alice beside me.

Over the week we've only been alone a couple times and it wasn't for long. So we decided to escape from our friends tonight. Wasn't that hard since Emmett and Rosalie were spending the evening together, Carlisle and Esme are both at work, Edward and Jacob are at Charlie's house watching some game, and I'm not too sure what Ashley is doing. She might be studying.

We just wanted to make sure that we were somewhere where no one could ruin our time together. Which is why we're out in the woods sitting in a meadow we stumbled across when we were younger. We were so excited when we found it, like we found a lost city or something. Sure we got our asses chewed out by our parents for running off in the woods and not coming home before night fall like we were suppose to, but it was worth it. We found a place that's ours. So that makes it special...

The memory brings a reminiscent smile to my face...

"Hey, Alice. You remember when we were 11? when we found the meadow?"

"Remember how long my mom yelled cause we were late getting in?"

I chuckle at her scrunched up face as she remembers the day, probably hearing how loud Esme was again.

"How can I _not_ remember that? I didn't know Esme was even capable of getting that loud.. ya know, since she's so soft spoken and everything."

"Well, I'm pretty sure on that day she could be heard a couple states over."

Our laughter fades back into the silent night. I listen to the crackle of the fire as Alice's fingers stroke random patterns on my arm and bringing up goosebumps. I pull her closer into me and wrap my arms around her, holding her securely. While I run my fingers slowly through her short raven hair, Alice places a series of soft kisses along my neck...

"I love you, Bella", she whispers against my skin, sending a jolt right through me.

"Love you more", I kiss her forehead and she sighs, completely at ease. It warms my heart when I see how peaceful she looks after I tell her I love her. It's no secret that's for sure, but when I tell her, she reacts as if it's being said for the first time.

Alice reaches for my hand, connecting our palms and lacing our fingers together... perfect fit.

The ring that's on her finger seems to be glaring at me as it reflects the light from the dancing flames. It doesn't deserve to be there.

I look away towards the fire, letting our joined hands fall apart. I know without looking that Alice is probably feeling a little hurt that I broke the contact. It's that fucking ring's fault though. I understand that Alice wants to wear it so no one asks questions. She wants to be able to end it with Jasper in person, in Forks. And I'll be at her side ready to kick him in the balls so hard they come up through his mouth.... well, we haven't really decided on that part yet. Hell, I'll do it anyway.

She said she wants to come up with a lie to explain to everyone why she divorced him so she doesn't have to tell the truth. She's so ashamed of it she doesn't want anyone to know how weak she was. I told her that's not her fault and that there was nothing she could really do, but that never does any good. Every time I think about it I get so upset with myself that I wasn't able to rescue her from it... but there's no point in grieving over it now. That was the past and Alice wants to live completely in the future. With me.... like it should've been.

"I got your letters."

Alice's words pulls my gaze away from the fire and back to her, "Wh-what?"

"Your letters. The ones you sent me when... well, you know."

I get up off my back and sit with my legs crossed, staring at her intensely with my mouth opening to say something, but she beats me to it as she sits up too...

"I found them in Jasper's study one day when he was at work. I'm sure you can imagine how furious I was that he didn't let me see them, but then again it didn't surprise me...."

If its even a little close to how furious I am now, then she was very, _very_ pissed.

"So I spent that whole afternoon reading them... I read and replied to every single one, Bella."

"Why didn't you-"

"Send them back?", she finished for me, "because... I was afraid of what might happen if he found out.", She looks away from me as she pulls at a loose string on the blanket, "I know it's stupid..."

"No. It's not. There's something seriously wrong with him, like he has a trigger in his head that goes off at random moments. One side is the guy you first met, even though he was still a total douche bag in my eyes, and with one switch you get the crazy,overbearing -I-should-be-in-a-padded-cell-with-other-psychos-who-have-access-to-large-guns-and-knives", I said the last bit in one long drag while using my hands to get my point across.

She laughs a little even though she knows all too well I'm being serious.

"Alice, seriously, that could've been the day he took it to the next level and hit you... and then I'd be in jail for murder."

"I know.", she says meeting my eyes, "... so since sending them to you wasn't really an option, after I wrote them", she turns to the fire, "I burnt them."

"You _burnt _them? How did you manage to build a fire without Jasper thinking your sending an SOS out to passing airplanes?", I question blankly and at the same time somewhat amused.

"It was one of his good days.", she muttered, "he pretty much forgot about the letters so I didn't have to worry about him going back and looking for them. I told him that I was building a fire to burn some old credit card papers and checks."

I smirk at her lie. Wasn't a bad one actually. I'm impressed.

"I know this is going to sound really dumb and corny but," she looks to her lap with a shy smile, "but I thought that maybe if I burnt them, the ashes would find there way to you and you would know how much I still love you and that I never gave up on us."

When she doesn't hear a response she looks up into my eyes nervously, "Go ahead and laugh."

"You're right. That is pretty corny", I say while trying to smile and hold in the laugh that's tickling my lips.

But when she bursts out laughing I guess it's safe for me so I laugh right along with her.

"Shut up, Bella! You're so mean!", she pushes against my shoulder playfully.

"Actually, I always did feel like there was some hope. That you would come back to me" I tell her after I get all the giggles out, "maybe it did reach me."

"Maybe", she whispers with a smile playing on her face.

I lay back again and she does the same, scooting close to me like before.

"The sky looks so beautiful tonight.", she says in awe. I turn my head to watch her as she looks at the stars that are painted all along the night canvas. Her face is glowing with a child like happiness and it's pulling at my heart strings... I know. I've turned into a real mush ball, but can ya blame me?

"Yea. It's beautiful", I agree without taking my eyes off of her.

"You're not even looking."

"Well, there's something more beautiful beside me."

She turns to look at me and giggles, "Wow, you're cheesy."

"And you're corny.", I point out with a smirk.

The beauty wraps her fingers around the front of my shirt and pulls me into a kiss.

I end it before I get so lost and take her right here in the middle of the woods. She gives me a disappointed smile.

"So, did you bring the marsh mellows?"

I raise an eyebrow and reach behind me, showing a big bag of white, fluffy goodness, "Do you _really_ think I'd forget them? Who do you take me for?"

She snatches the bag from me while laughing...

We spent the rest of the time we were out there roasting marsh mellows... and almost catching the blanket on fire thanks to Alice and her lack of patience. But the kisses that were had afterwards made up for it... even though that left us both wanting so much more.

And I know it's only a matter of time before I give in.

.....

"CHEATER!", Emmett exclaims while jumping to his feet and pointing a finger at me, "C-H-E-A-T-E-R!"

"It's rock- paper- scissors Emmet how can I possibly cheat?!"

He just stands there staring at me as he tries to figure it out. These are the times where I can't help but wonder how he managed to graduate high school.

"Plus if rock is what you pick 98 percent of the time, it's not hard to figure out your next move..."

He's still standin' with that dopey look.

"... which would be rock.", I tell him blankly.

"I'm just surprised he spelled 'cheater' correctly", Alice says from behind her magazine.

I look over towards the couch where she's sitting and she's smiling around the cover at me.

"Whatever. It's a dumb game anyway", Emmett shrugs still annoyed that I kicked his ass. Even if it's a 'dumb game' as he says he still gets all pissy when he loses.

"How 'bout you come up with something to do that doesn't suck then?", I ask while I walk to sit by Alice. As soon as my bottom hits the cushion she slides closer to me.

"I can't. It's just going to be a sucky ass night I guess", He sighs from the kitchen while looking through the fridge.

"So you're going to eat away the boredom?", I ask while I stroke Alice's hair as she reads.

"That's the plan.", he says and then I hear cereal falling into a bowl.

Alice purrs as I massage her temples in a slow, soft circular motion with my finger tips.

"Ya like that, kitty?", I whisper into her ear.

She closes her magazine and sets it to the side no longer interested in it. She turns her body so she's facing me,

"I know of a place where they'd be better suited for.", Every single word laced with pure lust as she stares into my eyes.

I'm pretty sure she heard how loud I gulped... hell, I bet Emmett could hear it from the kitchen.

"Not now", I shake out. "wouldn't wanna give your brother a show. Seeing me sexin' up his sis would most definitely scar him for life."

"Silly Bella, you know I have a bedroom upstairs.", I almost melt into a puddle when I feel her tongue slide over and enter my ear.

I almost tell her, 'yea, the bedroom where you left me alone and naked after our first time', but I bite my tongue. She doesn't deserve that and I'd feel like such a bitch afterwards.

When I don't give her a response she looks away from me and goes back to her magazine, her attitude causing her to flip the pages a little faster than usual.

Alice has been coming on to me with one hell of a force for a while now... and I've turned her down every time.

I know... I'm a fucking idiot.

I'm just afraid. Not really sure why.

I have one side telling me to fuck her brains out, and one side battling the horny devil by telling me over and over to wait for the right time.

But when the hell is the right time??? What if I miss the right time? Will there be a bunch of flashing lights and signs to give me a heads up?

"So what did you and Bella do last night?", Emmett asks through a mouth full of Fruit Loops while walking back into the living room.

"Built a fire. Ate marsh mellows. Talked.", Alice answers, still flipping angrily through the magazine. I'm gonna laugh when she gets a paper cut....

"Oh that sounds fun. Wanna hear what me and Rosalie did?"

"Not really."

Ignoring Alice's rude response, Emmett continues, "We went bowling and then out to eat."

"You went bowling? With_ Rosalie_?", I ask interested. I never thought Rosalie would set foot in a bowling alley again after the 'ball incident'. Long story short, Rosalie got her fingers stuck in the holes of the ball and almost went down to meet the pins with it. That was an interesting night. She didn't talk to Alice for a week after that cause instead of helping like the rest of us, Alice was sprawled out in the middle of the floor laughing so hard I thought she was going to need another pair of panties.... and that would've made the night even more hilarious.

I hear Alice snort a laugh from behind her magazine.

"Ya know what else is crazy? It was her idea.", Emmett says and then gets up to put his empty bowl away.

"Did Rosalie get lost on her way to the bathroom? She's been gone for a while.", I point out. Our conversation made me realize how long she's been gone.

"I don't know", Emmett walks to the hall and calls out, "Hey Rose! Did you fall in the toilet?"

A few seconds later Rosalie's slightly annoyed voice is heard, "NO. On my way out I got a phone call."

"We thought we were gonna have to call in a search party.", I joke when she joins all of us in the living room.

"Hey Alice, is your phone dead or something?", Rosalie questions.

"No, I left it up in my room. Why?"

"Because Jasper just called me saying that he couldn't reach you."

At the sound of his name I quickly glance towards Alice, watching as her pale face becomes almost translucent. Her magazine falls out of her grasp and her hands drop to her side on the couch.

I press our thighs close together so I can squeeze her hand without being noticed.

"Oh..wh- why did he call?", she asks distantly.

My eyes are on Rosalie. Please don't say he's on his way. _Please_.

"He was just checking in to see how everything is"

Psh. Like he really gives a rats ass.

"Is he on his way to Forks?", I ask trying to sound casual and not like the answer is a bomb waiting to drop and destroy everything.

"No. He said that work is still pretty hectic. He's not sure when he'll be able to come."

I feel my insides unknot themselves.

"Are you okay, Tink?", Emmett asks concerned.

"What? Oh, yea... fine. I'm just gonna go upstairs."

I jump to my feet and follow Alice to her room leaving behind a confused Rosalie and Emmett.

I see the tears forming in Alice's eyes when we enter her room.

"Alice.. don't.", I rush to her, wrapping my arms tightly around her as she clings to me. "Everything is going to be fine."

"Bella I got so scared.", she says quietly into the crook of my neck. "I thought he was..."

"He's not coming. Not yet. So don't worry.", I rest my forehead against hers as she looks in my eyes, "We have to be strong, baby. And when he does show up, I'm going to be right there with you. _Nothing_ is going to happen. I promise."

She nods her head okay as her lip quivers.

"I love you.", I tell her before giving her a soft kiss. "We're gonna be okay."

We layed in bed and talked for an hour or so. I left, with a little trouble because it's so hard to resist Alice, after I made sure she wasn't still shaken up over Jasper's 'check in'.

I'll be back in her arms first thing tomorrow....

......

**Review! Please & thank you!**


	10. Tired of Being Strong

**WOOOO NEW CHAPTER! **

**thanks to those of you who reviewed the last chapter and thanks SO much to all of you who have had something to say every chapter =) I love you all! You guys are my motivation!**

**Don't be afraid to say something guys! I promise I wont bite ;)**

**Okay, the end of this chapter crosses into the "M" territory . so you've been warned!(it's going to suck too-_-)**

**.......**

_***3 DAYS LATER***_

Where the hell are my running shorts?! I know they're around here somewhere. Clothes just don't get up and walk away... unless the closet monster decided to come out the closet and eat the clothes I have all over my floor....

I laugh to myself at the thought of the closet monster_ coming out_ of the closet... okay I'm probably the only person who would find that funny.

A knock on my door stops my search. I wonder who that could be. It's like 8 in the morning.

"Alice", I say a little surprised when I open the door, revealing Tinkerbell's long lost hotter sister.

I should've known if anyone would show up at my door this early it would be her. We've pretty much been inseparable... except for at nights of course.

"Good morning, Bella.", She greets with a bright smile.

She's wearing a pair of dark jeans that fit like a second skin, black boots, a black leather jacket, and I think a white tank top is underneath.

It's so simple and she looks_ so_ beautiful.

"Are you gonna let me in or am I suppose to just stand here?", she asks with an amused grin.

"Oh! Sorry. Yea come on in."

She walks in when I move out of the way. I hate when I get so caught up in eye fucking her. I forget everything... like how to form words.

"You look rather spiffy for such an early time of day.", I tell her while shutting the door. "Why is that?"

"What? A girl can't get dressed up to come see her best friend?"

"Well.... yea I guess she can."

She laughs and takes off her jacket then throws it on my messy bed, "I'm actually surprised you're awake. I thought I'd show up at your door and be out there for at least 4 more hours."

"I can still kick you out and make you wait if you want?", I joke.

I knew that would wipe the smile off her face, "Not funny. What if I got kidnapped?"

"They'd bring you back. Don't worry."

"What's that suppose to mean?", she questions while narrowing her eyes at me and putting her hands on her hips. It's so damn cute.

"Nothing.", I smirk while continuing the search for my lost shorts.

"So, what do you have planned for today?", she asks while twirling her 'BFF' necklace around her finger and taking a seat on one of the few chairs I have.

"Right now I'm looking for a pair of shorts to go running in, and then I have to go to work tonight at 9. I'm probably going to visit Charlie before work too. I talked to him on the phone the other night and he said he wants to have dinner with me some time this week."

"Oh... well damn. I was wanting to do something with you", I don't have to look up from the pile of clothes I'm looking through to know she's pouting.

"Awe, don't be like that. If you want you can come with me to see Charlie."

"Do you think he'll mind?"

"Of course not. He'll be happy to see you", I turn to face her after not seeing my short in the clothes pile. "You know he-... you're sitting on my shorts."

Alice looks up from playing with the ring I wear to work that has a bottle opener on it, "huh?"

"My shorts. The ones I've been looking for. They're under your butt.", I tell her annoyed that I didn't see them over there before.

She looks down confused and sees the shorts poking out from under her.

"Oh", she says simply and tosses them my way. "My butt says sorry."

I catch them with a raised eyebrow, "Your butt is forgiven."

She sends a smile my way and I walk into the bathroom to change.

"You know you don't have to change in there", she reminds me when I return.

"I know. I just think it's the better thing to do.", I tell her while pulling my hair into a ponytail.

"Afraid I might attack you?"

Even if her question was meant as a joke, it still left me a little uncertain of what to say, "No... I just did it out of habit."

I sit down on the edge of my bed to put my shoes on, concentrating on tying the laces so I wont look over at Alice.

"Well, you should be afraid."

I glance up from my feet to see Alice stalking sexily over to me. Oh god.

My face heats up, turning a bright shade of red like I wasn't allowed to look. I try to force my eyes away but they're glued to her.

"I just might have to _attack_.", she says while straddling my lap. My heart is beating so fast right now it might fly right out of my chest.

"I want you, Bella.", her husky whispers against my ear causes me to moan into her neck. I feel her smile against my hot skin. She knows what she's doing to me and she loves it.

A jolt is sent right to my core when Alice starts grinding against me. I watch as she bites down on her lip, trying to contain her moan. She's so fucking sexy.

I am SO glad I don't have a dick. Because it would be proudly standing straight up right now.

My face is probably giving away the fact that I have a girly boner though.

"Am I turning you on, baby?", she breathes out after trailing her tongue along my jawline.

"Uhh-hh.. I.. n-no.", I manage to say while she speeds up rocking our centers together.

"Oh really? Try saying it again without stuttering.", she smirks. Oh she's loving this. And fuck so am I.

Heat rushes to my already throbbing center when Alice holds onto my arms and leans back in my lap, arching her back and moaning when she slowly pulls back up. Can she get any sexier???

She. Is. KILLING ME.

"Alice", I groan out, attacking my lips to her exposed collar bone and shoulders. I feel her place a hand on the back of my head, running her fingers through my hair as she lets her head fall back and enjoys the feel of my lips on her skin.

I stop my anxious fingers from pulling her top off. Why? You should know by now. Because I'm an IDIOT.

"Don't", she whimpers out when she feels my hands and lips coming to a stop.

I stand up with her in my arms, turning around to set her on the bed and backing away.

"Bella.."

"No. I'm uh.. I'm gonna go running now.", I stammer out while running my fingers through my hair, trying to get myself back under control.

Before she has time to say anything I grab my ipod, phone, and walk out the door, leaving it open and leaving Alice sitting on my bed.

.....

I decided to just walk to the park where I like to run instead of driving there...

Well, I left my car keys at home and I sure as hell wasn't walking back in my house to get them. How embarrassing would that haven been? _'Sorry about that, Alice. After my 'dramatic' exit I left my keys so I came back for them... BYE!'_... No. That wont fly.

So... hence why I'm _walking_.

Plus it'll take me a little longer to get there and I'll be able to clear my head.

I really hope she isn't upset with me. I shouldn't have left the way I did, I know that. But I had to get out of there.. and if she is upset she has every right to be.

There's a better way of telling someone you're not ready... but what did I do? I jumped up and ran out of the fucking apartment like the moron that I am. Not a good way of letting someone know it's not the right time. Not a good way at all.

Once I reach the park I look around realizing what a nice morning it is. The weather is nice and cool. The sun is actually shinning somewhat brightly. There's not that many people here either which doesn't surprise me. Not many people like to get up early to run.

While I stretch my legs I see Jessica, a girl I went to high school with. We weren't really close friends. She was just someone I'd talk to in the classes I didn't share with Alice or any of the others from our tight little group. She was nice enough though.

When she jogs past she waves and gives me a smile. I do the same.

I take my ipod out of my pocket and play, "What's Left of Me", by blessthefall.

After putting my earbuds in I start off down the track. Letting the music carry me along...

_Don't let your eyes go shut on me._

_I won't let your voice be silenced, SILENCED._

_Blood is seeping from my hands  
_

_Tell me, Is this what you wanted?  
_

_I'm the one that walked away  
_

_For me, it's all that I needed_

The ascending guitar and the intensity of the song pulls my legs faster...

_  
With nowhere to turn, I'll find truth_

_Only with you  
_

_What's left of me is yours to keep_

_  
WHAT'S LEFT OF ME IS YOURS_

_Only with you_

_What's left of me is yours to keep_

_WHAT'S LEFT OF ME IS YOURS_

_OH!_

I come to a slow jog when I feel my phone vibrating in my pocket. It's a text...

**"Bella I'm so sorry for how I behaved earlier. It's just getting harder and harder to hold back. I'll see you at Charlie's tonight unless you don't want me to go anymore..."**

**Call: Alice**

While jogging I send a reply...

**"No need to apologize. I shouldn't have reacted the way I did. And yes, I will see you at Charlie's."**

**Call: Bella**

Right when I hit the 'send' button, I look back up and in that moment I get knocked from my feet and my back meets the earth....

I ran into a fucking tree.

I hold my eyes shut trying not to let the pain that's burning through my back and skull get the best of me. But ooooh that fucking hurt!

"Oh my god, Bella!", I'd know that accent anywhere. Plus, how many British people are in Forks?

My eyes open and I look to my left, Ashley is jogging over to me...

"Are you alright?", She asks a little out of breath from running and concerned for me.

"Uh.. yea. I think... maybe.", I grab the hand she's holding out and she helps bring me to my feet. "As long as a person isn't capable of dying from embarrassment, I should be okay."

"That looked like it really hurt, "She says wincing.

"It_ really_ did. Let this be a lesson, never text and jog at the same time.", I stretch out my back slowly to make sure nothings too fucked up.

She giggles while tucking a few strands of hair behind her ear.

"I'm lucky you were around. Cause it looked like no one else was going to help me up.", I tell her while looking around at the few other joggers who just kinda slowed down and stared when I hit the tree.... jerks.

"Well I do come out here basically every morning. We even use to jog together when we were dating."

"Yea I know. I was there remember?", I smile over at her and she giggles again. Her and Alice have the cutest laughs I've ever heard. Nothing can compete with Alice's though.

We start walking at a reasonable pace around the park. After my little incident with the tree I don't feel much like running.

"So, how are things going with Alice?", Ashley asks, breaking the comfortable silence.

"Uhhh, well, things are... good."

She turns her head to face me, clearly not convinced, "Bella, I've known you long enough to know that you're full of shit right now."

Whoa. Ashley _never_ curses... well, except in bed. And that is SO not the point right now.

"Come on you're like my best friend. You can tell me anything."

Damn her and that accent. There's no way you can go against it!

"Fine.", I give up while letting out a huff of breath. "Alice has been dropping meteor sized hints that she wants to take our relationship to the... very intimate level. And I've turned her down every single time."

Ashley stops walking and then bursts out with laughter. What the hell?

"Ooookay, that's very inappropriate.", I say dryly as I watch her with a raised eyebrow.

She covers her mouth with her hand to try to suppress her laugh, "I'm sorry! It's just-"... and the laughing continues.

"How 'bout you explain what's so funny.", I'm really confused on how she sees the humor in all this.

"You don't remember?", she asks once she gets her laughs to stop, "You did the same thing to me. I had to come on to you _very_ strongly when I wanted to take things to a more sexual level."

"Ha, oh yea... the night I finally gave in was the night I walked into my apartment and you were laying naked in my bed."

Ashley's face turns scarlet red while she looks around us to make sure no one heard, "You didn't have to say it out loud... I was there remember."

I smirk at the fact that she quoted me from earlier.

She clears her throat and shoves her hands into her pockets, wanting so much to have the conversation back on me and Alice and not on our nights of 'naughtyness',

"My point is that you were afraid to open up to me after Alice left... you were afraid that I'd leave you. Like she did.", she says the last part quietly, not wanting to bring up the past. But it was necessary to get her point across.

"You're scared of being rejected, Bella.", she tells me sadly, "But I honestly don't think she'd do it again."

Ashley is right. Like always. When I first started dating her it took a while for me to consider being sexually involved with her. I didn't want a repeat of the ending I had with Alice on that night. The night that started out the best of my life, but ended the worst. It's kinda funny in a messed up way when you think about it.

But something in me changed on the night me and Ashley made love for the first time... it could've very well been the fact that her beautiful body was exposed to me on my bed, I think there was something more though. Like in that instant I trusted her with my body and soul and I knew she would never hurt me...

And that's how it's going to be with Alice. I'll finally know when it's the right time.

"I know she wont do it again. I_ really_ know she wont. It's just a fear I have in the back of my mind that refuses to go away. No matter how badly I want to throw her down and rock her freakin' world- aaaaannnnnddd this is very awkward isn't it?", I ask suddenly becoming very uncomfortable with the direction this little talk is going in.

"Maybe a little", she says with a nervous laugh.

Talking to your ex about having sex with someone else is never a good time. Plus I don't want to offend Ashley or upset her. Not after everything she's done for me.

"You and Alice will be okay though. You'll know when the perfect moment is and things will just... happen.", she says simply as if she truly knows it'll work out that way. And hell she's more than likely right.

"Thanks, Ashley. I don't know what I'd do without you." I tell her honestly.

"You wouldn't know how to survive.", she laughs.

I smile and pull her into a tight hug. It's comforting to know that I'll always have Ashley in my life...

......

I look at my phone to check the time. It's 6:32. So that means I'll be able to have a good visit with Charlie before work.

After taking a shower, putting on some clothes, doing my hair and makeup as quick as I could and have it still lookin' good, I'm now in my truck and on my way to my dad's.

When I pull in the driveway I see Alice parked to the side of the road. She gets out when my hunk of junk comes to a screeching hault.

"Hey", she greets shyly while walking over. I guess she's still a little worried about how things went this morning.

"How long have you been waiting in your car?", I ask after showing a smile, silently telling her that everything is fine between us.

"Just a little over 10 minutes. I didn't want to go in without you."

"Well I'm here now so lets... go in.", I say while motioning to the house.

She giggles at my lack for better words and we walk to the door.

I knock a couple times, looking questioningly towards Alice when I hear the sound of the oven slamming shut and something dropping loudly on, I'm guess the table?

We both laugh quietly to ourselves when shortly after Charlie is heard cursing out, "GAH, that's fucking HOT!"

"I'd knock again but I'm kinda afraid to.", I whisper down to Alice and she laughs louder.

When the door swings open we quickly wipe the amusement off our faces and stare at Charlie blankly. It's probably a little creepy looking if you were in his shoes.

"Hey you two. Dinner might be a little, uh,.. late." By lookin' at him you'd think he was in there fixing dinner for a group of 50.

The smell of burning_ something_ is lingering through out the house...

"_You_ tried to _cook?"_, I ask dumbfounded as I walk through the door and into the kitchen with Alice close behind me.

"Well, I wanted to try and have something nice ready when you got here.", he says a little embarrassed when I see the burnt slab on the kitchen table.... we were suppose to eat that?

"Uhhhh, it was a nice attempt... but I like knowing what I'm eating." I grimace while poking the unidentifiable object with a fork... the fork didn't even penetrate it.

I glance over at Alice and she's standing behind Charlie by the fridge trying not to be polite and not laugh.

"It was suppose to be meatloaf.", Charlie squints down at it like _he's_ not even sure anymore. "How about I just call in for something?"

"Sounds good.", I say relieved that I don't have to eat the 'meatloaf'.

Once the pizzas were delivered we pretty much killed them and then talked in the living room. Charlie asked me how Ashley was and I told him we were no longer dating but still good friends. Of course he was shocked and disappointed. Like the others he thought me and Ashley were going to be that couple that lasted through it all. He didn't question why though so I was very happy with that. It's getting harder to keep track of all the lies and made up reasons I've been telling everyone. He and Alice were a little rocky with conversation at first. I guess he's still a little sore about how she left... but once he saw that I was completely over it and that everything between us that happened that day(Well, the bad things that happened) is in the past, he warmed up to her again and now it's like she never left... like it should be.

.............

"Can I get a Bud Light?", some guy asks loud enough to be heard over the music.

"You sure can.", I tell him while heading over to where the beer is kept and returning back with a bottle.

I let him watch as I open his beer and slide it over to him. I refuse to open one for a customer unless they're watching. I don't want them to think I slipped something into their drink cause that happens way too much already and I don't want it happening where I work.

He nods his bottle towards me saying 'thank you' and takes a big swig while returning to his table.

It's pretty busy tonight. I've been working up a sweat running back and forth to get peoples orders. Even though I can handle it all by myself(Cause I'm awesome.), I'm glad I got some extra help..

I watch as Angela, the new worker and my help, handles the opposite end of the bar. She's doing really good for a new girl. Usually it can be really overwhelming, but if she is overwhelmed she's not showing it. She's just one of those people who can keep their cool under hectic situations though. Just like how she was in high school. The model student.

"Vodka on the rocks and you better make it snappy!"

I stop admiring Angela and turn, ready to bitch out the customer who apparently thinks they have the right to order me around. My face quickly turns into a smile though when I see Rosalie, Emmett, Edward... and Alice.

"Oh. It's just you. You're lucky. I was prepared to throw down!"

They all start laughing knowing that if it really was someone else they would've met my fist...

"Seriously though, vodka on the rocks please." Rosalie says, flashing a smile after the 'please'.

I roll my eyes and smile to let her know I'm playing.

After I pull out a glass and throw some ice cubes in it, I take the vodka bottle and flip it around before splashing some on top of the ice.

"Show off.", Rosalie smirks.

After filling the glass I hand it to her while sticking out my tongue.

"You should put that away... someone might come along and suck it.", Alice says while licking her lips after Rosalie walked off with Edward and Emmett to find a table.

"That a promise?", I challenge her.

"Oh you bet.", she says while wiggling her eyebrows.

"So, why are you guys here?", I ask trying not to focus on my twitching center.

"Emmett said 'Dude, Where's My Guitar?', is playing tonight. So we thought we'd come see them and visit you."

I totally forgot they planned to play, "Oh that's cool. They're pretty awesome."

A girl that most definitely has reached her quota shoulders her way through the crowd around the bar and stumbles up to it, knocking into Alice in the process.

"Another martini pleeeeeeeease.", The alcohol is so strong on her breath you could probably get buzzed just by breathing the same air as her.

"Sorry, sweetie. I think you've had enough."

"Awwweee, how 'bout you give me one more...", she leans over onto the bar(not gracefully I might add), and whispers, "and _you_ can be the one to drive me home."

You can practically see the steam coming out of Alice's ears when she hears the girl's offer. She must've been listening really closely to hear it.

"Uh, excuse me, but that's _my_ girlfriend and _you're_ going to have to take a bus home."

Did she say_ girlfriend?_ I know that's what we are, but this is the first time she's said it out loud and I can feel the blush coming.

The shocked look on the poor girl's face is priceless. She's so afraid little 'ol Alice is going to kick her ass.

"I- I didn't know she was your-"

"Yea, well now ya know.", Alice says curtly.

The girl just backs away from the bar and disappears into the crowd.

Once she's gone Alice turns to face me, an innocent smile plastered to her face.

"Haha, do you know how hot you are when you get jealous?", I ask.

"I imagine... very?", she says with a cocky smirk.

"Pretty much."

"Bella! We SO need your help!", Dean(One of the guitarist of the band) yells out desperately while running over to the bar.

"Why?", I know what he's probably going to ask... I can feel my palms sweating already.

"We need you to sing!", I knew it, "Zac is in the bathroom barfing because he drank too much and we're about to start. Please, PLEEEEEASE!"

"Uhm...", usually I don't get nervous, but the fact that tonight's crowd is rather large _and_ Alice is here makes me want to run in the bathroom with Zac.

"Please Bella! Just sing and play guitar for ONE song and then you can stop!"

"I..",

"Please, please, please, please, please, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLE-"

"FINE! I'll do it!", I say just to shut him up. I steal a glance at Alice and she's smiling brightly, "But I get to pick the song."

"That'll be great! As long as it's one we've practiced enough.", he runs back to the stage to tell the rest of the band that they have a replacement.

I can't believe I agreed to this. What if I get up there and suck?

"Everyone can I have your attention?", I hear Dean say into the mic. The crowd turns towards the stage. "Tonight we're going to have a new singer up on stage because Zac is well... unavailable", he glares over at the bathroom where Zac probably has his head in a toilet. The crowd laughs., "So give it up for the awesome Inferno bartender, BELLA SWAN!"

He just _had _to do an introduction. I might have to kill him.

Some of the crowd turns to face the bar, waiting for me to walk up on stage.

I feel Alice's hands pushing into my back trying to get me to move, "Go Bella! You're going to do great!"

My feet finally start to move as I make my way to the stage. I turn to look over my shoulder one more time at Alice and she gives me an encouraging smile.

With every step up to the stage I let out a deep breath. I grab the guitar I play when I practice with them and put it around my shoulder, letting it sit low on my torso.

I can hear the ringing in my ears from my nerves as I look over the many faces that make up the large crowd around the stage.

"Uh, what's up?", I ask into the mic.

"You rock Bellaaaaa!", I hear a distant voice from somewhere in the middle of the crowd.

"So do you Emmett.", I say embarrassed.

The crowd laughs at Emmett's outburst and my response.

"Uhm, well, I really hope you've all drank enough so you wont be able to tell if I suck.", The crowd laughs again and I laugh a little too, growing a little more confident as I stand up here.

I walk away from the mic to tell the other guys on stage with me what we're going to be playing.

"Kay, this is "Hemorrhage", by Fuel. Hope we do it justice."

And with that the crowd starts clapping and cheering us on as the band starts up...

We fade out and all you can hear is Dean picking the notes cleanly. I look over to him and he smiles.

I turn back to the silent crowd and start singing...

_Memories are just where you laid them_

_Drag the waters till the depths give up there dead_

_What did you expect to find_

_Was there something you left behind?_

_Don't you remember anything I said when I said..._

As I'm searching the crowd my eyes finally land on the angel I've been looking for... Alice.

I places my fingers over the appropriate frets and strum the chords softly...

_Don't fall away_

_And leave me to myself_

_Don't fall away_

_And leave love bleeding_

I kick in with the distortion as the band plays along with me for the chorus while the crowd gets loud. All I can see though is Alice as she watches me intensely...

_In my hands, in my hands again_

_And leave love bleeding in my hands_

_In my hands_

_Love lies bleeding_

My confidence builds while I strum and feed off the energy of the crowd. I let go of my guitar and hold onto the mic stand while I sing the second verse, putting all my emotion into it...

_Oh, hold me now I feel contagious_

_Am I the only place that you've left to go?_

_She cries her life is like_

_Some movie black and white_

_Dead actors faking lines_

_Over and over and over again she cries!..._

I strum my guitar with attitude as the band picks back up for the second chorus and the rest of the song. Dean sings background with me while he rocks out...

_Don't fall away_

_  
And leave me to myself_

_Don't fall away_

_And leave love bleeding_

_In my hands, in my hands again_

_And leave love bleeding in my hands_

_In my hands_

_Love lies bleeding_

I smile wide at Alice while she's rocking her head along with the rest of the insane crowd...

_And I wanted_

_You turned away_

_You don't remember_

_But I do_

_You never even tried..._

The band fades back out except for the drums and Dean's solo... and at the same time we all strike again to sing the chorus once more...

The stage lights dim once the song ends and the crowd is still going crazy. I don't know if it's the alcohol or if we really were just that good!

"Thank you", I say breathlessly into the mic.

Dean and the rest of the band come up to give me hugs and compliments on a job well done.

I look back into the crowd that has now finally settled down and gone back to socializing and dancing to what the dj is playing... I see Alice walking over to the bar.

After Dean hugs me again and says how thankful he is for saving their asses, I pull my guitar from around me and place it on the stand then jogging off stage to meet up with Alice.

"Bella that was INCREDIBLE!", she says excitedly while throwing her arms around me, "You sounded beautiful."

"Ouch." I hiss out when her hand hits my back in the right spot, reminding me of my running accident.

"What's wrong?", She asks while letting me go quickly. "Did I hurt you?"

"No _you_ didn't, but a tree picked a fight with me earlier", I explain, "It was so rude. It just jumped in front of me outta nowhere and made me run into it!"

She laughs and hugs me again, being careful not to touch me in the same spot, "Maybe I should follow you home to make sure you don't have any crazy groupies waiting for you."

"What about the others?". And by others I mean Rosalie, Emmett, and Edward.

"I guess they'll eventually figure out we're no longer here.", she says with a smile.

"Oooookay then."

I grab my keys and we head for the exit, hand in hand.

.......

I pull my keys out of my apartment door with some extra effort needed because the freakin' key sometimes gets jammed.

"Did you have fun tonight?", I ask Alice after we walk in the room, shutting the door behind me.

"Yes. You were absolutely awesome. I know I've said that like a million times already.", she chuckles.

"It's good to hear though.", I point out.

She examines my apartment, "Well, I see no groupies... I guess I'll go then."

"Don't", I blurt out causing her to take her hand off the door knob.

So many things are running through my mind right now. And all of them revolve around Alice. Beautiful, loving Alice. My talk with Ashley opened my eyes to a lot of things. She helped me understand where that fear that always stopped me from getting closer to Alice came from. One thing is clear now... that fear is gone.

And tonight I don't want Alice to leave.

I quickly close the distance between us, taking her face in my hands and kissing her passionately.

Once her shock wears off, she starts kissing me back. Her fingers slide through my long dark hair while our lips cushion each others.

"Bella..."

I rest my forehead against hers and stroke my thumbs against her flawless cheeks.

"I'm tired of being strong.", I whisper against her lips. "I want you, Alice. Always."

A tear rolls down her cheek as she beams up at me. I kiss away the tear and trail down her jaw to meet her lips once again.

"I love you _so_ much.", she breathes out between our soft kisses.

I take her hands in mine, "I love you...", I stop kissing her to look down at our hands when I feel cold metal, "... too."

She follows my gaze down... to the ring. The ring that has mocked me so many times. She releases our hands and backs up a little while holding her left hand in her right. Examining it closely...

Alice looks up into my eyes. It worries me that I can't read what's in hers.

"Fuck it.", she mumbles out while pulling the ring off her finger and throwing it over her shoulder.

The sound of it clinging to the floor is heard as Alice runs into my arms, pressing our bodies and lips together.

I smile into our kisses, so happy that the ring is somewhere other than her finger. It wouldn't have stopped us from getting intimate, but knowing that it's gone will make all of this so much sweeter.

I quickly pull Alice's top over her head, throwing it to the floor with mine following after it. Our lips become magnetic while Alice fumbles with the zipper on my jeans. I kick them off and to the side and work on hers.

My heart starts beating faster as I take in Alice wearing nothing but her black thong with matching bra. I run my eyes over her gorgeous pale body, her lovely cleavage, toned stomach, long beautiful legs... I'm getting wet just imagining what I haven't seen in 5 years.

As if reading my mind Alice reaches behind her back to unclasp her bra and tossing it away, letting her beautiful breasts bounce free. I lick over my lips while she pulls her thong down her legs and walks out of them over to me.

So fucking gorgeous. My memory is nothing compared to the real deal standing in front of me. I shift around in my standing position trying to get some kind of friction going between my legs.

Once she reaches me her lips touch mine for a quick peck but she depends it when my hands run down her bare back and to her ass, squeezing our bodies together.

I want out of this fucking bra and underwear so we can have skin to skin contact.

She moans into my mouth while she pushes us together as much as she can. Like she's trying to form our bodies.

I wasn't even aware that we were walking backwards until the back of my legs hit the bed and we crash down onto it tangled together.

My eyes roll into the back of my head when I feel her grinding her center into my still clothed one.

"We need to do something about these clothes.", she says dreamily. I nod my head completely okay with the idea.

I lift my butt a little off the bed so she can pull my panties away with ease. She slams back down into me instantly and we both gasp at how amazing it felt to have our hot wet mounds connecting.

"Oh, Bella.", she shakes out with her eyes closed.

"Don't get too lost yet. You have to finish your job.", I chuckle while she quickly catches my drift and removes my bra.

She looks hungrily down at my tits and leans down to take one in her mouth. Her sucking and moaning instantly hardens my nipple. I arch into her mouth while cradling her head, "mmmmm, Alice." She gives my other one attention by scrapping her teeth over and nibbling it, causing me to jerk. "Fuck, Alice!"

"Don't stop saying my name like that baby.", she says in a husky voice that is making me even more wet.

Alice removes her mouth from my breasts and placed them on my lips, pushing her warm tongue into my mouth. While our tongues dance to a beat all their own, I push my thigh against her center and she starts to rock against it, spreading her arousal all around.

"I need you to touch me, Bella.", she whimpers out.

"I'm not going to wake up alone am I?", I ask softly.

My question stops her rocking and she looks deep into my eyes, "No. You're going to wake up in my arms."

That's all I needed to hear. Her breath hitches out of surprise when I flip us so I'm on top. Tonight I'm going to worship her body.

She's in no mood for teasing and I'm just as anxious to have her screaming my name.

So I kiss down her breast, over her stomach and along her thighs. I drag my tongue along her slit and she bucks into my face. I blow on her clit before attacking it with my tongue, using it to paint. Just the taste of her is making me want to explode.

"Bella that's so fucking good.", she sighs out, trying not to squeeze my head with her strong thighs. I stop sucking her pearl and she looks down between her legs at me with a lust glazed glare.

I give her a sexy smirk while licking her juices off my lip. I know I said I wasn't going to tease her, but I couldn't help it.

"Why'd you- Oooooh _fuck_.", her head falls back into the pillow when I shove a finger into her soaking wet entrance.

I let out an animistic groan, "Alice you're so warm and tight."

Another finger is added while I speed up my pace. I can't believe how tight she is, I doubt I'll be able to get another finger in without hurting her. I love how she feels. I love how wet she is... so fucking wet _for me._

I gasp when I feel Alice's slender fingers slide into my own dripping pussy, "Oh god Alice." I moan out while shutting my eyes.

"Don't. I want you to look at me, baby. Look into my eyes.", she pants out. I do what she says and I stare into her while I ride her fingers hard.

We build up a beautiful rhythm together. I can feel my arousal dripping down her fingers and I know it won't be long... and by the look in her eyes it wont be long for her either.

"You're so beautiful, Bella."

Hearing her say that with so much lust and love is enough to send me over the edge. I push my face into the crook of her neck while I move against her fingers harder and faster. I slam my fingers into her with a force so strong the head board of the bed starts banging frantically into the wall.

"Bella!", Alice gasps as she breaks and I feel her hot sweet cum spurting.

"Oh, FUCK.", I grunt out and then fire works go off behind my eyes as my pussy starts convulsing as I come hard around Alice's fingers.

I breathe heavily against her neck while placing lazy kisses along it. I look back into her eyes as I watch her coming down from her high. The sight is beyond gorgeous.

She whimpers when I pull my fingers out of her warm stickiness. I hope I wasn't too rough with her.

"Are you okay?", I ask

"Yes.... that was _amazing._", she says contently.

I give her a soft kiss before moving to lay by her side. "It was _fucking amazing._"

She giggles and pulls me so I'm snuggled into her arms. I feel her run her nose along the side of my neck and up to my ear where she whispers, "I love you."

"I love you too, angel.", I tell her, suddenly feeling very sleepy.

Not too long after I fall asleep in Alice's arms... where I hope I wake.

...........

**I had some trouble writing this chapter because I was never alone long enough to actually get pulled into it. So I'm sorry if the ending scene was rushed and bad =/ I did what I could do with the time I had.**

**Oh and for the record, the part with Bella running into the tree while texting actually happened to me -_-. So yea, I no longer text unless I know for a fact there is NOTHING in my view that I can hit haha...**

**Thanks for reading and..**

**REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW! =D**

**xxxMeaghan  
**


	11. The Shit Hits the Fan

**I'm sorry this chapter isn't as long as I like to do, but I wanted to get something out since I'll be so busy over the weekend. I managed to find a job just on Saturday's and Sunday's at a hotel... wow that sounds like I'm a prostitute haha. Actually I'll be a maid=p. Not that glamorous but it's something!**

**Thanks for reading and the great reviews! keep 'em comin'!**

**Enjoy:  
**

_**APOV**_

It's 9 am. I've been up since like 7:40... watching the sleeping beauty in my arms. I've memorized every single inch of her gorgeous face just in case God decides to rip me away from her... surely he would not be that cruel.

Both our scents are still mixed in the air. I take in a deep breath letting it fill my noses. Last night was the most amazing night I've ever had. Our first night together holds second place. There was so much love in Bella's eyes last night and that's all I want to see for the rest of my life. I know so many people have expressed that feeling, but it's true. No one can make me feel the way she does... and its been like that since the moment we met at the playground.... Hehe, while watching her sleep I've turned her soft breathing into a song. I'm easily entertained obviously...

I have to pee sooooo bad but I don't want to leave her side. I seriously doubt I could anyway since she has a death lock on me.

My phone is buzzing somewhere and I have no idea where it is. I'm pretty sure it's out of my reach though so I'll just let it keep on buzzin'...

I see and feel Bella starting to stir. She's making her early morning squeaks as she tries to keep her eyes from opening up to meet the day... It's adorable.

"Bella.. Bella. Come back to me.", I whisper into her ear while rubbing soft circles along her bare stomach, trying to coax her into waking up.

"Uhhh, too... early...Alice.", she mumbles while burying her face deeper into my neck. I feel her eyes open against my skin and she pulls back a little to look me in the eyes.

"Surprised to see me?", I ask her with a grin.

"Actually... no.", she replies with a sincere smile.

I lean in to give her a soft morning kiss against her beautiful lips that I love tasting.

"You have bed head", I giggle after we pull apart.

Her hand quickly finds her hair as she tries to smooth it out, "Ooooh not good.", she chuckles, "It could also qualify as sex hair."

"It could be a mixture of both... you still look gorgeous.", I tell her while taking her hand away from her head. I bring her fingers to my mouth, kissing along each finger then bring her index finger into my mouth to suck around it gently.

Her eyes close at the contact and she lets out a soft moan.

"I love that sound.", I tell her in a low sexy voice.

"There was a lot of that going on last night.", she says while biting her lip. She knows when she does that it turns me on... little minx.

"Last night was amazing."

"Well, I do have magic fingers." She says with a cocky smirk while dragging her finger tips along my breasts under the sheets which earns a quick intake of breath from me.

"Not just because of your fingers or your_ very_ flexible tongue... but because of the way you looked at me. I got lost in your eyes and touch last night, Bella."

"I love you so much", she tells me while staring deeply into my eyes... I think I'm lost again.

"I love you too.", I give her another kiss that lasts longer than the last one as our tongues dance together.

"Crap!", Bella pulls away from the kiss and slaps her hand against her forehead, "I was suppose to be at work early this morning to help with inventory."

"... that's a mood killer.", I tell her blankly.

"I'm sorry, babe.", I watch her as she jumps out of bed and starts scanning the room for some clean clothes to throw on, "I'm gonna be in so much trouble. I should have been there 3 hours ago."

"Then there's no point in going now. Stay... with me."

She looks over towards the bed after she pulls her head through her shirt, taking in my naked form with her sheets barely covering me.

I slowly slide my leg up so the sheet falls away, exposing my lower half to her. I grin proudly as I watch her mouth starts to twitch.... worked like a charm.

"I guess you're right. They probably already found someone to help anyway."

"Of course I'm right. Oh, grab my phone before you come back to bed. It's been going off all morning.", I tell her with a dramatic sigh.

"Where is it?", she asks with a scrunched face as she glances around.

"I have no clue. I've just been hearing it."

Bella gets to her knees, bending over to look under the night stand and giving me a nice view of her ass. Mmmmm, I wish I had my damn phone so I could take a picture and save it as my wallpaper.

"Found it.", her hand shoots up in the air with my phone.

She tosses it to me and then crawls back into bed, wrapping her arms around my waist. I sigh happily when I feel her front pressing into my behind.

"Oh shoot.", I say after looking at the 4 missed calls from Rosalie.

"What's wrong?", Bella asks while stroking my thigh.

"I had a shopping trip planned with Rosalie... I guess I forgot.", I close my cell and place it on top of the night stand.

"We both did some forgetting this morning, huh?"

"I guess so.", I giggle, "Then that meeeeeeans _you_ can take me shopping."

Bella's soft strokes come to a stop as the words "you", "take", "me", and "shopping" meet her ears.

I turn around to face her when she gives me no kind of response.

She shakes her head from side to side with a look of pure horror on her face, still unable to make a sound. It's pretty hilarious.

"Oh come on Bella! It's not going to be that bad."

Her head motion grows faster. I'm kinda worried her head might start spinning.

"You're trying to kill me aren't you?", she asks.

I roll my eyes at how silly she's being, "NO...", my lips turn up into a sly grin as an idea pops into my brain, "You might be surprised. You _might_ have a good time."

She laughs dryly and says, "Wrong. I _might_ have a good time putting my head into a tank of fire ants. I _might_ have a good time enduring a series of painful injections I don't need. I _might_-"

I put a hand up to silence her, "Just trust me. You'll have a _great_ time."

A nervous smile crosses her face as she realizes there's no way she's getting out of this....

.......

_**BPOV**_

"The only reason you wanted me to come with you was so you could dump all your many purchases on me.", I mumble but still loud enough for her to hear as I stop walking to get a better grip of her bags.

We've been at this for almost 3 hours and Alice doesn't seem like she's even close to wanting to go home. She pulled me into almost every single store in the mall and bought something from every store we went into...

"I feel like a donkey.", I say as I put her bag from the pet store into the big bag from American Eagle to compact things and make it a little easier to carry while trying to keep up with her as she prances through the mall, "Why the hell did you buy dog toys? You don't even _have_ a dog."

I think Alice has a serious shopping problem... don't they have therapy for this sort of thing?

"It's something nice for Emmett", she shrugs while throwing me a smirk over her shoulder. "We could always get a dog too."

I stop and stare at her, "We?"

She turns around when she realizes that I'm no longer following her and walks over to me...

"Yea... we. I thought that maybe, ya know, if you don't mind", she looks down at her feet and tucks some of her short hair behind her ear, "I'd understand if you didn't want to... it's something we could talk about of course..."

"How can _we_ talk about something when I have no clue what _you're_ talking about?", I ask with a raised eyebrow. What the hell is she on?

A blush covers her cheeks and she giggles at her rambling, "I thought- no, I was _hoping_ that when me and Jasper are officially done that maybe I could... move in with you. That we could live together."

She looks into my eyes and waits for an answer while rocking back and forth on her little feet.

First off, I love how easily she's able to say that douche sack's name now. He hardly even phases her these days... Mainly because she knows how safe she is with me. She knows I wont let anything happen to her.

Second, why is she so nervous about asking me if it's okay that we live together? She should know that she's always welcome. It _is_ what couples in love do.

"Alice, I'd be offended if you didn't move in with me.", I tell her with a grin.

As soon as the words leave my mouth she squeals and jumps into my arms, causing strangers passing us to look... and causing all her bags to fall from my hands.

"Ah, fuck! Now you definitely have to help carry all this.", I say while point a finger over all her stuff.

"Fiiiiine", she says after blowing out a puff of air, "I'm just your slave."

"It's your shit!", I exclaim in a voice that was waaaaay too high for my liking.

She just laughs and skips down the mall in search for the next store to torture me in... I love how she only picked up like 3 bags.

I pick up the remaining bags and quickly trudge against the floor to catch up.

If I didn't look up when I did I would've ran right into her, probably dropping all this crap again. And if that happened it would've been left on the floor and I'd be on my way to my truck...

"Warn a girl the next time you come to a dead stop", I tell her as I steady myself.

"We have to go in this store!" It's a shop dedicated to sexy and skimpy lingerie.

"At least with this store I get to see you in barely anything.", I say growing excited. I'm like a kid in a candy store when it comes to places like this.

"Oh it's going to be a lot better than that.", she takes my hand and pulls me in.

I'm not sure what she meant by that, but it's making me tingle in all the right places.

"Pick me out something. I'll be in the dressing room.", she whispers sexily into my ear and gives it a lick before running off into a room.

I drop her bags to the ground, not even caring what happens to them. The heat between my legs is blocking my brain waves I guess.

It didn't take long for me to find something. I know what I like. So about 2 minutes after she ran off into a dressing room, I walk back to her with a black and red ruffle skirt, complete with G-string, a little red bow on the front, garters, and a bra to match.

"Alice what room are you in?", I ask while swinging the set by the hanger.

"This one", I hear her sweet voice say behind a curtain towards the center of the dressing room.

She sticks her hand out from inside the curtain and takes the lingerie from me. I sit in one of the chairs and wait for her to change.

"Bellaaaaaa, I'm reeeaaadyyyy", she sings. A jolt is sent down my body as I quickly jump up from the chair, waiting for her to emerge.

"Uhhh, Alice? are you gonna come out?", I ask while taking a step closer to the curtain.

Her hand reaches through, grabbing me around the neck of my shirt, and pulls me in. Again I'm very surprised at how strong she is.

"What the-", before I have time to finish my sentence Alice pushes me against the wall and attacks my lips with hers while running her hands all over my body.

"Do you like?", she asks after pulling away and does a little spin to show herself off.

FuuuuuuucccckkkkkkkkkkkkkAH. I more than like. I _love_. I think this outfit(if that's what you wanna call it) was made just for her.

Everything fits perfectly and clings in all the right places. The bra pushes up her tits nicely and I wanna stick my face in them.

Alice spins once more to let her backside face me and wiggles her ass from side to side, "Ya like the bow?", she asks over her shoulder.

I let out a whimper for her answer as the throbbing between my legs reminds me of how horny she's making me.

She looks so sexy and so innocent all at the same time and it's driving me crazy.

"Now, I told you this shopping trip would be worth your time...", she tells me while undoing my belt and pushing my jeans and panties roughly to the ground.

I gasp as the cool air hits my hot center.

"So enjoy baby.", she says softly against my mouth and drops down to her knees.

A loud moan leaks out my mouth as her warm tongue runs up and down my slit, coating it with her saliva and my juices. She stands back up and kisses me hard,

"Sh, shhhh. You have to keep quiet. Wouldn't want to get kicked out now would we?", she smirks and gets back down on her knees.

The thought of getting caught is only turning me on even more. My head leans back against the cool wall as Alice tongue fucks me.

I pull a leg out of my jeans to prop it up on the bench in the dressing room so she can have more room to work.

"Just like that.", I whisper out as my eyes close while stroking a hand through her hair. My hips start rocking into Alice's face, matching the fast darts of her tongue.

The warm buzzing of her moan as she eats me out cause me to buck against her face hard and faster, wanting so much for my orgasm to break through.

I open my eyes to look down at her. She looks up through her eye lashes at me and oh my fucking gosh it's one of the sexiest things...

"Cum for me, Bella." she says into my soaking pussy while latching down on my clit with her teeth.

And with those magic words I feel that special rolling in my stomach as I let go into Alice's mouth.

I cover my own with my hand, trying not to let out a loud moan that might bring one of the workers over to us... that would be very interesting.

Alice removes her face from my center as she licks her lips with a satisfied smile.

She takes my leg that was propped up and guides my foot back into the jean hole. I feel her leave soft kisses all along my thighs as she pulls up my jeans and buttons them back for me.

"Lets go.", she says after giving me a kiss.

"You're getting that though.", I tell her breathlessly while pointing at the lingerie she's wearing.

"Okay.", she laughs.

While she changes back into her clothes I use the time to prepare myself before walking out the dressing room. I don't want it to be obvious that my girlfriend just went down on me.

When we pull the curtain back to walk out, I see a guy sitting in the corner wide eyed and blushing while staring at me and Alice. I bet he never thought that when he came with his girlfriend to pick out something sexy he'd over hear two girls going at it in the next room.

Alice tugs on my arm and drags me to the cash register. She pays for her set while I collect all the bags I dropped earlier. As soon as we exit the store we both burst out laughing.

"I think we gave that guy a boner.", she says through her laughs.

"Ewwwww gross I don't even want to think about that!", I tell her while wrinkling my nose, "He's probably in there jerking it as we speak."

We laugh the whole way to my truck...

......

After we left the mall we decided to stop by her house to visit Emmett... and probably the whole group since we seem to live at the Cullen's house.

"Emmett or somebody please give me a hand!", I call out once I manage to get the door open.

Edward comes around the corner and takes some of the bags out of my hand.

"I'm very surprised you're still alive after shopping with Alice.", he says while carrying the bags into the living room.

"She had fun. Trust me.", Alice said as she winks. I start to pull out things she bought so I can hide my blush.

"Here Emmett this is for you.", she says with an amused grin after tossing the bag from Petsmart over to Emmett.

"A cow with a squeaker?", he looks over to Alice, "You bought me a chew toy?"

"Yea. Have fun!", she smiles.

Edward walks over to Emmett and takes the cow from him, giving it a squeak, "Awe this is perfect for you, Em"

"Very funny.", he snatches it from Edward and squeezes it himself, "Ha, if you push down hard enough it sounds like it's moaning!"

We all just stare at him as he walks out the room with his new toy. I worry about that guy. He can be so smart at times, but fucking dumb at others. I guess it's just the big kid in him. He keeps us laughing though so it doesn't matter!

"Where's mom and dad?", Alice asks to no one in particular.

"I think Emmett said they went out to spend the day together.", Edward answered from the couch.

"So, how are things going with Jacob?", I ask after falling back into the couch by Edward. Alice brought most of her stuff up to her room to put her clothes away. That's a task she likes to do by herself so she knows where everything goes and I'm not complaining at all.

"Very good. Well...", his happy tone falls as something crosses his mind, "I ate lunch with him and his father... he came out to him by introducing me as his boyfriend."

"What did he say?", Billy is pretty old fashion but still also open minded. I mean, he accepted me when I came out as a lesbian....

"Not much... the whole visit was really awkward. It's understandable though."

"I'm sorry.", I tell him sadly, "he'll come around though. It's a lot for some parents to take in."

Hell, Charlie was relieved when I came out. I guess he was happy that he wont have to worry about me getting pregnant. Plus he always complains about how theres only a handful of gentlemen left in the world and the rest have no clue on how to treat a woman..

"Yea. When we told Charlie about how things went he said he would talk to Billy about it.", Edward says with a smile. "Your dad is a great guy Bella."

"He really is.", I agree with a smile of my own.

A knock on the door pulls my attention away from Edward.

"I'll get it!", Emmett calls out.

I hear him exchanging words with someone. I can't tell what they're saying, but judging from the sound of the other person's voice, it's a guy.

Something doesn't feel right. I stand up from the couch to walk over to the door to see who it is...

"I finally have all my things put up.", I hear Alice say from close behind me, "What is it, Bella?"

"Emmett's talking to someone at the door.", I tell her distantly, not taking my eyes from where I hear their voices.

"Who?"

"I don't know. Someone."

Seriously, who's at the freakin' door?

My question is answered when Emmett walks into the living room with a confused look on his face. The man he was talking to walks from around the corner and into the room with the rest of us.

Alice immediately clings to my side with her left hand hiding behind our backs. I reach one of my hands around to hold onto her's.

I can feel my blood boiling as I stare at the intruder, wishing that I had the ability to kill with my eyes. How dare he show up now. _How dare he._

"Hi, sweetie.", he smiles over towards Alice. If she wasn't bracing me I'd be across the room in an instant with my hands around his fucking neck.

"Jasper.", she shakes out.

It's funny how him simply walking into the Cullen living room shattered our entire world....

**So the fucker is in town now! I'm sorry I ended it with a cliffhanger, but it was the best place to stop.**

**Reviews are very welcome =)  
**


	12. Seeing Red

**BOO!..... what the smurf? I just tried to scare you o_o... I know I'm an idiot -_- anyways! I have an update for youuuuuuuuuuu and I hope you liiiiiiiike iiiiiiiiiiit =D. **

**Thanks for the great reviews! Every time I get one I do my little happy dance... which is quite a sight since I can't dance to save my soul haha. I don't care though cause I don't have a problem with making an ass out of myself =p**

**On to the story!:  
**

_**APOV**_

I can only imagine the look of pure shock that's covering every inch of my face. Why now? Why does he have to show up and ruin _everything_? I knew it was going to happen sooner or later... I was just banking on 'later'.

In my perfect world, Jasper would never show up. Like he forgot all about me and decided not to make the trip down here and me and Bella would be able to spend every waking moment together with no worries of someone coming between us to destroy everything we've built.

But unfortunately there is no such thing as a perfect world. I have to live in this one. The world where a man, no he is far from a _man_, has held so much power over me in the past and now he's back to most likely pick back up where we left off...

"Alice, are you alright hunny?", Jasper questions with a look like he's wondering why I'm not running into his arms at the very sight of him.

I feel Bella's grasp on my hand tighten along with the rest of her body at the mention of the word 'hunny'. I steal a glance at her face and it looks like she's trying so hard not to cross the room and choke the life out of him.

Edward, Emmett, and Jasper are staring at me, waiting for an answer while Bella stares down Jasper with a look that could kill. If it's bothering him or if he even notices it he's not showing any concern... how can you _not_ notice when someone is giving you a look as deadly as that though?

"Uh, yea... just a little surprised to see you.", that's one hell of an understatement.

"Good surprise?", Jasper questions with a half smile while taking a step towards me and Bella. As if out of instinct Bella pulls us to take a step back.

"Good is definitely not a word that can be associated with you.", Bella mumbles through clenched teeth.

Jasper finally looks into Bella's eyes for the first time. Like he just noticed she was even in the room. I can't make out his look, but I hope he didn't hear what she said.

"Bella, don't.", I whisper, not wanting to start something even though she probably has absolutely no problem with that.

I hear her let out an annoyed breath. At least she's listening to me....

Jasper clears his throat and focuses back on me, "So, I was hoping that maybe we could spend some time together."

I squeeze Bella's hand so hard my knuckles are probably ghost white just like my face when I saw him walking into the living room.

"Uhhhh..", I look around at the faces in the room, at Edward who looks like he's trying to put something together, at my brother who just looks flat out confused... no surprise there, at Bella... the look on her face is actually scaring me. I've never seen her with so much... rage...

And back at Jasper. The smile on his face is making my stomach turn in a very bad way...

"How 'bout we hang out here?", I suggest with a hopeful tone.

"I meant alone. I've missed you", he tells me... huh, he almost sounded sincere.

My stomach drops. Being alone with him is what I'm most afraid of...

"She doesn't want to be alone with you let alone in the same-"

"Bella.", I place my free hand on her shoulder, reassuring her with a soft squeeze... and to shut her up, "It's fine."

She takes her death stare off of Jasper and her gaze turns into confusion when her eyes meet mine.

"It's fine.", I tell her calmly again, "If my... _husband_", it took a lot of effort to get the word out and I think I might have threw up in my mouth a little bit, "wants to spend some alone time with me.. it's fine."

The look in her eyes is killing me on the inside... but maybe if I just play along like I'm happy to see him, things will continue to go smoothly and I can break it off with no drama... and I hope to god no violence.

I make a move to walk towards him but Bella refuses to let go of my hand.

"No, no... I wont let you do this. Not again.", I hear her whisper desperately.

I turn to look at Jasper and I hold up a finger, silently telling him to give me a second. He nods his head and starts to make conversation with Emmett and Edward while I pull Bella into the next room for some privacy...

"Bella, _please_ calm down baby.", I tell her as my hands cradle her face. I can feel the fire that's blazing under her skin.

"How can you tell me to fucking calm down when you're about to fucking run off with _him?!_ You promised you wouldn't do this.", her last few words are choked out as she tries to hold in hear tears, "... you _promised_."

"I know I did and I'm still keeping that promise. I just have to do this so he doesn't suspect anything... if he doesn't already.", you'd have to be an idiot to not suspect something from the way Bella was behaving out there. But I don't blame her one bit. I'd be doing the same thing if I wasn't the one who has to keep the level head in all this.

My lips touch her forehead and trail down her nose to her own set of delicious lips. I feel her shutter under the touch.

"How will I know if you're alright?", she asks after suddenly pulling apart.

"I'll text you where he takes me."

She shakes her head from side to side, "I don't like this. I don't trust that fucker one bit and if I let you go and something happens to you...", her eyes drop to the floor as a single tear rolls down her cheek.

"Hey..", I pull her chin up to look at me, "Bella, you've been so strong through this whole thing. Now it's my turn. This is something I have to do... and I have to do it alone."

I can feel tears forming behind my eyes but I can't let them show... I have to be strong for Bella now. Just like she's done so many times for me. And if she sees me cry there's no way she'll let me go...

"I love you. You're my girl forever and always", I softly whisper before kissing her once more.

I savor the feel of her lips massaging mine, the way she tastes, the way she moans when my tongue forces it's way through, the warm comforting feel of her tongue wrapping around my own. I know this might be way over dramatic but, I want to remember everything just in case this is the last time I get to kiss her...

We let out a much needed breath that mixes together when our lips part.

"I love you... I don't want to let you go."

Her voice is so fragile, so hurting... it's killing me.

"You just have to.", I don't know what else I can say. This is something we both don't want to do but it's necessary.

We both walk hand in hand back into the living room and it feels like we're walking hand in hand into the mouth of hell...

But with Bella by my side that doesn't sound so bad...

"It's great to see you two are still close", Jasper says, noticing me and Bella's intertwining fingers.

Oh you have no clue just how close we are.

I force a smile while Bella burns a hole right between his eyes with her stare... too bad she can't actually do that.

"So, you ready to go?", he asks once again ignoring Bella.

No. "Yea.", I take a step forward like I'm testing the water... and with Bella's strong hold on my hand there's no way I could drown.

I look over my shoulder at her, giving a soft smile. Hopefully conveying that everything will be fine if she lets go.

Once our fingers drop I instantly feel my body grow cold from the loss of her touch.

My hand that was holding hers quickly find the pocket of my jeans... it's the hand that is suppose to have Jasper's ring on my finger.

I try to get comfortable in the tight hug he's giving me, but it's not possible... he's no Bella.

Spontaneous human combustion is suppose to be something that is extremely rare. Some even say there's no way it could ever happen, but I think Bella is about to prove all those people wrong.

The rage that is igniting inside of her at this very moment could easily cause her to combust right in the middle of the living room.

I want to take her in my arms and tell her that everything is going to be fine, but I know if I do I wont leave.

"Lets get outta here.", Jasper smiles and places his hand at the pit of my back, pushing me along.

"Don't you touch her.", the venom in Bella's voice causes me to flinch almost as much as the feel of his hand on me.

Jasper actually looks scared for a second, but quickly replaces it with a nervous smile as we walk out the door.

It took everything I had not to turn around... I didn't want to see the look on Bella's face.

_**BPOV**_

I stare at the door that Alice and Jasper just walked out of. It's all I can do. I still can't believe she did it. She said it was the best thing to do, but it certainly wasn't the smart thing.

If she did the _smart_ thing she would be in my arms right now while that dog left with his tail between his legs.... no he'd be unconscious because I beat the last breath out of him.

"Soooo, what the hell just happened?", Emmett asks with an arched eyebrow as he looks from the door to me and over to Edward like one of us will have the answer.

Breathe, Bella... just breathe. I close my eyes like that will stop my shaking.

"Seriously, was I the only one who felt like the last 30 minutes were the most awkward of my life?"

"Emmett, shut up.", Edward says distantly. I can feel him staring at me but I can't bring myself to look at him. If I do my eyes will tell him everything.

"Hey, no need to be so harsh", Emmett holds up his hands in a surrendering manner, "I'm just trying to figure out what's going on."

"Well then go upstairs and sort it all out up there", Edward is still looking at me intently.

I hear Emmett mumble something as he makes his way upstairs.

"Bella, is there something you need to talk about?", Edward asks very softly like if he talks louder than his 'inside voice' he might scare me off.

"No.. no everything is..", I place two fingers on each of my temples, trying to push back the extreme headache I feel coming on, "... I gotta go."

Before Edward has time to protest I grab my keys and I'm out the door....

......

Its been about 5 hours since Alice left with Jasper and I still haven't heard anything from her. I've checked my phone a dozen times just in case I didn't hear the incoming of a text.

I'm surprised I haven't paced a fucking trench in the floor of my apartment. It's all I can seem to do though. If I sit still my mind starts wondering over all the bad things that could happen and that only makes me even more anxious to hear from her.

Left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot...

"Fuck this", I mumble before walking into my kitchen. I open the cabinet door that has all my fancy glasses that are collecting dust, and in the top back corner on a shelf all alone is what I'm looking for...

"There you are", I stand on my tippy toes but I'm still not tall enough. My fingers barely graze the cool glass.

I jump a little and my hand locks around the handle and I pull the bottle of Vodka down into my chest.

"Do I really wanna do this?", I ask myself as I run a thumb over the label. I'll most likely wake up with one mammoth size headache, but that's not enough to stop me.

I twist the lid off and then reach for a glass, but then I look back at the bottle and with a shrug I pick up the whole thing and let my lips form against the opening as I quench my thirst...

The warmth of the alcohol slides smoothly down my throat and through my chest as I close my eyes, focusing completely on it.

Once I grab my phone and the bottle I walk outside to sit on my porch. It's so small I don't even think it can qualify as a porch. There's a chair but I chose to sit on the railing.

"Still nothing", I sigh after glancing down on the blank screen of my phone. I wonder what they're doing... NO. I don't want to know that. That's what the vodka is for. I take another small sip and shake a little as it runs through me.

"Hey."

My eyes shoot up and my body starts to relax when I see Edward leaning against the side of the building.

"Edward. You scared the shit out of me."

"I'm glad you don't mean that literally.", he smirks and walks over, sitting next to me on the rail.

I smile weakly at him when he looks down at me.

"How can you drink that straight?", he asks with a look of disgust while pointing at the bottle dangling between my legs.

"Like this.", I answer simply and lifting the bottle up to my lips, letting more flow into my system.

"Now for my second question, why are you drinking? And why alone?"

"Technically that would be a second and third question.", I point out.

He rolls his eyes, obviously not in a joking mood, "Bella I'm being serious. This isn't good for you. I know there's something you're not telling me."

"That's true and I don't plan on telling you.", I hate that I'm coming off as a bitch with him but I can't help it.

"You don't have to cause I already know."

"What do you know?", I ask slowly while looking up to meet his eyes.

"That you and Alice are romantically involved.", he tells me, not taking his eyes away.

My stomach does a cartwheel after he finishes his sentence. Fuck. I always knew Edward was good at putting things together so I don't know why I'm so surprised.

"I pretty much always had a feeling that there was something more to the two of you, and the way you acted earlier when Jasper walked through the door closed the case... Bella why didn't you say anything?", He asks with narrowed eyes.

I look down to the bottle in my hand, "I couldn't say anything. There's a lot more that you don't understand and no one can know."

"Bella you know I wont tell anyone. So why can't I know? I'm concerned for the both of you. I thought we were all best friends..."

"We are best friends. That's why you just have to drop it and promise me that you wont tell anyone what you know. Especially not Jasper.", I look back into his eyes. He looks hurt that I didn't tell him. But this is a secret that I can never tell.

"Please Edward. Promise me.", I hate sounding desperate but dammit I can't help it.

"Okay. I'll promise if _you_ let me take that away from you", he says while reaching for the bottle but not taking it from me. I guess he wants to see if I'll hand it over without a fight. I look down at the Vodka, thinking it over.

"Deal.", I sigh, pushing it towards him.

He smiles proudly at me once the bottle is in his hands. I feel kinda proud myself.

"Well, I came over to see you because I was worried that this was what you would be doing", Edward turns the bottle upside down and lets all the alcohol pour to the ground.

I watch with wide eyes as it splashes up. I can't believe he just did that!

"Oh don't give me that look. This is for the best.", he points out.

"I'm really tired of doing things that are for 'the best'.", I say blankly while doing air quotes.

"Yea but it's for.. the best."

I look at him with a raised eyebrow and we both laugh.

"I'm gonna go so you can get some sleep.", He walks to me and places a kiss on the top of my head. "You know I'm always here if you need me."

"I know. Thank you."

After Edward left I threw myself into my bed, phone in hand. She _still_ hasn't said anything... I might kill Edward the next time I see him for pouring out my vodka.

I feel my phone buzzing in my hand and I quickly pull it open...

Edward is one lucky son of a bitch. It's a text from Alice...

**"We're at the Comfort Inn. Room 209. Sorry I couldn't text you sooner... but don't worry everything is fine. I love you... don't text back."**

**Call: Alice**

The feeling of relief is mixed with a pinch of jealousy and a dash of annoyance. Why the hell couldn't she text me earlier? And why can't I text back? What were or _are_ they doing that is so important I can't reply back?

Okay, calm down Bella. Maybe he's asleep and that's the only way she felt comfortable texting me...

But if that was the reason why can't I fucking say something back??? If he was sleeping it wouldn't matter, right?

I rub roughly at my eye before a tear falls. I'm in no mood to cry.

I toss my phone onto the bed side table and wait for sleep to come...

I'll be able to see Alice soon and everything will be fine.

Everything will be _fine_.

...............

* * *

***FOUR DAYS LATER***

I don't think I've left my bed the past few days...

No joke. The only time I leave is to use the bathroom or to get food and some water and then I'm right back under the covers.

If you're wondering why I'm being so dramatic/lazy, it's because I haven't heard from Alice since she texted me their location. I'm so worried... actually worried isn't the word that can describe how I feel. There isn't a word for this feeling. I hate that I've succumbed to this kind of behavior again...

A knock on the door pulls my head from under the blanket I've buried myself in. I haven't heard a sound indicating that life even exists outside my bedroom so to say that the knock startled me is an understatement...

I crawl out of my comfy prison a minute or so later after I realize no one else is going to get it...

When I open the door I squint my eyes under the sun's bright rays. I feel like a fucking vampire.

"Bella let me in.", a slightly annoyed voice orders from the other side.

"Rosalie who the hell do you think you are telling me what to do in my own house?", I ask still leaning against the door so she doesn't come in... I actually don't know why I haven't let her in yet.

"I'm not _in_ your house. If that was the case I wouldn't be so bitchy." I don't have to see her to know she probably has her arms crossed while she taps her foot against the cement... yup. I hear the tappin'.

"Whatevs.", I mumble as I pull the door open so she can walk in, "What do you want?"

"Have I ever told you how amazing your people skills are?", she says with her voice dripping sarcasm.

"Okay you're on your way to being back outside.", I tell her blankly while poking a thumb over my shoulder at the door.

"Is that anyway to talk to your friend that went out of her way to bring you Krispy Cream?", she asks while revealing a bag of doughnuts from behind her back.

Without a word I snatch the bag from her hand and pull out a warm glazed one. Oh my god these are so good it should be sinful to eat one and I can eat almost a dozen by myself.

"I'm guessing there's more to your visit.", I question with a mouthful.

"Yes there is.", she starts while trying not to watch me stuff my face. I'm not in the mood to be polite. Plus it's my house!, "No ones seen or heard from you in a while, Bella. We were all getting worried."

It's all your dick for a brother's fault. He shouldn't have showed his face here again. He ruined everything.

"I just haven't felt well."

"Uh huh, sure. Go get a shower."

"Okay, bossy much?", seriously who died and made her queen?

"You're getting out of here, Bella! It's time to re join the world.", she says while holding her arms over her head, "Me, you, Emmett, Alice, and Jasper are going to spend the day together."

".... Why did you just kill that poor doughnut?", she asks with an arched eyebrow.

I look down at the crushed pastry in my hand. I guess the name 'Jasper' is the word that triggers the demon that lives under my skin. It's not much of a surprise is it?

"Uh.. I don't know.", I quickly shake off the feeling of anger that's trying to find it's way through as I stuff the doughnut in my mouth.

Rosalie stares at me with a 'what the fuck?' look.

"What? Just because it's crushed doesn't mean I can't eat it.", I tell her after I swallow. I'm gonna have such a sugar high today...

"Like I said, just go take a shower.... I'm pretty sure that's something you haven't done much of lately.", she says with a dry laugh.

I roll my eyes and jump up from the couch, walking through my bedroom and to the bathroom with Rosalie behind me.

"Oh for fucks sake Bella! It smells like something died in here!"

Oh yea... remember how I said I only got out of bed to go to the bathroom and eat? Well, I never brought my plates back to the kitchen and there might have been some food left on some of them...

I smirk at Rosalie as she holds a hand over her nose while she searches for the 'dead thing'.

"It might possibly be last night's Chinese or the pizza I had two days ago.", I take a sniff in the air, "or both."

"Okay this is beyond disgusting... it's like you've been hibernating or something. Get your ass in the shower while I clean your room.", she pulls her hair up in a lose ponytail and starts to gather all the dirty dishes.

"If you hear me scream please be a friend and come out to see if I'm okay.", she says after I shut the bathroom door and get into the shower while laughing.

........

"Jasper and Tink are here.", Emmett calls out.

"Thanks for the update.", Rosalie says, looking bored as she runs a hand through her beautiful blonde hair, "They _said_ they were going to be here over an hour ago. Yet here we sit."

And for the whole hour and a half my mind has being going over all the bad things that could've easily happened during their absence. I seriously need to stop thinking for a while before my head explodes.

I stand up from my place on the couch when they walk through the room... hand in hand. Even if I know Alice has absolutely no feelings towards him and its all just for show, I can't help but duck my head down while jealousy and anger runs through my veins.

It's my job to hold her hand.

"Sorry we're late. Jasper was taking forever to get ready.", Alice says with a dramatic sigh.

I look up to find her staring at me with a secret smile. On the surface everything looks fine. I hope it's like that on the inside too.

Alice knows I have to keep my hands off of her while we're in front of others, so why the hell did she dress so sexy??? Is it just to tempt me? To test and see if I don't tackle her to the ground?

She's wearing a pair of black flat knee high boots with buckles on the side, a jean skirt that might show a little of her perfect ass if she bends over, and an Asking Alexandria band tee. I hope I'm not drooling.

"You do know it's custom for the girls to take longer, right?", Emmett jokes.

"And _that's_ why I'm dressed better than you.", Jasper points out with a grin I want to shoot off with a shot gun... we'll see who's grinning after that.

After a few more 'manly' jokes are exchanged we make our way out of the house.

And with the way Jasper is constantly at Alice's side, it's going to be hard to get her alone so we can talk.

.........

All through lunch at Chili's me and Alice stole many glances from each other. She'd always give me the same smile. A smile that silently was telling me not to worry. But that's not enough. I have to _hear_ that she's okay.

Now we're walking through the mall, killing time till the movie we decided to see starts. I couldn't tell you what it was I just agreed to it.

It's really packed today. It seems like I've almost ran into a dozen people.... I should really pay attention to where I'm going and less on burning a hole into the back of Jasper's head.

I don't like the way he's touching Alice and from the look on her face she doesn't like it either. She shrugs off every one of his touches. Can he not tell that he's making her feel uncomfortable? Fuck what am I saying, he wouldn't give a shit if he did know.

"Jasper stop." I hear Alice mumble for the millionth time as he tries to rest his hand on her butt.

That's it. I've had just about enough of this shit.

An idea pops into my head and before I have time to think it over I quickly put it to action. I stick my hand through the opening between Alice and Jasper, reaching out, grabbing firmly onto the woman's ass in front of them, and pulling away.

She instantly stops and turns around angrily and as soon as she does I point a finger towards Jasper.

"Is there a prob-", before the fucker even has time to complete his sentence he gets a knee right in the balls.

He gasps out and brings both his hand to cradle his crotch as he falls to the ground while I laugh my fucking ass off.

"Perv!", The woman spits out and then storms off.

"What the _hell_ did you do man?", Emmett asks while he watches the woman's back.

"I don't know!", Jasper winces out. Oh he's soooooo trying not to cry. This is just too good.

"Look daddy! He hurt his pebbles!", some little boy exclaims while pointing over at Jasper while he lays in the fetal position. By now everyone in the area is observing what happened...

'Too good' just got upgraded to 'fucking great'.

I quickly pull myself together once I realize that Emmett and Rosalie are kneeling over Jasper and Alice is just standing off to the side turning red from holding in her laughs. This might be my only chance to talk to her alone.

Her arms wrap around my middle as soon as I pull us away from the others.

"Oh Bella I've missed you.", she says into my shoulder.

"I've missed you too, angel.", I breathe out as I run a hand through the back of her hair while my other stays on her side.

"Not that I object but, why did Jasper take a shot to the balls?", she asks.

"I might've grabbed that lady's ass and then blamed him for it.", I tell her innocently.

"You're so bad.", she smirks.

"He hasn't touched you has he? Said anything bad? Done anything that would enter the realm of badness?", I question.

Her eyes leave mine for a quick second and then focus back, "No. He hasn't."

"You're lying.", I narrow my eyes on her, "What has he done, Alice?"

"I'm not! He hasn't hurt me Bella!", she answers a little too quickly which only leads me to believe that he has done something.

"Why are you protecting him?"

"Oh my god, Bella please stop.", she shakes lose from my grip on her wrists and steps back, "I don't want to argue with you. You just have to trust me when I say that I'd tell you if he's hurt me."

"It's kinda hard to do that when your face is telling me that there's something you're leaving out.", I'm only digging myself into a deeper hole if I keep pushing her. I could just be paranoid. There might not be anything to tell... but the look on her face is giving her away. If he hasn't hurt her, he's done _something._

If there is something she's definitely not going to say now.

I let out a defeated breath, "We should go see if they've scrapped Jasper up off the floor."

And with that I shove my hands into my pockets and we walk back over to the others.

........

We've been sitting in the theater for about 40 minutes and I still don't know what we're watching. All I know is it's about vampires. Usually I'd be all into a vamp movie but I can't concentrate with Alice sitting 3 seats down from me. I feel like a fucking parent spying on their daughter's first date. I keep casually looking over Emmett to see if Jasper is keeping his hands to himself.... I'm pretty sure it's past casual since I do it every 3 minutes.

Ha get this, Jasper had to get a bag of ice from the concession stand to put in his lap. He's such a pussy.

"Is there something wrong with your neck?", Emmett asks annoyed after I once again look over him to get a view of Alice and Jasper.

I shake my head to tell him no and showing that my neck is fine.

"Then watch the movie.", he says while pointing at the screen and then putting an arm around Rosalie.

I sink into the back of my seat with a sigh. I hate this.

A few seconds later I feel my phone buzzing. I reach into my pocket and flip it open....

**"Meet me in the bathroom. 2 minutes."**

**Call: Alice**

As soon as I get done reading the text I see Alice stand up and excuse herself to the bathroom as she walks in front of all of us. The glow from the screen shows that she's smiling down at me when she walks past me and down the steps.

I take a deep breath and start counting in my head...

1.. 2... 3.. 4... 5... 6... 7... 8... 9... 10...... 50.... blue..... 74.... red... 82....

Yea okay that's enough time...

"I have to go potty.", I whisper to Emmett. I'm not even sure he heard me because I jumped out the chair so damn fast...

When I get to the rest room Alice is looking herself over in the mirror, fixing her bangs so they fall where she likes.

"So, why did you ask me to meet you in the bathroom? You gonna sell me drugs or something?", I joke just to break the silence.

"Lock the door."

Her order automatically makes me twist the lock so no one can enter.

In a quick stride she crosses the room and into my arms as she pulls me down for a hot kiss. I've missed her lips so much.

She walks us backwards while we kiss to the sinks and with my help I pull her up so she's sitting on top of them. Her legs open allowing me to push my body into her.

"Bella.", she moans, wrapping her legs around my waist. I run my hands over her smooth limbs and pushing up her skirt a little in the process.

Alice starts to rock her hips when my finger tips graze her center through her panties.

My mouth attacks her neck as I pick her up by the ass and slam her back into the bathroom wall to brace her. I push her panties to the side and tease her entrance. I love how I can make her _this_ wet.

"Maybe we shouldn't.", she breathes out against my ear before she sucks gently on the lobe.

"You don't sound very convincing.", I smirk while I play with her clit which gets a whimper of pleasure out of her.

Without wasting anymore time I push two fingers deep into her hot, wet center and watch as she pushes her head back into the tile and grips tight onto my shoulders.

"Faster.", she almost sounds drunk as she grinds on my fingers. I use my own hips to push against my wrist which causes Alice to bounce harder and faster as I curl my fingers inside her.

"Oh fuck Bella.", she cries out. I can feel her heels digging into my back and it only makes me go faster.

"That's right, baby. I'm the only one who can touch you like this.", I grunt out while I use all the strength I have to get her to cum. "You're mine."

And with one more hard thrust she explodes. Allowing her juices to trail down my fingers and along my wrist.

I don't think there's anything more beautiful than Alice after an orgasm.

She gives me a soft kiss and I put her down so she can straighten out her skirt... and everything else.

"We should uh... we should go watch the movie.", she says with a grin.

"If it's not over." I add while licking my fingers clean as she unlocks the bathroom door and we walk out...

* * *

***ONE WEEK LATER***

"Xander you should just automatically fall to the ground.", I say to the Buffy episode I'm watching. Xander just got knocked out again. Seriously you think the guy would learn that him jumping into the fight always ends with him face down on the floor.

I guess I should tell you that Jasper is _still_ down here. Alice is _still_ with him on a daily basis. And I _still_ don't get to see her as much as I should.

The last time we kissed or were intimate in anyway was in the theater bathroom last week... that sounds reeeeeally classy doesn't it?

The last time we touched was yesterday night when I helped her reach a box of cereal from behind. I can't live on stealing simple touches like that.

The ringing of my phone pulls my attention from Buffy...

"This better be good...", I mumble while I reach for it. I hate when my Buffy time is interrupted...

It's Alice....

"Hello?", I answer cheerfully... but then when I hear heavy breathing on the other end the cheerfulness dies and I start to panic, "Alice???"

"Bella...", she breathes out with fear in her voice. And then suddenly I hear the sound of crashing glass and my heart stops along with the phone line...

"Alice!", I shriek into the receiver even though I know I wont get a response.

I quickly leap from my bed not bothering to put on any shoes and I run outside and out to my truck.

No one better get in my way because rage is what's driving... and nothing is going to stop me.

* * *

***Hides* I'm sorry for another cliffhanger! I can't help it though... I'm just evil like that ;). Actually the story will flow better if I stop it there and I'm about to leave my house for the night soooo I won't have time to write anymore for this chapter.**

**I love y'all and I hope you enjoyed this one! Let me know what you're thinking pweeeease!  
**


	13. Nightmares Come To Life

**Hey babes! So, I wasn't busy tonight so I decided to write and I have an early update! I know it's not long and I'm sorry for that. I did originally want to make it longer, but I felt bad for the cliffhanger I did last chapter so I thought I'd just stop it short and get this chapter up while I was feeling all peppy =D.**

**So I hope y'all like it!:  
**

* * *

My heart is beating so hard it might burst through my chest and fall onto the dashboard of the truck. I can't seem to control my breathing as my foot lays heavily on the gas pedal,

"Come on you piece of shit!", I scream through clenched teeth and putting even more weight on the gas, pushing my truck to go as fast as possible. Which isn't good enough.

I'm going dangerously over the speed limit but I don't care. I have to get to Alice... I just hope I don't get myself or others killed in the process.

I quickly punch in Alice's cell number while running another stop light. I know it's a useless attempt just like the other 11 times I've called her. All I get is that annoying fucking beeping that makes me want to throw my phone out the window. Instead I just toss it on the seat and run a shaky hand through my hair while keeping the other firmly on the wheel. My chest aches as another dry sob racks through my body. My anger has reached a point where I can't seem to produce tears...

A person in the car I just cut off slams down on their horn, "Sorry", I mumble while looking in the rear view mirror. Time is against me and I can't afford to stop and drive like I have sense.

Just two more miles till I reach the hotel Alice told me they're staying in. I silently pray to God that this is where they are....

It's crazy that I haven't passed one fucking cop. Or maybe I have and I just didn't notice them. Surely they'd come after my ass with their lights flashing if I did happen to fly past one. If not then I should talk to Charlie about his fellow officers and the shitty job they're doing to keep the roads safe... That was a joke by the way. There's no way I'm confronting Charlie about how I managed to drive like a bat out of hell through Forks without being caught...

I let out an inappropriate chuckle as I think about how this is just like me racing to stop Alice at the airport 5 years ago... I just hope this has a better outcome.

When my truck slides into the hotel parking lot I don't bother about parking in a spot. I get as close to the hotel as possible without hitting any of the other cars and then I jump out without turning off the ignition or shutting the door.

I run past the woman at the desk who rudely told me that I need to go out and move my truck and up the stairs to the second floor.

My breathing starts to get even more shaky and labored when I get closer and closer to the room

* * *

As soon as I come to a quick stop in front of 209 my sweaty palm closes around the knob and I give it a twist.

God must be on my side tonight because the door was unlocked...

"Alice!", I scream out when I enter the room. But all I hear is the sound of my echos against the cold, dark walls.

There's no one in here but I notice that this is a double room and there's another area to it.

While walking to the other living area I notice that... that it looks like there was a struggle.

A painting on the wall is hanging sideways, a chair is knocked over, the coffee maker that was suppose to be on the counter is on the floor, the remote to the tv is laying in pieces, and the bottom corner of the mattress is off the bed.

I feel myself getting more and more afraid of what I'm about to walk in on. More dry sobs run through me as I get closer. After seeing the room like this I know for a fact Alice is here... and I know my chances of finding her unharmed are not likely.

My nightmare has come to life when I see the sight before me...

I failed. I couldn't protect her like I promised.

"Oh my God...", I shutter out as tears finally break through.

Alice is lying lifeless on the floor by a broken glass table, a small pool of blood puddling around her head....

I think my heart stopped...

* * *

_***FLASH BACK, BEFORE THE PHONE CALL***_

_**APOV  
**_

_"How's dinner?", Jasper asks from across the table. _

_"Good.", I tell him with a forced smile._

_We've been eating in an awkward silence. But I prefer it over talking. I just want so much to be with Bella again. I hate staying with Jasper and pretending like I still love him... What am I saying, I __**never**__ loved him. Maybe when we first started dating. When he hid his true self... but I always loved Bella more. Deep down I always knew she was the one I was meant for._

_"What happened to your ring?"_

_The fact that his question startled me was pretty obvious since I choked a little on the tea I was nervously sipping on._

_"I'm sorry?", I wipe my thumb across my lip, removing some of the residue. I heard him clearly so I don't know why I'm making him repeat it._

_"Your wedding ring, where is it?", his voice isn't hard, but his eyes are..._

_I look down at my left hand and let an expression of surprise cover my face, like I just remembered what happened, "Oh,", I giggle, "I was helping Bella wash her dishes the other night and I took it off because I didn't want it to get wet or anything. I must have forgot to put it back on."_

_He runs his finger tip over his jaw line while he studies my face, waiting for me to break under his stare, "Why are you lying to me, Alice?"_

_My heart starts to pick up its pace and I feel my gut telling me something isn't right, "I'm not lying."_

_"Oh, but you are...", I don't like the way he's looking at me, "I haven't seen your ring on your finger since I've been back."_

_When I don't respond he continues, "Now I'm going to ask you again, where's your ring?"_

_You ever had one of those nightmares where someones stalking you and you try to run or scream or do __**something**__ to get away but no matter how hard you try nothing happens? That's how I feel right now... I feel like I'm trapped._

_He continues to stare at me with his stern gaze and hard jaw, waiting for his answer..._

_"I lost it", I tell him while looking to my lap, "I lost it at Bella's."_

_It's technically not a lie._

_I look back up when I hear him take in a sharp breath. He's still staring at me and I see his jaw clenching._

_"Are you sleeping with her?"_

_Oh my god... If he's not already certain on my answer my face probably cleared it up for him. _

_My mouth opens and closes back as I try to find my voice, but like in those nightmares nothing comes out..._

_His clenched fist slams down on the table, making the forks clang against the plates and me flinch._

_"And don't you lie to me either.", He shoots out through his teeth._

_The fear I was already feeling is now ten times worse. There's no way this is going to end well..._

_"Yes", I answer softly, eyes focusing on his. I won't let him see my fear, "We've not only been sleeping together but we __**are**__ together. I love her and she loves me.... It's over Jasper."_

_He jumps up from the table, knocking over the chair in the process, "How could you? I gave you everything! I-"_

_"You gave me nothing, Jasper!", I challenge back while standing up as well, "If anything I was your prisoner!"_

_"I loved you.", I can practically see his blood boiling._

_I can't help but laugh at him, "You loved me? Have you looked up the definition of 'love' lately? Because I don't think you know the meaning of the word."_

_My words are coming through like acid and I can tell they're hitting him hard, "Bella loves me. You don't. I can see it in her eyes. You looked at me as if I was a possession... if you loved me you wouldn't have treated me the way you did all these years.", I shake my head from side to side, "None of that was out of love."_

_It felt great to finally say that and to see the look on his face. But my high is quickly over when I see him cross the room and over to me with the look of a bull._

_As I walk backwards I feel my back connect with the wall, knocking a picture crooked. I'm cornered._

_I squeal when I feel his hands grab roughly onto my shoulders._

_"No. I love you, Alice!", he sounds chaotic. I wonder if he knows how hard he's squeezing me._

_"Don't!", I wince out as I use a hand to try and pry off his grip. He's too strong. I use my other hand to feel along the table for anything to defend myself with._

_My fingers graze the remote. I get a good grip on it and with a grunt I break it against his head._

_His hands leave my shoulders and go instinctively to where I hit him._

_I grab my cellphone off the bed and when I turn my head I see Jasper walking towards me. On my way to the other room I pick up something off the mini fridge and throw it at his head, but since I'm shaking so much from the fear I miss and as it hits the wall I notice it was the coffee maker. _

_I break into a run for the joined room and Jasper does the same but he trips over the corner of the bed. I use that as my opportunity to use my phone. My nervous fingers dial Bella..._

_My eyes shut peacefully as the sound of her voice meets my ears on the other end. But my breath picks back up when I hear Jasper coming closer..._

_"Bella..", I shake out... and that's all I have time to say before I feel two big hands push firmly on my back._

_Pain shoots through me when my head and part of my side meets the glass table, shattering it under my small frame from the force of the fall._

_Again, this is like those nightmares.... I can't move... I can't scream.... I can't breathe...._

_I feel my eyes growing heavy as the intense pain begins to fade away. The room is growing dark and I'm trying so hard to keep my eyes open, but letting them fall shut sounds comforting... and I almost want it.  
_

_"What have I done?", I barely hear Jasper say from somewhere in the room..._

_When I called Bella I wanted to tell her what was happening... and that I love her more than anything._

_But I don't think I'm going to get that chance....._

_Suddenly the light begins to fade and I feel myself drifting off into a deep sleep... letting myself lose the fight to stay conscious._

_***END OF FLASHBACK***_

_**

* * *

  
**_

I run across the room and fall to my knees beside her, "Alice! No, no, no, GOD NO!", the shrill sound of my voice fills the silent room.

My hand cups around my mouth as I cry harder than I ever have in my entire life... Nothing can prepare you for this. To walk in and see a loved one on the floor in cold blood and knowing that if you did _something_ different you could have stopped it. The fear of losing them forever hits you with a force so strong it's hard to catch a breath. So many thoughts run through your mind as your eyes frantically trace over every inch of their body but it's hard to see clearly through the tears. You feel so helpless... so alone. You don't want this to be the end... You don't want to think that this could really be the moment that God decides to take them away from you. How could he? How could he take your world away like this? Especially in a way so violent. It's just too cruel. This _can't_ be the end. This _won't _be the end. You'd stand before God and tell him to his face that Heaven will not be getting a new Angel tonight. It might be selfish but you know it's not their time... and you'll do anything to keep them on Earth with you. So they can live out their life to the fullest. So everyday you get to see their smile and hear them laugh and comfort them when they cry.... it's little things like that that you miss so much when they're gone... that you wish _so_ much to have again....

"Baby please! Oh God please, don't let her be dead_ please_ I'll do anything!", I cry out. I want so much to touch her. To wrap my arms around her and cradle her against my chest, but I'm afraid if I do I might hurt her. More.

I hover a shaky hand over her face and up to her temple where the blood is coming from. Her dark hair is plastered against it by the blood. There's _so_ much blood... I can't tell how bad the injury is. I can see fragments of broken glass though. The smell and the whole scene makes my stomach turn.

"Alice..", I whisper out as my tears continue to fall, dripping down the bridge of my nose and onto Alice. "_Please_... I need you."

Another rush of sobs hit me as I close my eyes and try to control my trembling body. I refuse to believe she's dead....

When I open my eyes I see the slow rise and fall of her chest. She's breathing... it's not too late.

My red, wet eyes go wide as I watch her weak breathing flow through her. A wave of relief hits me.

_Heaven will not be getting a new angel... not tonight. Not Alice.  
_

Suddenly I hear something coming from the corner of the room, causing me to jerk my head towards the sound...

I squint my eyes to make out the form.... It's Jasper.

He's sitting with his arms wrapped around his legs and his chin resting on his knees. His eyes are fixed on Alice. It looks like he's not even blinking.

"Is- is she okay?", He stutters out. "Oh my god what have I done.. what have I done." He sounds borderline crazy... he looks like it too with the way he's sitting there like that.

Finally he scrambles up to his feet, using the wall for support and walks over to us. I jump to my feet and meet him half way.

"Please tell me she's okay! Bella PLEASE!"

When I reach him my fist collides with his jaw and the force knocks him backwards. His hand reaches up to touch his bleeding lip and before he has time to say anything else my fist connects again. This time with his eye.

I back up a little as he slides down the wall and back to a sitting position...

"GET THE FUCK UP YOU PIECE OF SHIT!", I scream out at him with my fists clinched at my side.

"Come on! HIT ME!", I continue when he doesn't respond, "What? You can put your hands on her but you don't have the balls to hit me? You make me sick."

His head hangs down in shame. He takes a breath and looks back up at me, "Is she okay?", he asks desperately.

"She's breathing... but if she stops, trust me when I say I'll personally cut off _your_ air supply.", I say with my jaw tight as I stare down at him, "and that's not a threat. It's a promise."

I stare him down for a few seconds longer, making sure he plans to remain on the floor and then I walk back over and kneel down by Alice.

"Bella..", I hear her breathe out so quietly that if I wasn't paying so close attention to her I wouldn't have heard it.

"Alice?", I take her hand in mine and give it a soft squeeze, letting her know I'm here. I wish she'd open her eyes...

Her lips move slightly like she wants to say something, but I guess she doesn't have the strength...

I let out a hard breath as more tears find there way out, "Alice you can't leave me baby. Just hold on... I love you."

I feel her small hand weakly squeeze mine and I hold on tight. I wont let her go.

The sound of an ambulance and cop cars reach my ears and then I see their lights coming through the small window and dancing on the wall. I was hoping all the noise from the room would get someones attention and they'd call 911 since I left my phone in the truck.

Heavy foot steps are heard coming through the room. It's the police. I turn my head to the entrance of the room and I see Charlie with more cops behind him, guns in hand.

"Bella... what happened?", Charlie lowers his gun and his face goes pale as he takes in the sight.

"Dad, we have to get Alice to a hospital. NOW. Please you have to help her, you have to do something!.", I cry out to him, still holding on to Alice's hand.

He quickly pulls himself together and says something to the cop beside him and then that guy runs out the door and down the stairs.

Charlie puts his gun back in the holster and comes to my side, "Oh my...", he places a hand over his mouth when he gets a closer look at Alice, "Where the hell is the medical team?", he yells sternly over his shoulder which scares some of the other officers.

A few seconds later the team in question rushes through the door with all their gear, "Miss you need to step back.", one of them tells me as they get to their knees but I don't move.

"No, I won't let her go.", I tell them while shaking my head. I feel Charlie pulling on my shoulders a little, encouraging me to get up.

"If you want her to live you need to give us space.", a woman says sharply while looking up into my eyes.

"There's no time. We need to get her to a hospital fast.", a man says quickly and then tells another man from the ambulance to get the stretcher.

My body goes numb as I let go of Alice's hand, letting Charlie pull me away. I watch as they take caution in putting her on the stretcher and then rolling her out the door.

Silent tears rolls down my cheek and onto Charlies uniform as he wraps me in a tight embrace.

"She'll be okay sweetie.", the uncertainty of his words are clear in his voice. But he's trying to be a good dad by keeping a positive mind for me.

"Bella, you're bleeding."

I look up at his face. How am I bleeding? It's probably not my blood... I follow his worried gaze down to my legs and feet... huh, I am bleeding.

Pieces of glass from the broken table are stuck in my knees and blood is trickling down my leg. Now that I actually notice I'm hurt I can feel the pain coming through. Not just from my knees, but from my bare feet as well...

"It's from where I was kneeling and walking on the floor.", I wince out while holding onto Charlie for support.

"This looks bad. I'm gonna go see if I can get someone from the ambulance to check you out."

Before I have time to talk him out of it he's gone...

I make my way painfully over to a chair and plop down in it with a huff. My eyes fix themselves on the spot where Alice was laying. I watch the puddle of blood like it holds some kind of trance over me. It's strange how 5 minutes ago my mind was going crazy with thoughts and now it's completely silent. I'm too numb to think. I feel like I can't even function.

"Bella Swan, can I ask you a few questions?", a cop asks pulling me out of the blood trance. I give him a nod to continue. Might as well get all this out of the way.

"What is your relation to Alice Cullen?". Hell, what do I tell him? The truth? It's going to come out anyway....

"She's uh... she's my girlfriend." That felt good to say.

The cop glances up from his note pad for a quick second and then goes back to writing.

"Okay... can you tell me what happened here tonight?"

"No. I don't know what happened.", I feel like something dirty is crawling around in my insides, "I got a phone call from Alice. It sounded like something was wrong so I came over here and... and I found her.", the last few words came out quietly as I look down at my feet that are now being treated by a guy from the ambulance.

I'm glad the cop was listening close enough so I didn't have to repeat myself.

"Is there anything else you can tell me?"

"Yea. The guy who caused all this... Jasper Hale.", The look in my eyes causes the cop to stand back a little. I guess I scared him.

"Does this man have curly blond hair?", he asks with narrow eyes.

"That's the fucker."

"We saw him running through the lobby and out the front door when we arrived. We were in such a hurry to get upstairs though because quite a few people called in about hearing suspicious noises coming from this room so no one stopped him. We will definitely be on look out though. He needs to be brought in for questioning.... Thank you for your time Bella.", He bows his head and walks out the door.

After getting bandaged up I grabbed my phone out my truck and asked Charlie to take me to the hospital so I can get back to Alice's side.

Where I belong...

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**Okay I hope that was up to standards for a quick update. I just felt like a bitch for leaving the last one like I did haha. I wanted to give y'all something cause you guys deserve it =).**


	14. Wake Up

***pokes head in* DON'T HIT ME! I am sooooooooooooooooooooooooooo sorry for how long it took me to get this up(That's what she said..hehe...) ANYWAYS, I was really busy this week and to top it off my mind would not work with me on this chapter so it's not my best AT ALL. But I wanted to get something out there so all during my break at work I wrote down little notes of things to put in for this short ass chapter so I could update today.**

**Again I apologize for the suckiness of this =/, but still let me know what you think even if it's bad. Reviews keep me in my happy place =D**

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"Bella, calm down sweetie.", Charlie whispers while rubbing my shoulder soothingly as I push the button to the elevator for the 10th time. It's taking too fucking long.

"Well if the elevator would hurry the fuck up.", I mumble.

I'm a nervous wreck. I feel like I've been through the pits of hell and back... I probably look like it too.

As soon as the elevator doors open me and Charlie step in and I hit the 3rd floor button. Two seconds later I hit it again.

"What room did that lady say she was in?"

"310.", I answer while pacing. There's hardly enough room to even stand in here so it probably looks like I'm a tennis ball bouncing off the walls.

The adrenaline and rage from earlier are still stewing in my veins. I keep squeezing my eyes shut like this is all a horrible dream and at any moment I'm going to wake up in my bed next to Alice's beautiful sleeping form and I'll know everything is okay...

But when I open my eyes I'm still trapped in this nightmare. I'm living my worst fear... and that is that I could lose Alice. I could lose my everything.

The ding from the elevator pulls me out of my daze and I speed walk through the doors as soon as they're open enough for me to squeeze through.

"Slow down, Bells.", I hear Charlie huffing out from behind but I keep my pace.

Charlie almost runs into me when I come to a stop at her room.

I slowly walk in like a vulnerable child walking into their classroom on the first day of kindergarten.

A sharp breath is caught in my throat when I see Alice lying in the hospital bed. Her eyes are still closed and it looks like she's sleeping peacefully. But the wires from all the machines in the small room inserted into her little arms and her bandaged head remind me that she's in no peace. A breathing tube is resting in her nose, allowing air to flow through from the ventilator. She looks so fragile. So broken. It's too much...

My bottom lip starts to quiver as I quickly turn to throw my body into Charlie. His arms instantly wrap around me.

"Ssshhh, she's strong Bella. She's gonna make it through this.", Charlie whispers into my hair before placing a soft kiss on the top of my head.

"This isn't real.", I sob into his chest, "Let me wake up. Daddy, tell me this is all a nightmare." I haven't called Charlie daddy since I was 8.

It seems appropriate though. Because I feel like a child. A child who doesn't know what to do, who feels lost.

When you're young you could run to your dad for anything and he always made it better. If you came home crying with a cut up knee he would sweep you up into his arms, clean up your battle scar, and with a magic kiss on the wound the pain would go away. But when you get older you find out that there are things that your daddy can not fix. And this is one of those moments that is bigger than Charlie.... Daddy can't make it right.

"I wish this was as simple as a nightmare.", I don't need to see Charlie's face to know that all this is hitting him hard as well. Since me and Alice have been best friends since the sandbox days, she's basically like another daughter to him.

"I hate seeing her like this.", I say distantly after pulling away from Charlie to walk over to Alice. A tear falls from my cheek onto me and Alice's joined hands. I can't believe I even have any tears left. "It's like her light is gone... like she's not really here."

"She's here. She's with us, Bells.", I didn't even hear Charlie walk over to stand behind me. He points at Alice's chest that's rising and falling lazily.

"Yea... but if the ventilator is turned off, will she still be here?", the question comes out a little crackly because of all the crying I've been doing, my raw throat from the screaming, because of how vulnerable I am,.. and because I'm afraid of what the true answer might be.

Charlie decides to let the question just fade away unanswered.

Not too long later I hear him talking to a nurse that just walked in to check on Alice. I guess he's telling her who we are.

All I can do is stare down at the broken girl who holds my heart. She doesn't look like Alice. Just a shell of her that's missing that loving glow and radiant smile that could brighten the stormiest of nights. I wish I could kiss her bruises away. I wish I could change places with her. God knows I would in a heart beat....

"Bella."

I flinch when Charlie places a hand on my shoulder, pulling my gaze away from Alice.

"That nurse told me Carlisle is in the hallway and he'd like to talk to you."

Without a word I walk into the hall. Carlisle is standing there looking completely frazzled. His hair looks like nervous fingers have been raked through it many times. Dark circles are under his eyes that have spilt recent tears. It's weird seeing Carlisle looking like a mess when he's usually so put together. But it would be even weirder if he _did_ look put together after his own daughter was a patient in the ICU.

He tries his hardest to give me a weak smile, but his effort comes up short under these circumstances. I pull him into a warm hug, letting him know he doesn't have to hold himself together for me.

A hard breath leaves his lips when we part and he does manage to form a small smile. Hugs have magical powers I guess.

"How is she?"

His smile quickly fades as his hand finds his hair once again, "She's uh..."

"Tell me straight Carlisle. Please.", my eyes shut for a moment as I take in a breath to try and calm my nerves, but of course that never works, ".... is it bad?"

I can feel more tears forming as I look into his eyes, and by the look on his face I know my answer...

"Yea... it's bad."

My eyes slam back shut but a few tears still sneak out. I look up to the ceiling like all the answers to our problems are written up there...

Life can never be that easy...

"She'll be okay though, right? I- I mean she's breathing and everything so- so she'll be okay?", I need to hear that she's going to make it. My sanity depends on it.

"Alice lost quite a bit of blood... and the head trauma-", his eyes drop to the floor, wanting to look anywhere but at me. I hate how hard this is for him. I've never seen Carlisle like this. He tries his best to hold himself together long enough to get the information on Alice's condition to me, "After she was cleaned up, and after we removed the glass fragments from her temple, I was relieved to find out that there was no skull fracture... but the impact from the fall and how hard her head hit the table caused her brain to- to bang against her skull and there's a little swelling... she's in a coma right now."

It feels like someone plunged a knife right into my chest and I can't seem to catch my breath. My legs start to shake and I can feel myself getting closer to the floor.

Carlisle's arms snake around me before I hit the ground...

My eyes are wide open but I can't seem to see anything. Numbness is taking over my body and I feel like I might puke right here in the middle of the hospital hallway. The words, _'she's in a coma right now' _are echoing in my head and getting louder and louder each time. This is all too much. I can't take it. I'm not strong enough for this. I thought I could handle anything but god was I wrong...

Tears flood from my eyes at a pace so fast I didn't even no tears could travel.

Carlisle and Charlie, who I guess ran out of Alice's room when he heard me scream a few seconds ago, are now trying to get me to calm down. Yea, good luck with that.

"Bells you gotta calm down so you can catch your breath.", Charlie's worried voice breaks through.

"I.. can't.. I-I", I seriously can't get a hold of my breathing. And now the room is spinning along with my vision.

"She's having a panic attack. Charlie bring her into the open room across from Alice."

Suddenly I feel Charlie's arms scoop me up and carry me to the room Carlisle pointed out. My back gently hits the bed and I close my eyes, wanting so much for the room to sit still. Images of Alice smiling brightly instantly appear. Her gorgeous eyes are fixed on me and the love she feels is burning through so strong... it's like she's actually here, watching over me. It's so real...

My breathing finally evens out and I feel like I have control over myself again. Slowly my eyes open and I see Charlie and Carlisle hovering nervously over me...

"Uhhh... you two are in my bubble."

They instantly back up a little to give me some space so I can sit up. It took a little more effort than I thought it would. I guess my little episode took a lot out of me.

"You scared me, babe. I thought you were having a heart attack.", damn. Charlie looks just as rough as Carlisle does now.

"Sorry dad.", I look down to my hands resting in my lap. I can't help but feel embarrassed about what happened out in the hall even if it was out of my control. "It felt like I was dying for a second."

I see Charlie wince at my words from the corner of my eye.

"You had a panic attack, Bella. It lasted for about 10 minutes.", Carlisle says while looking me over, making sure I'm okay.

The news of Alice's current state is what triggered it. I guess that pretty much goes without saying, huh?

"Dr. Cullen, you're needed on the 2nd floor."

Carlisle turns his head to the door and sighs. He looks so worn out, "Can it wait, Judy? I'm needed here as well.", his eyes close as something comes to his mind, "I still have to call my wife to tell her about our daughter."

"I'm sorry sir. But I was told that it's an emergency.", Judy then walks from the entrance of the room and out of sight.

"You haven't told Esme?", I ask him quietly. I can't believe he hasn't informed her about Alice. No wonder her or Emmett isn't here.

"I planned on it... I was hoping that when I called I would have better news though.", his jaw tightens as he tries to hold back tears, "... I don't want to tell my wife that our only daughter is in a coma, and the longer she stays in it..." Carlisle's voice cracks and even without him finishing his sentence I know all too well what he was going to say...

"Carlisle, I'll call Esme.", I tell him after taking a long breath to keep myself steady.

"No Bella you don't have-"

"It's fine. I can do it. Someone else needs your help right now."

After a few long seconds he gives me a weak smile and a thank you then walks out the room to tend to his other patience.

I sat in the bed for a little longer, thinking of what I was going to tell Esme before I was on the phone with her. This has to be handled very delicately. I know it's going to crush her either way...

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I'm now standing in the corner of Alice's room watching Esme crying over her daughter while holding onto her hand. Emmett is standing beside Esme with his hand resting on her shoulder, silent tears streaking his cheeks. Rosalie and Edward are resting against the wall beside me, their faces mirroring Emmett's. We thought that we should give Esme and Emmett some space with Alice. It seemed to be the right thing to do...

When I called I got lucky, Rosalie and Edward were already at the Cullen's so I didn't have to call two more times to deliver the horrible news. It was agonizing doing it once...

"How long?"

Emmett's voice pulls my attention from Alice, "What?"

"How long is she going to be like this?"

"Carlisle said that she could wake up at any time, but the longer it lasts... the less likely she'll-"

Esme takes in a sharp breath and looks to Alice, "Wake up sweetie. Mommy needs you to wake up."

Nothing....

Rosalie walks over to comfort Emmett when he turns to face the window, hiding his fresh tears. When Rosalie's hand reaches Emmett's arm he breaks down and begins to sob, leaning against the window pane for support. I look to the right and Edward is no longer in the room, but I hear light sniffles coming from the hall.

"What happened? Why is my baby here?"

Oh yea, when I called Esme all I had time to say was that Alice was in the hospital and she's on a breathing machine. Then I heard the phone on the other end drop to the floor. 15 minutes later they were all here...

What do I tell them? Everything? The truth? I look over to Alice... and I know I _have_ to tell the truth. Maybe if we did that in the first place she wouldn't be laying in the hospital. After what happened the truth has to come out.

It's time for them all to know. About Jasper, about what he's done the last 5 years, about what he did tonight... it's time for them to know about us.

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It took about 30 minutes for me to tell the whole story. I had to pause a few time to steady my voice and collect myself so I don't cry in the middle of it. Through all of it everyone stayed quiet and listened closely to what I was saying. I even got a little nervous under all their gazes.

"No. You- you're wrong. Jasper would never do something like this."

"Rosalie he was there when I found Alice. He basically admitted to it.... I'm not wrong.", I know she's only defending him because he's her brother. Or maybe she really does believe that everything I just said was a lie... I need to stay calm and be reasonable with her though...

"Well then Alice is a liar too.", she spits out.

That's it. Fuck being calm. How dare she say something like that when Alice is not even two feet away from us in a coma.

"Alice is _not_ a liar! Your brother is just a fucking waste of skin who doesn't deserve to have a beating heart- wait, what the hell am I saying? He has no heart! And how _dare you_ talk about Alice like that when she's not even able to defend herself."

"My brother is a good man! He would never hit a woman or abuse someone in anyway. I think you made all of that up so you can finally have Alice all to yourself since that's obviously what you wanted all this time!", We're now squared off right in each others faces and the only reason I haven't punched her in the mouth yet is because Emmett is holding me back. Poor Esme is just sitting there, not knowing what to do.

"Your fucking mouth isn't attached to your brain is it?", I'm completely shocked she's acting like this, "How can you sit here and talk out your ass in front of Esme and Emmett about Alice! I don't know if you're really that stupid or you just got some big ass balls in your panties." before she has time to say anything back I add with a dry chuckle, "maybe you could loan your balls to your brother. He could really use a pair."

I've hit so many of her nerves I'm surprised she hasn't attacked me yet... she must know I'd win if we ever did get into a fight.

She looks desperately at Emmett for backup,

"Sorry, Rose. But if I see your brother my fist is going to be introduced to his face. And I'm not going to stop till my knuckles come through the back of his skull. He doesn't get the satisfaction of breathing after what he's done to my little sister."

Rosalie's mouth slowly falls open along with more frustrated tears. After meeting everyone's hard stares she storms out the room.

"I can't believe she doesn't believe you.", Emmett looks away from where Rosalie was just standing and down to me, "I'm sorry for how she acted."

"She does believe me. That's the problem... she's in denial."

................

It's now 11 PM. Emmett, Esme, and Carlisle went home about an hour ago. It took a while but I convinced them to get home and get some sleep. Charlie is outside smoking a cigarette and I'm sitting with Alice. There's no way I'm leaving her...

"Come in.", I say distantly when I hear a soft knock on the door.

When it opens I turn to see Ashley, and her puffy eyes give away that she's been crying.

I stand up from the uncomfortable couch(Ya think they'd actually provide something that has some kind of cushion) and cross the room to pull her into a tight embrace.

"Ashley.", I bury my face into her neck and I start to cry yet again... the fact that she's here comforting me after everything that's happened just proves how amazing she is. Her familiar smell fills my nose when I take in a long breath and I feel at ease.

"I'm glad you came." I texted her a while ago letting her know that Alice was in the hospital. I thought she deserved to be kept in the loop.

"Of course... you know I'm always going to be here for you."

I do know. I really do.

"When I was walking up from the parking lot I saw Charlie and he told me everything.", she looks to her feet, "I feel like such a bitch for thinking so badly of her when we met."

"Ashely you didn't know what she went through. You were just acting like any good girlfriend would."

She smiles weakly and then it fades, "But still... now that I do know.", her eyes find Alice and she swallows hard, "I'm so, so sorry Bella."

"Don't be. She's going to make it out of this.", maybe if I keep saying it her beautiful eyes will flutter open...

"Well, how are you?", she asks concerned for my well being, "Wait. That was a stupid question."

The corner of my mouth pulls up into a small smile, "How 'bout I lie and say I'm spectacular?"

"Then I'll pretend to believe you.", she replies while returning the smile.

"Bella, were you ready to go?", Charlie asks after walking into the room. I know he's probably tired, but he clearly doesn't want to rush me.

"I'm not going, dad. I want to be here when Alice wakes up.", I look over to her, "I want to be the first person she sees."

"Okay then. Is there anything you want me to bring back to you?"

"Yea.", Props to Charlie. I didn't even think ahead like that." A couple sets of clean clothes and my ipod would be good."

"Uhhhh, what do you want to wear?"

"Dad you know my style is pretty much a lack of style.", I tell him blankly, "Just bring me some jeans and tshirts."

His brows scrunch together, "... are you gonna need panties?"

I stare at him deadpanned, "No, Charlie. I'm just going to wear this same pair over and over. I'll turn 'em inside out and get double usage."

"....Yes I'm going to need clean undies.", I tell him slowly when he just looks at me with a dumbfounded stare.

"Here's an idea.", Ashley chimes in, "How about I go and get your things."

"Now _that's_ a good plan.", Charlie says quickly while pointing is finge, obviously not wanting to go through his own daughter's bra and panties drawer.

Ashley giggles and walks out the door following behind Charlie...

Now I'm alone again with Alice. I pull a chair up to the side of her bed, sit down, and hold onto her hand. Stroking it softly with the back of my thumb.

All you can hear is the beeping of her machines and my shaky breathing.

"Alice, you have to wake up.", I softly whisper while looking desperately at her closed eyes, "The world feels so cold without your warm smile. Please open your eyes. I need to see those big beautiful eyes to make it through the day. You're my other half, Alice. So how am I going to live without you? I can't... I need you, baby. Without you I'm just that awkward, vulnerable 6 year old girl from the playground.... please, _please_ come back to me. You're a fighter so I know you're going to wake up. Just hurry because I miss you. We all miss you..."

I rub the back of my free hand over each of my eyes to wipe away the tears that fell.

"I love you, Alice.", I place a kiss on her temple that isn't bruised and bandaged, "... now wake up so you can say it back."

My eyes start to get weak and I can feel my body telling me it's time to go to sleep. I scoot the chair so I can lay my head beside Alice's.

Maybe it was just my imagination, but before I drifted off I thought I felt her hand slightly close around mine and heard the very soft whisper of an 'I love you'.....

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**Thanks for reading y'all! =D**

**Tell me what ya think  
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	15. Open Your Eyes

***Sigh* I'm sorry that it took me a while to get this chapter out like the last one! I wasn't able to work on it like I thought I was going to. I got called in to work the other day, and the day before that I had stayed over night at the hospital with my bff cause doctors can be really freakin' retarded -_-. And I fell into a writing funk and I kept getting distracted(my attention span sucks) so it took me FOREVER to finish this chapter. **

**I hope ya like it though. I think you will =D. And thanks so much for the reviews. Keep sendin' 'em my way!**

**Now I'm going to shut up so you can read:**

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"Ya got any twos?"

Yes. But you don't know that unless I tell you... which I'm not. I look over the top of the cards in my hand at Emmett, "Nope. Sure don't. Go fish."

He lets out an annoyed huff of air and snatches a card off the deck that's sitting on the floor between us. I can't help but laugh silently to myself....

I steal a glance over at Alice. Still nothing. Last night definitely must've been my tired mind playing games with me because she's still unresponsive. The only good news is that Alice can now breathe on her own... now if she would only wake up...

"Bella, it's your turn."

"Oh. Sorry.", I mumble when my eyes pull away from Alice, "Uhhh... twos?"

Emmett hangs his head in defeat while passing over the two of clubs. His eyes snap back up at me after I take the card from him,

"Heeeeyyy, I JUST asked if you had any twos."

"What? When?", I ask him innocently, trying my best to look confused while holding back a laugh.

"On my last turn I asked you!", he exasperates as his finger points to me and then to the cards in his hand.

"Uhhhh if you did I would've gave it to you.", I tell him with a 'duh' look on my face.

His mouth hangs slightly open as he second guesses himself on if he really did ask me. This is too damn funny., "I swear I asked you... didn't I?"

"You're losin' your mind, Em.", I say with a shrug.

Before he can question me anymore, Esme walks in...

"I went down to the hospital cafeteria.", by the look on her face she didn't like what she saw.

"...and?", Emmett asks, I guess not noticing the disgusted look his mother is displaying. He probably doesn't care if what they were serving looked like someone already ate something and just puked it back up on a bun. He can eat _anything._

"And I think we're going to go out to eat lunch.", she says blankly... I wonder if she's concerned that her son can't take a hint. Isn't that something we all learn when we're like, 10 or younger?

"Wherever you two go, will you bring me back something?"

"No because you're going with us. You need to get out of here for a while, Bella." I know Esme is concerned that I haven't really left the room once, but I'm just afraid that if I do leave, Alice will wake up and I wont be here...

"She'll be okay.", she adds softly when I turn to look over at Alice. No, if she _was_ okay she wouldn't be here right now...

"It'll be nice to inhale some air that isn't hospital air.", Emmett chimes in. I guess there's no way they're going to let me stay... plus Emmett could just toss me over his shoulder and carry me out if he wanted to. I wouldn't make it easy for him though damn it. I'd be kicking and punching frantically the whole time.

"Fine. Lets go and get it over with."

Before we walk out the door I take one last look over my shoulder.... _still nothing._

* * *

"So, have you talked to Rosalie since she basically went catatonic last night?", I ask casually after taking a small bite out of my burger. I don't think I'll have an appetite until Alice is out of the damn hospital.

"Uh... I don't know if talking is the word I would use.", Emmett starts after devouring his second order of fries, "it went more along the lines of her screaming into the phone without giving me a chance to even _think_ about saying something."

I smile a little while I pull the seeds off the bun and flicking them off my finger, "Sorry you caught the wrath of Rosalie."

"Bella you should've heard her.", he says wide eyed. I wouldn't be surprised if he pisses his pants, "I thought I was going to have to send an Exorcist over to her house."

"I got quite enough of Rosalie last night thank you very much..... you can actually still call in an Exorcist these days?", I ask with narrowed eyes as I ponder over it.

"The question is how much it costs to rent one.", Emmett says with the same wondering expression I have, "Those guys aren't cheap."

"You two are crazy.", Esme pipes in while trying to keep her laughing at a reasonable level. Even in Wendys she stays polite.

We all start laughing and exchange bright smiles...

"But seriously, how much do you think it costs?" I really wanna know now...

* * *

"How's she doing?", I ask anxiously while Carlisle examines Alice.

"She's doing fine... well, as fine as anyone can in a coma I guess." I hate when he uses the "C" word... and by "C" word I mean "Coma". It makes me flinch like I'm about to be punched or something.

"The bruising around her temple is going down some.", he adds while taking off the bandage to replace it with a clean one. Her bruises are starting to fade from black to blue... and every time I get a glimpse of her injuries an image of her crashing down onto the table flashes in front of my eyes. And no matter how many times I blink they never dissolve quick enough.

"Do you think she'll wake up soon?", I ask while staring at her eyelids. _Please just open them. Please._

Carlisle stops pushing buttons on one of her machines to look at me, "That is for Alice to decide."

I swallow down the lump I feel rising in my throat. I'm so tired of crying it feels like my body can't take it anymore.

"I need to make a phone call.", I say distantly after placing a kiss on the good side of Alice's forehead.

After grabbing my cell off the couch I walk out of the room and in the hallway. But still close enough so I can hear if something happens.

_**"Cheif Swan speaking." **_I don't know why the way he answers the station phone is so funny to me, but it is. I guess it's because I picture him standing in like a super hero pose or something...

**"Hey dad, it's me."**

_**"Bella?"**_

**"No, your other daughter.", **I tell him deadpanned.

_**".... Kristen?"**_

**"Haaaa real funny, Charlie.",** that actually was pretty damn funny. But he doesn't have to know that. **"Anyways, the reason I called is because I was wondering if you or any of the other officers ever found Jasper."**

I hear him take in a slow breath, _**"Not yet, Bells. I'm sorry."**_

My forehead presses into the cold hospital wall while I close my eyes. I knew I shouldn't have gotten my hopes up. **"Well, if you hear anything at all-"**

_**"You'll be the first to know."**_

**"Thanks, dad."**, if something doesn't come up soon though I might have to take matters into my own hands. Meaning when I find him, he won't be going to jail... he'll be 6 feet under the earth.

_**"And you know if you don't want to stay at your apartment you can always come back home so you're not alone."**_

**"I wont be alone. I'll be with Alice. I told you I'm not leaving till she wakes up and I bring her home myself."** I don't care how long it takes. I'm going to be here.

_**"Okay then. Just be careful. And I love you."**_

**"Love you too Char-... dad."**

After hanging up with Charlie I leaned against the wall and slowly slid down till my butt met the floor, putting my face in my hands.

She needs to wake up. I seriously don't feel right without her by my side... without hearing her laugh or voice, without feeling her touch, her lips... it's like I live off of all the things Alice does and without them the life is slowly draining out of me... I need her to survive. I need her always.

Without her I'm not complete. And I never will be until she wakes.

"Bella?"

I lazily tilt my head so some of my hair will fall from my eyes, "Hey Edward."

"Is she still-"

"Yea."

His sorrow filled gaze drops to the floor, "I couldn't stay home, not at Jacob's.. not anywhere. I feel like I should be here."

I smile weakly at him, "Join the club."

He sends his charming smirk my way and extends his hand out to me, "You shouldn't be sitting on the floor. It's not sanitary."

My hand closes around his and he helps pull me up, "This is a hospital. You could probably eat off their floor."

"I wouldn't recommend it.", he laughs.

One of Edward's arms wraps around my waist and I instantly feel a little more relaxed as we walk back into Alice's room.

* * *

"I'm guessing you haven't been to work lately, huh?", Edward asks quietly. I don't know why he's talking so low. It's not like Alice will wake up if he talks any louder. If only it was that simple.

"Nope. I called in and said that I probably wouldn't be returning for a while."

"I bet your boss was pissed."

"I didn't stay on the phone long enough to find out. I told him the situation Alice is in and if he has a problem with me missing work until my girlfriend comes out of a coma then he can kiss my ass and I told him don't expect me to come back if that's how it's going to be.", I let go of Alice's hand so I can stand up and stretch a little. It feels like there's a fucking board strapped to my back. It's probably from how I sit in this chair.

"I'm sure he'll understand. He's not a _complete_ ass.", he then grins a little and adds, "He's half an ass."

"He has his moments where he can be a double ass."

The door then creaks open wide enough for Emmett to stick his head in, "Hey Bella. Rosalie is here and she wants to talk to you."

I stop in mid stretch. Is he serious? I don't know if I'm in the current state of mind where I'll be able to talk civilized with her.

"... is that okay?", he asks when I don't respond.

"I don't know, is she going to put her foot in her mouth again?"

He lets out a sigh and pushes the door all the way open to show Rosalie standing there with her hands placed behind her back. She looks nervous as fuck.

"Just work it out.", Emmett says and then dings an imaginary bell... that looked more like the signal to start fighting if you ask me.

Ooooookay is she going to talk? She's the one who wanted to make things right so she better start talking before I get bored from just standing here.

"Bella, I'm really sorry for how I acted yesterday. I had no right to say the things I did."

"No. you really didn't."

She shifts a little under my hard stare. If Rosalie thought just saying _that_ was enough, she really wasted her time coming here.

"It's just.. when you started saying those things about Jasper, I jumped into the defense sister role. And I didn't want to hear the truth... I wanted you to be the bad guy.", she steals a glance at Alice and her face becomes even more pained, "I honestly _never_ thought he would do something like this. I never thought I'd be related to a monster.", she runs one of her fingers under each eye to catch the tears before they rolled., "Bella I really am sorry. You and Alice are my best friends and I love both of you. I love _all_ of you.", she looks around the room, looking each of us in the eye. She takes a deep breath when she sees Esme sitting on the couch, "And I want to apologize to you also. What I said about Alice, I didn't mean any of it. Honestly. I just wanted to believe that Jasper didn't do the things Bella said and shit- oops! excuse me, I mean _crap_ just spilled out of my mouth... and what makes it all worse is that it was said in front of you, her mother. I'm ashamed of it all and _wow_ I realized I've been talking for a long time now and I think I might need some water."

Esme giggles and sends a lovely smile over to Rosalie, "It's all okay, dear. Yesterday was.. extreme. We all were on edge and some things were said that shouldn't have been said. It's understandable though. I don't hold any grudges."

Rosalie lets out a breath she's been holding for so long I thought she was going to turn purple. Relief washes over her face when Esme pulls her in for a hug.

"Do _we_ hug?", she asks me after her and Esme part.

"I don't know. Unlike Esme, I could win a gold metal in grudge holding. And even if you didn't mean all those things you said it still pisses me off that you said them anyway. And it _really_ pisses me off that you think I would lie about what Jasper did."

Her smile fades and her eyes become very interested in her shoes.

"But, you did apologize to Esme and I thought that was very decent of you. So I'm willing to try and look past this."

Rosalie's eyes find mine again and she smiles brightly.

"Now hug.", Emmett demands while pushing me and Rosalie's bodies together, "Come oooooon huuuuggggg."

"You're so just doing this so you can stare out our boobies all smushin' together.", I tell him with a hint of a smirk playing on my lips.

"That is so-... possibly true."

We all start laughing and when Rose and I lock arms around each other Emmett lets us go so we can properly hug it out....

* * *

"Have you heard from Jasper?", I ask Rosalie as we wait for Esme, Emmett, and Edward to get back with pizza. I guess they thought me and Rosalie needed some alone time.

"No. After you told us what happened, I called him probably a dozen times. I was so desperate for him to tell me it was all untrue and that he was still my same brother from when we were kids... I just- I just don't see how he could turn out this way."

"There's something inside him he can't control, Rose.", If I wasn't trying so hard to be nice and comforting I would've said something a little more harsh with some strong language thrown in. But that would just make things worse right now. "It surprised everyone." Except me....

"I knew deep down that all you said was true, and when he never returned my calls any doubts I had went out the window.", she looks distantly over to Alice and takes in a deep breath, "I mean, if he didn't do it you'd think he would tell me or my parents that it was all a lie... but he never contacted any of us. So I have no idea where he is.... What do you think will happen when someone finds him?"

He'll be sent to prison where he'll be some big inmate's butt bitch for the rest of his life... "I don't know.", I answer with a shrug.

"I hope he's found. I really do.", I look at Rosalie and her jaw is set tight. And it looks like she absolutely hates Jasper.

About 15 minutes later the silence is broken by Emmett's loud feet and booming voice coming through the door with 3 Domino pizzas, "We return with yummy cheese on bread."

"And peperoni.", Edward adds with Esme walking in behind him.

"Carlisle didn't want to eat with us?", I ask to no one in particular.

"He said he wants to be alone.", Esme says with a sad smile. "So we just dropped off some pizza to him in his office on our way back to the room."

Carlisle has been basically living in his office since Alice got here. I guess it hurts him too much to see her so broken and helpless. No matter how much it kills me I still can't be away from her. He handles the pain differently. Carlisle stays away and I'm always at her side. Watching over her...

I take a slice of pizza as Edward walks around the room with an open box, offering each of us to get some. After one bite I feel full.

* * *

It's now 10 pm. Esme, Emmett, and Edward went down the hall to the sleeping room so they can get some rest. Rosalie went home because she didn't have any clean clothes. I really appreciate that they let me stay in the room with Alice alone. I mean, all four of us couldn't sleep in here. There's only one couch that pulls out into a small bed that I wouldn't recommend sleeping on because it sucks ass. But one of them could've slept on it if they wanted too because I just pull one of the chairs up to Alice's bed and sleep with my head resting as close as I can get to hers while I hold her hand. My back fucking hates me in the morning but I want to be as close to her as I can get... I just got an idea...

There's a little room for me to lay beside Alice in the bed. That's going to be a hell of a lot more comfortable than that chair.

I slide the guard rail on the bed down so I can climb in easily. Once I'm lying on my side, I place my arm carefully across Alice's center and I snuggle my head into her neck, taking in a deep breath and letting her intoxicating scent fill my nose. I've missed being this close to her. I pull my head back a little so I can stare at her closed eyes while stroking her arm softly. I wish she would react to my touch. I wish she would wake up and hold me close to her and whisper softly into my ear. I don't care what she says, I just miss her sweet voice.... I miss my best friend.

"I love you, Alice. Goodnight.", I place a soft kiss on her cheek and then wait for sleep to take me away into my dreams where Alice is awake and full of life...

* * *

"Bella... Bella, wake up..... BELLA WAKE UP."

The loud, annoying ass voice of Emmett pulls me out of sleepy land. I stretch out my arms while rolling to the side...

"What the- GAH!", with a loud thud I hit the floor. What the fucking fuck?! Who put the fucking guard rail down?!.... Oh wait. I did.

I quickly jump up from the ground, trying to play it off with a casual stretch, "I'm fine. I'm good. I uh, I meant to do that."

Emmett has been laughing since I hit the floor and I don't think he's going to stop any time soon. He doesn't stop even when I send one of my infamous death glares his way... okay dude really, I know that must've been funny as hell, but really??? Shut up!

"They should really make these beds wider... or closer to the ground. Or-"

"Or you could just remember to put the guard rail back up.", He laughs while falling into the couch. Damn. I wish he would've fell short so _I_ could laugh at his ass all sprawled out on the floor. Now that would've been priceless.

"Would you be quiet." I hiss out in a whisper, "There are other people in this hospital who are trying to sleep ya know."

"No actually it's pretty much just you.", He says, finally pulling himself back together after his laugh fest. "Well, you and Alice.... that's what I came in here for. Mom told me to wake you up 'cause it's almost 11 and she wanted to know if you wanted to come get some lunch with us."

"Just bring me back something. I'm gonna stay with Alice."

He gives me a look like he's about to argue, but instead just smiles a little and walks out.

I turn around to look at Alice, "Are you gonna open those eyes for me today?"

My heart would actually burst if I got a response.

"I'm not going anywhere. So when you're ready... I'll be here.", I say after sitting down in the chair and taking her hand in mine.

Please let today be the day...

* * *

"Okay, it's like half past my feeding time.", Emmett mumbles while rubbing a hand over his growling stomach. It sounds like he swallowed a tiger so I don't know how he can be hungry.

"It's too late to have pizza delivered", Esme says while glancing up at the clock on the wall. It's 12:47. I didn't know it was this late. "And the cafeteria is closed... I wouldn't suggest eating anything out of their anyway, hunny."

"I had some pudding from there earlier that tasted... not too horrible. After you scrape off the part that has the texture of plastic it's actually edible."

"Emmett, pudding shouldn't contain a plastic like substance.", Edward says with scrunched brows.

"That's why you scrape it off.", Emmett replies, like it's that obvious...

"There's a vending machine just down the hall.", I offer after giving an Emmett a 'what the fuck?' look. "I can go get us some chips or something."

They all nod their heads okay and I get up from my place at Alice's side. I stop halfway to the door and turn back to face them, "Oh, and if she wakes up-"

"We'll scream.", They say in unison. I smile proudly at how well trained they are and walk out the door.

When I get in the hall I pull my wallet out the back pocket of my pants to see how much cash I have. Well, there's actually something in it. So there's a plus. After I put my wallet away I look up and instantly stop dead in my tracks.

My insides start to shake with nothing but pure hate and anger.

"What the fuck are you doing here?", I ask through clenched teeth.

Jasper takes a step back. Good. He should be scared.

"I heard that Alice was here and I came to see how she is."

I can't help but laugh and sound slightly insane in the process. "You came to see how she is? Now that's just fucking funny."

"I'm really worried about her."

"Aaaaand the funny just keeps coming."

He glances towards Alice's room and takes a step forward and I place myself in his path with my arms crossed over my chest.

"Bella, I just want to see-"

"You take one more step and I will kill you.", my voice is so hard but the truth of my words don't go unnoticed by Jasper, "You and I both know I have no problem with that. In fact, I'd _really_ enjoy it. So maybe you should take a step."

Jasper just stands perfectly still, not taking me up on my challenge. He looks like he hasn't slept in days. Oh well. He wont be getting any sympathy from me.

"I didn't mean to hurt her. I swear.", his voice shakes with remorse with each word, "It, it happened so fast I.. one second she was standing and then the next she was on the floor... not moving. Not saying a word. I didn't know what to do. The fact that I was the one who did it made it all so much worse. I never thought I could hurt someone like that. Especially her. I-"

"If I were you I'd stop talking.", I'm trying so hard to keep myself steady. He better be lucky we're in a hospital so if I do happen to beat the shit out of him doctors might get to him before I kill him. "You don't get the right to explain yourself or your actions to me. And you sure as hell don't get the right to see Alice. So if that was your reason for coming here, you wasted your time. Especially since I plan on calling the cops so they can come get you out of my sight for good."

"That's not why I came. And calling the police wont be necessary."

My eyes narrow and now I'm actually interested in what he has to say. When he sees that I have no intention of stopping him from talking, he continues....

"After all that has happened, I now know there is something wrong with me. Something that needs to be tend to. It's like there's a monster living under my skin and I can't control it. And that scares me. I don't want to hurt anyone, Bella.... not again. I need help so I'm going to find that. I'm going to live with what I did for the rest of my life and I know I deserve it. I know a sorry wont change anything. It'll probably just get me another punch in the face so I'm just going to skip the whole sorry part.", he then looks to his left and nods his head, signaling for someone to come out.

Confusion takes over my face when I see a cop walking around the corner, but then when Jasper places his hands behind his back and the cop locks them in place with cuffs I realize what's going on.... Jasper turned himself in.

"The reason I came her tonight was to tell you that I've turned myself in.", see! I told you!

Wow. I can't believe it. My mouth opens and closes as I try to find something to say.

He smiles a little at my reaction, "Goodbye Bella." And with that he turns to walk down the long hall to the exit of the hospital with the officer securely holding a hand on the middle of his back.

I stare in disbelief at his form getting farther and farther away. I never thought I'd be at a loss for words right now. Seeing Jasper being escorted out the door by a cop would normally have me acting like I won the Superbowl. But the fact that he did it himself is really throwing me off...

I'm instantly pulled out of my confusing thoughts though when I hear my name being screamed from Alice's room. Oh god... could it really be happening?

When I run into her room, almost busting my ass in the process because the floors were recently mopped, I frantically look over to Alice and I see her moving slightly.

My eyes grow wide and my heart starts pounding against my chest when I see her eyelids moving from side to side like they could open at any second. I walk past Esme, Emmett, and Edward, never taking my eyes off of Alice. When I reach her side I sit down in the chair and take her hand in mine. I squeeze her hand softly, encouraging her to open her eyes while I sit on the edge of my chair.

Suddenly she stops moving and I take in a sharp breath. This suspense is killing me.

"Alice?", I softly call out to her. I can feel the intense gazes of everyone else burning down on us, waiting to see if she'll grace the room with her gorgeous eyes.

My heart jumps when I feel Alice's hand close around mine.

"Bella...", her weak voice manages to ring through out the room and tears instantly fall from my eyes and down my cheeks as a smile tugs on my lips. I hear the sound of breaths being released and without having to look I know everyone else is crying happy tears too. This was a moment that at times we all thought would never come. No matter how much we tried not to think it, we all knew in the back of our minds there was a possibility she wouldn't pull out of this.... but she did. She's here. Alice is finally here.

She softly says my name again as her eyelids open, revealing those big, beautiful eyes I was afraid I'd never get the chance to see again.

"I'm here baby. I'm here.", I choke out. Relief washes over me and I feel like I might breakdown from all the emotion that is running through. I sob happily as she looks into my eyes. Thank you. If there really is someone out there watching over all of us, thank you _so much_.

"Bella.", her voice is so soft and scratchy, I guess from not using it the last few days, "I felt like I couldn't find you... I couldn't find you for the longest time.", she then smiles as a tear falls, "but here you are. I finally found you."

My lip quivers as I lean down to place a soft kiss on her lips, my eyes closing instantly as I take in the feeling. Like so many others, I was afraid I'd never get to have this feeling again.

"I'll always be here, baby.", I whisper as I wipe her tears away. "How do you feel?"

Confusion crosses her face, "Is it weird that I feel tired?"

I breathe out a laugh as another tear drops, "It's a little odd." she smiles up at me as she giggles too. The sound hits me and sends shivers down my spine.

The sound of laughs coming from all through the room reminds me that there were others here too. Once Alice opened her eyes the rest of the world disappeared and it seemed like it was just me and her....

We both turn our heads to face them and we're met with happy smiles and tear filled eyes.

"Hey mommy.", Alice smiles over at Esme as she walks to the other side of Alice's bed. She takes her other hand and they just stare into each others eyes. Not needing to say a word.

"Someone should go get Carlisle.", Edward's right. Oh he'll be ecstatic to see Alice.

"I'll do it.", Emmett says and as soon as he runs out into the hallway I see his hands waving all through out the air as he tries to keep balanced, and then his ass hits the floor.

My mouth flies open as I laugh so hard I almost fall out my chair. I point a finger at Emmett's embarrassed face as everyone else fails miserably at trying not to laugh.

"Did you not see that 'wet floor' sign, Emmett!", I ask while I catch a breath. This is what he gets for laughing when I fell out the bed this morning. "Payback is one hell of a big ass bitch!"

Emmett blushes a bright red and then jumps up from the floor.

"I'm so glad I was awake to see that.", Alice laughs out. I look down at her adorable face and happiness swallows me.

Things are starting to look brighter in Forks already.

...............

**=D WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! So how was it????**


	16. Back Home

**Okay, first I want to say, to breyton4life, I went to upload this chapter to the docx thingy like you explained, and when it asked for me to connect to a user and I typed in your name and you weren't like 'available' or something... I forgot exactly what it said. I tried it twice and it wouldn't work! -_-. I must be doing something wrong though because your directions were very clear. It has to be me and my ignorance lol... and i STILL haven't seen you on MSN! What the smurf?? lol. Oh, and if anyone else wants my email so we can IM all ya gotta do is ask =D I'd love to talk to all my awesome readers! **

**Second, I want to say again THANK YOU! I love reading all of your reviews they always lift my mood =D. I'd really appreciate it if EVERYONE would leave some kind of feedback. That would be great. Good or bad I want to hear what all of you have to say so don't be shy!**

**Oh and this story isn't ready to come to an end yet. ;). So for those of you who think it's almost over, it's not. Bella and Alice still have somethings in store for them...**

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"I think it's time to go. I wanna go. Can we go?"

I place a steady hand on Alice's bouncing shoulder trying my best to keep her still.

"Alice, calm down baby. You heard what Carlisle said. You gotta stay for one more night."

"Oh, what does he know!", she says with a frown as she crosses her arms to pout. It's so damn cute.

"Quite a bit, actually.", Carlisle chimes in from across the room while examining some paper work. "I am a doctor after all." He looks over his shoulder to smile and Alice shoots him a playful glare.

"I'm fine though.", Alice wines as she falls back in the bed. "You asked me what my name was and I knew that, I know who the president is, I-"

"You didn't know how many fingers I was holding up.", Emmett adds as he leans against the door frame.

Alice turns her head towards Emmett and I don't know if the glare she's wearing now is meant to be a joke or not, "That's because you kept flashing your fingers in front of my face as fast as you could.", she moves her tiny, slender fingers the same way Emmett did earlier and says in a dopey voice, "How many fingers am I holdin' up?"

"I so don't sound like that."

"No, you sound just a tad bit deeper.", I tell Emmett while holding my thumb and pointer fingers together with just a little space between them.

"Not helping, Bella.", he says blankly while Alice is still doing her crazy finger flashing.

"Shut up Emmett and get closer."

"Why?"

"Because I'm trying to send you into a seizure."

A laugh bursts from me as I watch Alice concentrate even harder. Emmett lets his mouth gape open while placing a hand over his heart mockingly.

"Well _someone_ is an evil little Tinkerbell. What happened, did you get pixie dust shoved up your booty?"

"Emmett, stop taunting your sister. Alice, stop trying to kill your brother.", Carlisle says without looking up from his paper.

"We're in a hospital and you're a doctor! Just let me choke him just a little.", Alice reaches her hands out as far as they will go while Emmett gets in grabbing distance but jerks back if Alice's fingers graze his throat.

By now I'm holding on to the side of Alice's bed because I'm laughing so hard. Emmett better be lucky Alice is still too weak to jump out of bed because I'm sure she'd have him on the floor screaming uncle if she was up to full strength.

I look up when I hear Emmett yelp.

"AH! She's got me! She's got me! Dad get her!", some how Alice managed to get Emmett into a head lock and she's got the biggest smirk on her face.

Oh my god my face is hurting from laughing this hard. I wouldn't be able to help him even if I wanted to because I can't stop laughing long enough to work my limbs.

"Ow seriously! She's got a death grip on my hair!", Emmett winces and Carlisle lets out a sigh and crosses the room.

"Alice if you don't let him go I'll extend your stay here."

The smirk is instantly wiped off her face as she takes her arms from around Emmett's head, causing him to hit the floor with a loud thud.

Carlisle grins and pats Alice gently on the shoulder, "Good girl."

Emmett pulls himself up off the floor and rubs his head with a frown, "Damn, Alice. One more good yank and you would've created a bald spot."

"Now you know what I'm capable of.", she says with an innocent smile

"No. I knew what you were capable of when we were 9 and you replaced my toothpaste with Vagisil.", His eyebrows pull together at the memory, "You had a twisted mind even as a child."

"It's not my fault you were too dumb to read the label.", she chuckles, "Huh, it's kinda funny the things that stick with us as we get older. I still have a twisted, brilliant mind. And you're still an idiot."

His attempt at a threatening glare fails when he blushes and tries to hold in a laugh.

"Okay you two need to stop before I piss my pants!", I squeak out while trying to catch a breath. I remember that night Alice pulled the toothpaste prank on him because that was one of the many nights I slept over. That afternoon he took his water gun and shot us unexpectedly when we walked out the house. So naturally we had to get him back. And I think we got him _very_ good.

"Oh I'm not done yet.", Alice says with a devious smile, "Hey, Em. You remember that time when we were little and you were soooo excited for the tooth fairy to come that night?"

Emmett's eyes go wide and he looks stunned, "Tink you are so not right."

Her smile stays intact as she ignores Emmett's begs for her to stop, "Well, you weren't so excited anymore when I told you not only does the tooth fairy take your baby teeth, but she also steals your dic-"

"Ooooookay that's quite enough of memory lane." Carlisle announces as he jumps from his chair to shut the door as three small kids walk past with their mom, looking curiously into the room. "I'm going to go get some coffee and see what your mother is up to.", he re-opens the door and quickly walks out. He'll probably never sit in a room alone with us again.

"Thanks so much for that, babe. I needed a good laugh.", I wipe the couple of tears that escaped while I was laughing my ass off and lean down to give her a soft kiss.

She runs her tongue over her top lip and grins, "It must have been really boring when I was out."

I roll my eyes and giggle, "You have no idea what it was like without you."

* * *

Nothing can describe how amazing it is to have my arms wrapped around Alice and to feel her snuggle as close to me as she can. When she was still, well, I'm going to say "in a deep sleep", there was nothing. She never reacted to my touch or arched her back into my center when I stroked her stomach. She never shivered when I whispered into her ear or giggled at some of the things I would say. And now that my own personal Sleeping Beauty is finally awake from her deep slumber, I've made a mental note to not take any of the little things she does when I simply touch her for granted. I was so close to losing her forever... I don't want to go through an experience like that ever again....

"Baby you should go to sleep.", I place a soft kiss on her shoulder and she smiles happily while her eyes flutter shut and open again after my lips pull away.

"I can't. I'm so anxious for tomorrow."

"If you close your eyes and actually keep them shut tomorrow will get here a whole lot quicker."

"I was asleep for like 4 days. Sleeping is the last thing I want to do.", she flinches when I take in a sharp breath and turns her head to see what's wrong.

"Are you okay?"

I look into her concerned eyes and smile slightly, "No. I don't like it when you make jokes like that. Seeing you motionless for so long really hit me deep and it was far from funny."

Alice turns her body so she's facing me fully, "Oh... I'm sorry, Bella. I wasn't thinking. I'm just trying to keep things light ya know? I don't want you to worry anymore because all that is of the past and-"

My lips silent her rambling and the sound of our moaning and light smacks fill the quiet room. When we pull away her mouth is still slightly open and her eyes are closed.

"Damn, I'm one hell of a kisser. I can silence you and leave you stunned with the power of my own lips.", I smirk cockily.

"Or maybe I'm just one hell of an actor.", she retorts.

"Oh really?", I ask with a raised eyebrow.

"Yep. All those orgasms", she leans her head closer to whisper, "I faked them."

"Ouch, my pride.", she giggles when I hold my chest like I just got punched.

"So, what time is it?", I knew she wasn't going to let the room stay quiet for too long.

"Time for you to go to sleep.", believe me when I say I want to spend the entire night looking into her eyes, but she needs her rest.

"Oh har har very funny. Now really what time is it?"

I sigh and look at the clock on the wall, "It's almost 2."

"Are you flippin' serious?", she exclaims quietly so she doesn't wake up the other patients who are actually sleeping, "I thought it was 2 o'clock like, 2 hours ago. There clock must be broken."

A yawn escapes from me and I put my hand over my mouth since Alice's face is only a few inches from mine. I don't know if my breath smells funky or not, but I don't want to chance it.

"Bella, are you tired?"

"A little bit." Honestly I'm exhausted.

She pulls me closer so my head is cushioned on her chest. I moan softly and she giggles as I graze my nose over her boobs and use one of my hands to fluff them like a pillow.

"Comfortable?", she questions with an amused smile.

"Very.", I sigh contently as she runs her fingers softly through my dark hair. If she keeps this up I'll be asleep very soon.

"I love you.", from the sound of her voice I know sleep is finally catching up with her.

"I love you too."

Even though I was standing on the edge of the sleeping cliff, I didn't jump until I heard and felt Alice breathing softly, signaling that she finally closed her eyes for the night(well, morning if you want to get technical.).

The sound of her heart beating softly against my ear lulled me into an instant deep sleep.

* * *

**APOV**

"Bella, wake up baby." Okay. Whispering to her is obviously not working because she's still snoring... not to mention drooling all over my rack. Nice.

"Beeellllaaaaaa.", I sing while gently shaking her arm. I hate to wake her up, but Carlisle came in about an hour ago and said that I was free to go when I'm ready. And I am way past ready. She looks so adorable though. Oh well. She can sleep when we get home.

"Bella!"

"DON'T PET THE BEAVER!", Her head shoots up and she has a crazed look on her face while her eyes move frantically from side to side. It's _hilarious_.

I try to keep my lips glued together with a grin so I don't laugh. But when does that ever work?, "Uh, don't pet the beaver?"

"You don't wanna know.", she lets out a breath and uses the back of her hand to wipe the drool off the corner of her mouth. "So why did you wake me up."

She sends a glare my way when I don't stop laughing, "Bella, is that any way to talk to the person who saved you from a beaver attack?"

My hand reaches up to grasp onto her wrist when she makes an attempt to get out of bed, "Don't go! I'll tell you. Carlisle said that I can leave."

"We can go?", the hopeful tone in her voice and her morning hair is so damn cute. I hate that I went days without seeing her like this.

"Yup. He's working on my discharge papers now.", I pull her back down in a laying position and form to her like a second skin.

"Good. Because I don't think these beds were meant for two people.", she frowns while rubbing her back, "I'm so ready to get home. I can practically hear my bed calling my name. Well, I guess I should say _our_ bed."

My attention is pulled off of where Bella's shorts are ridding up her thighs and up to her eyes, "So it's official? I'm really moving in?"

"Should I assume something different?", she asks with puzzlement that is quickly replaced with a grin. My lips meet hers in a deep kiss to 'seal the deal'.

"When you're up to it we can move some of your stuff in. And when I say _some_ I mean like, essentials because my apartment is only so big."

"And you should know that all my stuff is essential.", I can't leave anything behind. That would be like leaving memories behind!

Her eyes narrow on me and says, "We'll talk about this later."

For the next few minutes we just lay together in silence while we play with each others fingers. I know the perfect place where my fingers want to play...

She stares at me with a cocked eyebrow when I take my hand away from her to slowly run it down her clothed stomach.

"My phones ringing.", she mumbles more to herself as she reaches over to retrieve her cell, "Hello? Hey dad. Yea we'll be heading home soon..."

I use her distraction as the perfect opportunity to finish my finger journey down south...

"I'm not sure, Charlie. I'll have to-", a gasp escapes at the same time my digits slip inside her and I smile innocently.

"Uh, Charlie? I'll-", her eyes slam shut and she swallows hard when I curl my fingers, hitting her in the right spot. "I'll have to call you back."

"What are you doing?", she asks as soon as she closes her phone.

"What does it look like I'm doing?", I challenge back with my innocent smile still covering my face.

"It looks like you're going to get us in trouble. What if your dad walks in?", her concern is drowned out by a moan full of pleasure when I massage her clit.

"Oh, come on Bella. You're telling me you've never wanted to have sex in a hospital?"

"Not one of my fantasies involve a hospital with your father walking the halls.", I know she's actually enjoying it no matter how much she protests, but she does look a little awkward and nervous so I'm not going to force her.

"Just think, what are the odds of him walking in on us?", I ask after I removed my fingers. Before Bella has time to answer a knock is heard...

"Alice I have your papers ready so you can leave.", my dad announces after sticking his head through the door and then walking off again.

A smirk plays on the corner of Bella's lip as she crosses her arms over her chest, "So, what were you asking?"

"Shut up I know.", I tell her blankly.

* * *

**BPOV**

"Okay, Alice. You're all ready to go home. I know you'll miss this place though.", Carlisle smiles and hands me Alice's paper work while she gets settled in her wheelchair. I don't know why she has to leave in one but Carlisle recommended it. So best not to argue with a doctor right? Even though doctors sometimes don't know what the hell they're talking about.... well, he _is_ her dad so I guess I'll side with him.

"Oh yea. I'll miss it like an itchy fungus."

"Nice, babe.", I tell her with my eyebrows scrunched together in disgust.

Carlisle hugs me, Esme, Emmett, and places a kiss on the top of Alice's head as he tells us goodbye then walks back through the sliding glass doors of the hospital.

"Quick! Lets go before he changes his mind.", Alice says while tightening her hands on the wheels of the chair to move. I giggle when she looks up at me with confusion when she stays in the same spot. "He gave me a defective chair! That meanie."

"The brake locks are on, sweetie.", I smile and flick the locks loose and then get behind her to push.

"I don't know about the rest of you, but I am SO glad we're leaving."

We all look at Emmett with deadpan stares.

His smile twitches a little and he says, "So I guess it's not just me?"

"I worry about you sometimes, hunny.", Esme places a hand on Emmett's shoulder while I try to hide my smile by looking the opposite way.

"_Sometimes_?", Alice asks while turning her head to face them. Emmett sends her a glare and she turns back around with a smile. "I kinda like this. Being pushed around in a wheelchair I mean."

"Want me to pop a wheelie?", I ask and she turns around to stare up at me with the most adorable, bright smile. God she's so beautiful.

"Bella.", I look over at Esme and she's shaking her head no. "We just got her out of the hospital. She doesn't need to go back because she busted her bottom."

Emmett snorts a laugh and he mumbles to himself, 'bottom'.

"The hospital is a place I don't see myself visiting again.", Alice says as she stands up to get inside Esme's car.

"And you wont have to.", I tell her after giving her a quick kiss, earning another perfect smile.

Oh fuck I hope we didn't just jinx ourselves....

* * *

_***4 DAYS LATER***_

"A little to the left... Now up a little. Wait go that way. No, _that_ way. There, stop! That's perfect."

I let out a huff when I hammer in the last nail to hold up the shelf, "About time.", I step back beside Alice to examine it, what the..., "Uh, Alice, it's in the same spot I started in."

She smiles and rocks side to side a little when I turn my head to face her.

"You were staring at my ass weren't you?", I ask when she doesn't respond.

"You have such a lovely ass.", she giggles and I roll my eyes playfully.

"Holy spit this box is heavy.", Emmett breathes out as he drops the last box I had in my truck down on the living room floor., "What the hell is in it?"

"Shoes.", Alice says as she walks into the kitchen to get, I'm guessing another pudding cup.

He narrows his eyes at the box, "Is she serious?"

"That's not even all of them.", I laugh dryly, "If I let her bring all of them we'd have no space for anything else." I swear Alice could probably sell all her shoes and have enough money to buy a small child.

"Is that everything?"

"Yea. Rosalie dropped off her other things last night."

"Soooooo I'm guessing you don't need me and my large guns anymore.", he asks while flexing his biceps.

"No you can go.", I chuckle, "Thanks for all your help. We really appreciate it. Oh, and tell Rose I said thank you again."

"Will do.", he gives me a big hug and calls out a goodbye to Alice who is still in the kitchen, "Take care of my little sis, Bells."

"You know I will.", I walk him to the door and wave as he pulls out the drive. I should probably make the bed since I bought new sheets last night. They're dark red Egyptian cotton sheets and they go great with my black comforter. Very sexy.

"Oh I feel so sleepy.", Alice yawns as she walks into the bedroom and wraps her arms around me from behind as I lay the top sheet across the bed. "So there's really no need to make the bed. I'm just going to mess it up again."

"I guess carrying two boxes in and eating all my pudding really takes a lot out of a person."

"Hello, it's _our_ pudding."

"I bought that pudding _before_ you moved in. So technically it's _my_ pudding.", I tell her with a smirk as I turn around in her arms to run my hands along her back.

"What happened to what's mine is yours and what's yours is mine?", she questions with a smirk of her own.

"Fine you win.", I giggle before kissing her soft lips and she opens her mouth for my tongue. Mmmmm, chocolate pudding. "All joking aside, you've been pretty tired since we left the hospital. Are you okay?"

"I'm fine, sweetie. Maybe it's a normal thing.", she shrugs and then crawls into bed.

Maybe she's right. Maybe being tired is just something that comes along with recently getting out of a coma.

...maybe

* * *

_***TWO DAYS LATER***_

"Ooooh, right there baby.", I smile into Alice's neck and give it a nip as I thrust my fingers faster into her warm, wet center. I've missed the feel of her so much. We haven't had sex in a while so we're both ready to explode. The only time we even got close to being sexual was the day Alice was released from the hospital and she tried to finger me there. I'm still kicking myself in the ass for not letting her do it.

A moan leaks from my lips and tickles her neck as I grind against Alice's thigh while she digs her nails into my ass, forcing me to move faster.

"Ah fuck Bella, I'm gonna- I'm gonna... I'm gonna puke!" What the fuck????? Before I have time to say anything she pushes me to the side and at the speed of lightning I see her little self dart into the bathroom.

"Alice? Are you okay?", I ask while trying to tune out the sound of her emptying her stomach into the toilet. I cover myself with the sheets when I feel the cool air hit my chest. It was so hot a minute ago when Alice was moaning and whimpering underneath me. Now it's pretty chilly.

I hear the toilet flush and then look up to see Alice walking to the bed while wiping her eyes with her thumb.

"Yea... I'm fine.", she breathes out.

"What was that all about?", I ask while pulling the sheets around us.

"I don't know. It just happened out of nowhere."

"Uh, yea. It really did.... maybe you shouldn't have had two Happy Meals and chocolate chip cookies for dinner."

"I was hungry.", she frowns and I can't help but giggle. It's so weird she's been eating a lot lately.

"Wait, you don't wanna finish?", she asks when I get myself comfortable to fall asleep.

"Call me crazy but I'm not really in the mood anymore.", I tell her and she gives me a look that has 'are you fucking serious?' written all over it. When she sees that I'm not going to change my mind she falls back against her pillow and snuggles into my arms.

"Fine... love you, Bella."

"Love you too."

* * *

The next morning I woke up feeling... cold. I sat up in bed and a familiar fear ran over me. _Where's Alice?_ I let out a needed breath and calmness washed over when I see her walking out of the bathroom. _She'll never leave you...._

"Morning.", she smiles weakly.

"Are you going somewhere?", I ask when I see that she's all ready dressed and ready for the day.

"Yea. I want to ask dad about something. I need to talk to him."

"Oh, well then I'll come with-"

"No.", she says while holding up a hand that stops me when I swing my legs over the side of the bed.

"Why not?", I don't understand why I can't go with her.

"Because it's nothing. I don't want you to worry about anything.", she giggles nervously, "I could be wrong about all this anyway."

She crosses the room and kisses my forehead and my narrow eyes follow her to the door.

"I'll be back later. I love you, Bella."

"I love you.", I say to an empty room.

What's going on?

* * *

"So she just walked out?", Ashley asks after grabbing our frappuccinos off the counter and handing me mine. I had to get out and talk to someone about all this. I knew instantly I had to come to Ashley...

I nod my head while taking a sip, "She's been so distant. I'm really worried."

"And you said she's been sleeping a lot and her eating habits have changed?", I watch as she thinks deeply on all that I've told her.

"It's like she has the munchies 24/7.... What do you think?", I run a hand through my hair while bouncing my right leg. I can't help but feel a little nervous... okay a lot nervous.

Her lips open and close back as she changes her mind on what she was about to say. Ashley's eyes find mine and her hand comes across the table to hold the hand that's not currently in my hair,

"I think she'll tell you.", she whispers while smiling softly. Okay, I'm completely oblivious....

What the _hell_ is going on????

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**I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Let me know what's on your mind =)**


	17. Time With Ashley and A Hospital Visit

**ATTENTION! ATTENTION! I AM NOT DEAD! **

**Heeeelllloooo everyone! I could say sorry in every language known to man and it wouldn't be good enough.... but I'm going to say sorry anyway. I am so, so, SO sorry for how long it has taken me to update my story. Life has been CRAZY and I had no choice but to put the story on the back burner. Instead of going into detail, I'll just give you a quick run down of what's been up with me...**

**Well, work has been hellacious first off. I've been called in so much because one of the girls walked out one day. The bitch just WALKED OUT. Didn't say a smurfin' word! So me and one of the other girls had to take over what she had to do that day WHILE we did all our stuff and work life went down hill from there -_-. The only plus is that I got a lot more hours on my paycheck so HOORAY FOR MONEY! =D. **

**And every single day between the last time I updated and now, I have been with my best friend except maybe one of those days. We pretty much always hang out constantly but since she was so close to her due date(oh yea, she was pregnant with her second baby =)), we were extra close. And yesterday she gave birth to a beautiful baby girl! =D so that makes two sweet baby girls. **

**So this whole chapter(which I hate because of how smurfin' short it is =/) was written up tonight because this is the first free day I've had in a good long while. I really hope I still have readers LOL. **

**I don't know when I'll be able to update again. Hopefully it wont be as long as last time. But if my friend needs me I'm going to be there for her so just please hang in there with me because I have NOT abandoned this story.**

**Oh, and I noticed that some of you wanted my MSN so we can IM, so instead of just emailing it to those of you who wanted it, I'll just post it here and anyone who wants to talk feel free to send me a message =) I love talking to people! So here it is: ThisYearsGirl89()live(.com) just take out the parenthesises(I probably just butchered the hell out of that word).  
**

**Tomorrow if I have time I'm going to work on the next chapter =) So don't shoot me... yet. lol**

**Kay, I'm gonna shut up now:**

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I feel completely out of the loop like everyone except me knows this big secret. And I know there's something I'm clearly _not_ getting because it's written all over Ashley's face.... I don't even know why I'm bent all out of shape over this anyway. I'm sure I'm not really the only one who doesn't know.... I swear if Emmett knows what's going on then I'm really going to question if my brain is functioning properly....

"Enough about me and Alice and all our possible drama, how have you been?", I ask Ashley as I lean back in my chair. I can already feel the headache that is bound to creep on me if our conversation on Alice's odd behavior continues.

"Well, I'm doing very well in my classes. I'd bet my entire college fund that one of my professors would love to see that change.", I giggle as she glares down at the straw in her drink, giving it a flick and probably wishing it was his head.

"Which one of your teachers is out to get you? I'll write an angry letter to the school, go to send it, change my mind, and then just deliver it myself to the guy and when he opens the door I'll punch him in the throat.", I explain with narrow eyes and the best serious face I can muster up. And it worked like a charm because now Ashley is smiling brightly.

She places a hand over her mouth to try and mute her giggles, "You'd really do that for me?"

I give her a shrug and say bored, "I've been wanting an excuse to hit someone."

Ashley rolls her eyes and playfully kicks my knee under the table, getting a grin from me. She then straightens herself back up and clears her throat a bit, "But really if you could do that, that would be great. I'd love for him to come into class the next morning with a neck brace.", both her hands cup her mouth and her eyes go wide after she gives her straw a flick and it flies out of her plastic cup and hits the man sitting at the table next to ours.

"Oh my gosh I am _so_ sorry.", she says into her hands while her cheeks flush with embarrassment.

"Keep it in your damn cup next time.", he mumbles as he brushes off his jacket. Which I don't get at all because the fucking straw hit him in the back of the head and it didn't have anything on it. The asshole just thinks he's a big shot. Oooooh you carry a briefcase and type on your Black Berry while you sit in the coffee shop so you must be a 'somebody'. Give me a fucking break.

"Dude, it was an accident. She didn't come here with the intentions of hitting you with a straw.", I shoot back completely annoyed and pissed off about how he's acting. Ashley stares wide eyed from across the table while I stare at the douche bag, waiting to see what he's going to do next.

"Just be lucky it didn't hit my phone.", He says with an attitude that is just making my temper worse.

"It was a fucking _straw_.", Ashley's hand finds my wrist as my voice begins to rise which gets attention from everyone else in the shop. She never was one for confrontation, but damn it he's not going to talk to her like this and act like his shit doesn't stink.

"Who bought you that phone anyway? Your mom?" I can't believe I just made a "your momma" joke, but it did embarrass him. Ha, maybe his mom really did buy it.

"Bella.", Ashley hisses while yanking on my wrist, "It's not worth it. Please." I agree to end the argument, if you even wanna call it that, and head towards the exit with her... Only because the way she said 'please' made me think of when we had sex and she would beg me to stop teasing her... oh mind, how easily you roll into the gutter.

I look over my shoulder and call out to the guy, "Oh and by the way, when you stand up to leave you might want to bend over. I think your personality is hiding out in your ass."

What? Did you _really_ think I was going to walk out without the last word?

..........

"What kind of ice cream do you want?", I ask Ashley while I examine the board. Hmmm. Is it a chocolate day? Or vanilla?

"Oh I don't want any, thanks though."

I take my eyes off the board to face Ashley, "Don't even lie. You know your ass wants some."

Her left eyebrow raises slightly as the corner of her mouth does the same, turning into an amused grin, "I'm certain my ass is fine."

"We _all_ know your ass is fine.", I smirk as she scoffs at my comment, her grin turning into a full smile. "Seriously, pick something before I pick for you. And by that I mean I'm going to pick what you hate most."

She lets out a defeated sigh and tells the bored looking girl at the counter she wants a vanilla cone and I get a hot fudge sundae... I decided that it's a chocolate _and_ vanilla kinda day.

"Am I the only one who finds it funny that we left a coffee shop to visit an ice cream shop?", She questions as we sit at a booth.

"Nope. Just you.", I send her a smile after I lick the ice cream from my thumb, letting her know that I found it amusing too.

After I take a big bite of my sundae, I look around the room, "It looks like this place is prick free, so I guess I'll be able to finish talking to you without the possibility of throwing blows."

"That was so embarrassing."

"Don't be. If anyone should be embarrassed it should be him. I was so close to kicking him off his high horse."

"Why is it always a high horse?", she asks brightly while tearing apart a piece of her napkin.

"I don't know.", I tell her with a shrug. "...Maybe a high donkey?"

"That wouldn't work.", her nose crinkles up as she concentrates, "donkeys are too short to be called 'high donkeys'."

"You're thinking way too much into this.", I chuckle. She tosses her napkin pieces into the trashcan beside the table as she laughs too.

Ashley quickly reaches into her purse when it starts ringing, her smile becoming bigger as she reads the ID.

"Hello? Yes I was hoping you would call..."

I shuffle in my seat as I play with my sundae, trying not to make it obvious that I'm trying _really_ hard to hear who's on the other end. To hear who's making her this happy.

"Uhhhh yea I- I would love to! Tonight sounds great. Okay I'll see you then.", her smile is still shinning brightly even after hitting the END button on her phone.

"So, who is she?"

"What?", ha I knew that would stop her smiling.

"The girl that you're going out with tonight.", I tell her matter-of-factly.

"What makes you so sure there's a girl?", she challenges back with narrow eyes.

"Ashley, we dated for 2 and a half years. I know that smile."

Her smile this time is not as bright, but she can't deny how well I know her. "Yes. There's a girl." See. I told you. Am I good or what?

"How long have you two been dating?", I hate that hearing that she found someone is poking at my insides. I knew she would though. A girl as great as she is won't stay single long. I was born for Alice. It's as simple as that. I know it's corny and you can laugh if you want go ahead, I'll give you a second to get it out of your system... done? Kay. So why am I feeling like this? Are the annoying little pokes coming from jealousy?

"I wouldn't say we're 'dating'.", she starts while doing air quotes with her fingers, "We've just been talking for a little while and we went out for lunch once after classes and this will be our second date. If you count lunch as the first date that is."

"Can I meet her?", oookay that came out a little too forceful.

"No... Not yet at least.", she adds after seeing the look on my face. "Lets see what this turns into before I introduce her."

"Fair enough.", I just want to make sure she's good enough for Ashley. Maybe scare her a little like a dad would do to their daughter's first date.... huh, I guess that's where the little pokes come from. I'm protective over her.

The buzzing of my phone against my thigh causes me to jump out of my thoughts. I don't even need to look to see who it is. I just got that feelin'.

"Hey sweetie. ..Why are you there, what's wrong? Are you okay? Yea I'm on my way. Love you too."

"What's wrong Bella?"

"I don't know.", I say distantly as I look into Ashley's concerned eyes., "Alice just called and said that she was at the hospital talking to Carlisle and now she needs me there. She needs to tell me something important."

A knowing smile crosses Ashley's beautiful face, "You better get over then."

"You're not gonna come with me?", she shakes her no.

"I have a feeling this is going to be something she needs to tell you without company.", Ashley whispers into my ear as her arms wrap around me.

Okay, the smile that's on her face is really starting to annoy me. It's one of those I-know-something-you-don't-know smiles and who doesn't hate those.

We say our goodbyes and I make my way to the hospital. The drive there could be used wisely. I could prepare myself for what she's going to tell me... but I've learned many times in the past that with Alice, there's no point in attempting to prepare yourself. Because she always surprises you.

So what surprise am I in store for this time?

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**I thought all the Ashley fans out there would like this one =)**

** and again, sorry for the shortness of it. I intended on putting Alice's confession(of course all of you know what it is already haha.) in this chapter, but that would mean waiting another day or so and I wanted to give y'all something to let you know that I'm still out there lol. **

**Please let me know if you're still hangin in! =D**

**OH! And I already have ideas for another Bella & Alice story ;). Who knows when I'll be able to write it, but it's floating around in my mind.**

**Thanks so much for reading and I hope to have the next chapter up soon. But with how things are going I don't know if I'll get my way or not.**


	18. Confession and Decision

**GAAAAHHHHH I hate that it took me forever AGAIN to get a chapter out! Forgive me?*Does best puppy dog smile* lol. I'm sorry y'all, but time has not been my friend lately -_-.**

**Thanks so much for still reading. It means a lot! And thanks so much for the great reviews =D.**

**I hope you like this chapter and the story goes in the direction that you want=)**

**And I'm sorry that my last couple chapters haven't been as long as I usually make them. But since I haven't had enough time in one sitting to write enough to make it longer, I kinda gotta give what I can =/**

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I hate hospitals. Absolutely hate them. And here I am again walking through the front door and over to the information desk to find out where Alice is.

The woman at the desk looks up and when she sees me approaching she places her palm over her phone and says, "She's in her father's office." Without another word she jumps back into her conversation.

Since she didn't even give me a chance to ask who I was looking for, I close my mouth and arch a brow. Am I really that recognizable around this damn place? God I hate hospitals even more.... if that's possible.

"Ooookay. Thanks.", I turn slowly from the desk and walk down the hall to Carlisle's office.

On the walk over I debated on whether or not I should knock when I reached the door, of course I decided on just walking on in unannounced.I know, I have such awesome manners.

I always thought Carlisle had a large, comfortable office, but looking at it now it seems so small... maybe because Emmett, Carlisle, Esme, Edward and Rosalie are all crammed inside forming a circle around Alice who is sitting on top of Carlisle's desk with her head looking to the floor.

It looks like Esme has been crying. Oh no... I can feel my stomach starting to twist into tight knots. I don't think this is going to be good news. I don't think I can handle anymore heartbreak. Maybe I can just slip back out the door and they'll never know.... no, I can't do that. I'm not a pussy! I just have one. ha, wait, this is no time for me to be crackin' jokes in my head....

"Uh, hi.", I say uncomfortably after a short moment of waiting to see if anyone would notice that I entered the room. Now that all their eyes are on me I kinda liked it better before when I was basically just another piece of furniture in the room.

Alice pulls her head up and her wet eyes fall on me and she instantly looks... terrified.

"Not the expression I was hoping for.", I mutter with a light laugh, trying to cut through the tension thick air.

Esme's lips turn into a sad smile as she walks towards me, "Hello, Bella." I return the hug with confusion covering my face. Why does everyone look so nervous? Something is definitely not right.

When Esme pulls away, Emmett places his hand on my shoulder, giving it a soft squeeze while the others smile slightly. I don't like this. I want to get out of here.

"Alice, what's going on?", I ask growing more and more uncomfortable as my eyes flicker over everyone. They all pretty much share the same expressions.... Sadness and sympathy.

She takes in a shaky breath, "Bella.. I uh,...", her eyes drop to her hands that are clutched together in her lap, "I-.. oh god, I can't do this.", her voice cracks as a few fresh tears fall and at the same time I swallow a hard lump down my throat as I watch her. What's so bad that she doesn't have the strength to tell me?

Her sorrow filled eyes turn to Carlisle... looking desperately for some kind of help. He bends down to allow Alice to whisper something in his ear and he replies with an encouraging smile and a few words of his own. Now would be the moment I would give anything to have bionic hearing. Cause it might be the only way I'll figure out what the hell is up...

When Carlisle stands straight, I see Alice nodding her head as a tear falls. She takes in a few breaths, preparing herself. And I catch myself breathing in sync with her.

"Bella,", she tries again with a shaky start, but I think this time she's going to be able to finish, "there's something I have to tell you, and there's a chance you might not like it... but please, you have-"

"Just tell me Alice. I can't handle the suspense."

Her eyes blink a few times as another deep breath escapes. And then suddenly a wave of confidence and strength rolls over her and without missing another beat she says,

"I'm pregnant."

Everyones eyes focus on me as I stand in Carlisle's office, mouth agape like a fish out of water.

Alice is pregnant.

And it's not mine for obvious reasons.... which can only mean one thing.

... Jasper is the father.

I think I'm going to be sick. Scratch that, I _know_ I'm going to be sick.

"Bella, why don't you sit down. You look like you're on the verge of passing out.", Maybe it has something to do with the fact that I'm trying my best to hold down what I had for lunch...Carlisle slides out his desk chair and places it behind me, bracing it just in case my legs give out.

"Baby, please sit.", Alice whispers out as she scoots off of the desk.

"No, no I'd rather stand.", I see Alice flinch when I jerk my hand away from hers. Fuck I didn't mean to do that and now she looks like she's going to start crying again.

I can't seem to form the right words to describe what I'm feeling right now... I just can't do it. I do know my brain feels like it's being attacked by a swarm of angry bees... and it's only encouraging my blood pressure to rise...

"I'm going to find where ever Jasper is being kept, cut his dick off with a box cutter, throw it into a blender, push puree, and then force him to drink it."

The feel of discomfort is pulsing off of everyone as some shuffle their feet in place or cough uncomfortably into their palms. I don't give a flying fuck if what I said was uncalled for, I was just tired of awkward silence...

"Why a box cutter?", Emmett asks nervously.

"Do you really think something bigger is called for?", I ask with a deadpan stare. Emmett's hands immediately find his crotch as he winces while also trying to contain a chuckle. I steal a glance at Rosalie to see how she feels about my very detailed plan and little remark I made about her brother's lack of a package... but she's unreadable.

Out of the corner of my eye I see Alice hanging her head in shame as more silent tears roll down the length of her beautiful face. A part of me is urging me to run that short distance to her and wrap her in my arms while I whisper that everything is going to be okay... but then a small part of me feels so betrayed and it's stopping me. It's telling me that she doesn't deserve my comfort... and it's absolutely wrong.

"I think we should give Alice and Bella time to talk alone.", Carlisle announces as he motions for everyone to walk out the room.

"Yea. All the talk of dick dismemberment is making me want to flee.", Emmett says awkwardly.

"I concur.", Carlisle whispers as he shuts the door. Leaving behind only me and Alice.

"Did he rape you, Alice?", I ask after a couple minutes of silence. It's sad that I'm unsure of what answer I want to hear...

"No.", she breathes out as her weak eyes stay on me, "...and yes."

My eyebrows scrunch in confusion, "What do you-"

"He didn't force himself on me. Not exactly. But he did make it clear that it was going to happen whether I wanted it to or not."

"Did you want it?", I ask as I try to swallow back the venom that wanted to come out.

"Of course not.", she answers, obviously hurt, "Bella you shouldn't even have to ask. You are the only one that I want touching me."

"I had to hear you say it.", the little relief I feel is quickly pushed a side as reality of it all sinks in. I try to take in a hard breath while the tears I've been holding in break through, "I'm so sorry I wasn't able to stop him. Alice, I'm so, _so_ sorry."

In a flash Alice is in front of me cupping my face, "Ssshhh, baby it's not your fault. None of this is your fault.", she kisses my quivering lips and rests her forehead against mine.

"What are we going to do?", I ask in a small voice. "I feel so lost."

"Whatever we have to do.", she answers as if it's that easy. I'm so happy she's being the strong one right now. I know on the inside she's probably even more of a wreck than I am. But for my sake she's not showing it. "We're going to get through this.... now let's go home and we can talk more there."

I sniffle and nod my head okay as she takes my hand and walks us out the door.

* * *

On the silent ride home I calmed back down and now I feel... weak. Something I hate. I feel like I've failed.

"Bella, please talk to me." I ignore her as I close the apartment door after entering. I walk silently over to the couch with Alice following close behind. After finding the remote in one of the cushions I start channel surfing.

Alice just stands at the entrance to the living room watching me. It's a little annoying.

"Just say something!"

"ICarly is on.", I tell her blankly without taking my eyes off the tv.

Without even looking I know she's rolling her eyes, "That's not what I meant. Bella we have to talk about this."

"After ICarly.", I know this is a talk I'm not going to be able to avoid, but would putting it off till tomorrow really be that bad?

She then walks quickly over to the tv and turns it off. And just to annoy her I pick up the remote that's at my side and hit the power button.

Her eyes slam shut as she mumbles something too low for my ears and then yanks the cord out of the plug in.

I drop the remote and hold up my hands in defeat, "Fine. Lets talk."

"I know this has been a really emotional draining day for both of us and talking about all of it is the last thing you want to do, but it has to be done.", she sits on the couch beside me and I immediately take her into my arms, wanting to feel her close.

"There's one thing I don't want to ever bring up again though," I start before she has time to speak just in case the first thing out of her mouth is what I don't want to talk about, "and that's you and Jasper."

"Bella I swear I didn't want it to-"

"I know you didn't. I really do. I saw how hurt you were when you had to tell me and I don't want to see that look on your face again. So please, don't make me."

A little smile twitches at the corner of her mouth as she kisses me softly, "I just hope that you can forgive me."

"I do, baby.", I whisper back. What happened wasn't in her control.

"So, what about.. the baby."

I feel her stiffen up in my arms. Seems like she's having second thoughts about talking...

"Well, there are two options.", she says distantly.

"And they would be?", I don't know why I'm asking. Because I know the answers

"Having the baby is one, and the other is, well...", she looks down at our intertwining fingers...

"Abortion.", I finish for her in a whisper.

"Yes.", she answers back just as low.

I can see the sadness and discomfort on her face as she thinks about her last option. And I know I need to say something before she falls apart, "It wouldn't be like taking a life... not technically at least."

"But it _could_ have a life.", she shivers out. I know what's going through her head because it's also going through mine... and as horrible as the thought of abortion is, there are certain times when it needs to be considered. Like Alice's case...

"Lets think about it though, Alice. Let's say you have the baby, are you going to be able to live out your life looking into it's eyes and seeing Jasper? What if you can't handle it? What if because of that, you end up turning your back on the baby?", I can see in her eyes that she's thinking very hard on it, but her heart and mind are wanting two different things...

"I know that, sweetie. But if I did end it, what did I end for that life? That baby could' have grown up to become a brilliant person. That baby could have been talented. That baby could have been a doctor. That baby could have found a cure for cancer. That- that..", hard sobs rack over her and I feel wet tears splatter on my arm like rain drops. I pull her shaking form into me tighter... it's a huge decision to make, and it's destroying her... so it's destroying me.

"It's a lot to think about, love. But think about this too... we have a long, happy future together. So we could have our own baby. One that we plan for... One that happens when _we_ decide. We have time for all of that, Alice. So would you rather have a baby that was made by basically force? Or one out of love?"

The only thing heard in the room is our breathing and Alice's sniffles as my words linger. I know she's putting them into consideration even though we're both silent.

"It's just so much.", she hiccups.

"You'll do the right thing though.", I tell her sincerely as I stroke her arm lovingly.

"How do you know?"

"I just do.", I smile shyly and speak again, "like you told me the morning after my _wonderful _birthday party.. You're strong but when you're ready to fall, I will always catch you."

........

I park my truck into one of the many empty parking spots in the lot and cut off the engine. I look to my right at Alice. She's been quiet all morning. I expected the silence.... but I know she's making the right choice and so does she.

"Are you ready?", I ask her softly.

She jumps a little in her seat like my words startled her. I wouldn't be surprised if she forgot I was even in the truck with her...

"Yea.", she answers after letting out a deep breath.

After getting out, Alice walks over to my side and embraces me in a warm hug.

"I love you so much.", she whispers in my ear while standing on her toes.

"I love you too.", I reply while rubbing circles soothingly along her back.

"It's kinda ironic that the weather is so beautiful today.", she says while looking to the sky and squinting her eyes against the bright shinning sun. It really is a beautiful morning... There are no clouds covering the blue sky, the breeze is nice and cool, and the warm sun rays seem to tingle against your skin. Not regular Forks weather...

"Everything is going to be fine.", I assure her.

"I know.", she responds with a small smile.

And with that we both walk hand in hand across the parking lot and into the clinic...

* * *

***asks nervously* how was it? I think the majority of readers will like Alice's decision...**


	19. Going Through the Motions

**Wow. I hate that it has taken me so long to update. I'm so, so sorry. When I say I've had no time to write, I mean I've had NO time to write. Things have been beyond crazy. I just hope all my readers are still out there because again I say I have not given up on this story. Today was the only day I had time to just sit around and do whatever so I decided to write up a chapter for y'all. I wish I had time to write the new story I've been thinking about! But nooooo. I hardly have time to scratch my tit LOL. When I finish this story(Still not sure when) I'm going to work on the other one...**

**Again, sorry it has been so long...  
**

* * *

"Do you think we did the right thing?"

I look next to me where Alice sits, her nervous hands playing with a thread at the end of her shirt. She's asked me this question 4 times since we left the clinic.

"Yea.", I flick the turn signal on, barely pausing as I turn down the old dirt road, "in the end I think we really did."

One hand leaves the steering wheel to hold onto the tiny hand resting against the dusty truck seat. Her wet eyes look down at our joined hands and a few fresh tears fall. Right now she's regretting the decision. It's natural though. It's taking everything I have to not cry right along with her. But I have to stay strong for her. For both of us. The deed is done and we can't take it back. I'm not lying when I tell her over and over it was the right choice though. I know deep down it was. Some might call us monsters for what we've done. But those same people don't know Alice's past and what she's been through... and what happened. That prick forced himself onto her. _He_ is the monster...

"Bella, I'm just so tired. Tired of hurting. I'm tired of all this sadness." I glance to the passenger side when I hear her take in a sharp breath. She looks so defeated, like she's been pushed down over and over. But she always stands back up. Alice is a fighter. Out of all the shit she's had to endure, I think this tops it all...

I watch as she wets her lips, as teardrops leave a trail down her cheekbones with tear stained eyes, "Bella... when can we just be happy?"

My mouth parts slightly as I pull the truck off the road without breaking eye contact. Instantly she takes off her seatbelt and falls into my waiting arms as we both cry together. Her small hands run through my hair as my hands find her back, rubbing soothingly. Her hot tears and warm breath trickle against my neck as I cradle her.

Her question was a good one, when _can_ we be happy? How can so much happen to two people? Are we forever doomed to go through all the bad and never be gifted with just one moment to breathe? It's like we're in quicksand and it seems like we'll never reach the top...

Nothing is said as so many questions float around in my mind. We're just holding each other. Crying for it all. Wishing so much that this will be the end of the bad and soon a door will open for the good and we can walk through it hand in hand with welcoming smiles from whoever it is that opens the 'happy life doors'...

"I hope we didn't make a mistake.", Alice whispers distantly while staring off into the woods, "I know deep down we didn't. I know I wouldn't be able to give that child the love it would have deserved. Does that- does that make me a cruel person?"

"No baby of course not", I place a soft finger under her trembling chin to turn her gaze over her shoulder and towards me, "You are not a cruel person. You couldn't be if you tried." a pause, "you're just a person that has seen and been through a lot of cruel things. And you're not the first woman who has had this option on there plate and took it. Many women have felt the same feelings you're feeling. I guess what I'm trying to say is, you're not alone Alice."

She lets everything that I've said wash over her, "What would I do without you?"

My lips form into a little smirk, "I don't know, but lets not find out."

Alice's lips press into mine for a soft kiss. I think we're going to be okay...

Road side therapy, there's nothin' like it.

* * *

After we pulled ourselves together we got back on the road and now we're walking up to the Cullen house. I look down at Alice before I knock on the door, making sure she's ready. A silent nod is my cue. A few seconds later heavy foot steps are heard, no doubt it's Emmett.

"Hey you two.", he greets with his warm contagious smile. We both walk in and he closes the door behind us.

"Are mom and dad home?", Alice asks quietly as we make our way to the living room.

"Yea. We're all here.", her brother reassures and places a large, but gentle hand on each of our shoulders. It's funny how one touch from the big teddy bear can make a person feel at ease.

As we enter the living room 4 heads turn towards us. I never thought this house could be so silent. You can practically hear the air bouncing off the giant walls. I snake my arm around Alice's waist when she starts backing up slowly, ready to escape if necessary. Does she honestly think her friends and family are going to hate her? Well I know for a fact they wont because I already called and told everyone what we decided...

"Everything will be okay. I promise.", I whisper into her ear. She looks up and forces a weak smile. "I already told them."

Her eyes knit together in confusion, "What?"

"Bella has already informed us on your decision to cancel the pregnancy.", Carlisle announces.

Alice looks from her father and back to me, "You already told them? All of them?"

"Yes."

"Why?"

"Because I knew how hard it would be for you and that you assumed everyone would like, disown you."

"Can you blame me for thinking that?", she asks while looking down to the floor.

"Honey I can't wrap my head around why you think we would hold it against you", Esme says with her face mirroring her disbelief, "You were basically- you..." Esme's hand comes up to cover her mouth, unable to say the word. Alice walks across the room to wrap her arms around her crying mother.

"You're our daughter and we love you so much.", Carlisle states while taking them both into a fatherly embrace. "I'm so, so sorry I couldn't stop it."

"Daddy please, don't cry. Not both of you.", Alice looks into her father's eyes as he shows a rare moment of weakness.

I didn't even know I was crying again till Emmett took me into his strong arms, walking me over to join the family hug.

"Can we ever have a family moment without inviting tears?", Emmett chuckles lightly as he wipes a tear away before it falls. "Hey, you two, come bring your cryin' asses over here and join the hug!"

Without a second to reply, Emmett leans over and grabs both Edward and Rosalie, pulling them in as we all share a laugh.

"I swear, we're like the emo Brady Bunch.", Alice snorts and the laughter continues to grow.

"Except we don't have a maid.", her brother corrects.

Leave it to Emmett to turn one hell of a serious announcement into a laugh riot. Bless his heart.

* * *

"..And then we had a great, big group hug and compared ourselves to the Brady Bunch. The emo version."

I stare into Ashley's wide eyes as I take in a much needed breath. I didn't think I was going to be able to tell her everything in one long ass run on sentence but damnit I succeeded!

"Wow", is her only response and all I can do is smirk.

"Yea. I know right."

"Emo Brady Bunch huh?"

"Yup."

"More like the Crazy Bunch."

A french fry meets her forehead and she scoffs playfully.

"Throw that back. I still plan on eating it."

"Ooooof course you do.", she laughs and leans across the table to hand it to me but quickly changes her mind and pops it in her mouth.

"Hey! No fair I paid for that fry you.. British person you!"

"Next time don't throw it at me."

"What would you do if I stole your tea and crumpets?"

"What would you do if I threw them at you?", she challenges back with a raised eyebrow. "And you need to practice your British accent more. That was just rubbish."

"I would probably cry what with the broken glass and- and hot tea, oh! and the crumpets would just be destroyed- I only threw a french fry! Broken glass and hot liquid hurts!"

"Okay, okay we'll call it truce.", she laughs, "I still can't believe all of that happened 2 month ago... how are you and Alice holding up?"

The big smile I was wearing starts to fade a little as I think back, "We're uh, we're doing good. Now at least. The first couple of weeks after we went through with it were rough for both of us. One of us would bring it up or ask a question about it and we'd both end up in each others arms crying."

"And now?"

"Now, we still talk about it of course. But there are no more tears.", a hint of my smile starts to break through, "Now we just end up in each others arms."

"Bella arms are a good place to be.", she says softly with her own smile shinning brightly. I forgot how beautiful her smile is, "I still wish I knew about all this sooner."

"Well, if you weren't snuggling it up with your latest squeeze in New York.."

A blush instantly covers her cheeks, "Hey now, I told you I was going there with her for a few weeks. I just didn't plan on having my phone stolen so sorry for not returning any of your calls."

I shoot one of my famous smirks her way, "I know. I'm just playing around with you. I didn't want to tell you over the phone anyway." a beat, "So, am I ever going to meet this girl?"

"Yes", she says with a nervous smile, "Just don't plan on it anytime soon."

"And why not?"

"Because I don't want you to scare her off."

"For the millionth time, I'm. Not. Going. To. Scare. Her. Off."

A deadpan, "Bella I know how you can get. I've seen what your jealousy can do first hand."

Right when I opened my mouth to argue, even though I would clearly lose, my phone started to ring:

"Hey, baby. Uhhhh surrrre I'll be there soon. Kay. Love you too. Bye.", I placed my cell back into my jean pocket. "That was Alice."

"Duh", she states blankly with a joking grin. "Is she okay?"

"Yea. She said she's on her way home from shopping with Rosalie." a pause" which means she needs me there to take her bags out the car."

Ashley laughs at my horror struck face, "Is it going to be that bad?"

"When Alice gets done shopping with Rosalie, it looks like they robbed the fucking mall. And when I say rob I mean the entire mall needs to restock."

"Ooooooh. I'm sorry.", she winces, "I think Alice needs a new shopping partner."

"Rosalie is clearly a bad example."

..............

When I pulled into the driveway to our apartment, it wasn't Alice's car parked in the other spot like I expected.

"Edward. What are you doing here?", I ask while shutting the truck door. "Not that I'm not happy to see you."

His charming smile turns into a smirk that almost beats mine. Almost., "Just came by to talk."

"Oh cool. Well come on in. I'm sure Alice will be home soon with tons of shopping bags that I know you find so fun to carry in."

"I think I'll pass.", he chuckles while leaning off his Volvo as I walk closer to him, "I can't stay long anyway. I'm meeting Jacob later." a pause "I just wanted to tell you that if there's anything you or Alice need, let me know. I'll help anyway I can."

"Yet you wont suffer with me when Alice comes home."

"Now _that_ is where I draw the line." he laughs, "But if there's anything else..."

"I know.", I nod with a warm smile. "You're a great guy, Ed."

"Well I better go. I'll see you later, Bella."

I wave as he pulls out the drive. I know sometime in the future I'm going to ask him a huge favor. When Alice and I are ready. I've had this idea swimming around for over 2 weeks now, I just hope she feels the same way I do about it and that Edward is willing to help...

My cell starts to vibrate:

**FROM: Edward**

**"Just passed Alice she'll be pulling up soon. Remember to bend with your knees ;) Haha."**

A groan, "Why didn't he just run me over?"

* * *

**I know. It's really short :/ but it's something!**

**And I would love it so much if you would review. It would really lift my spirit :) And thanks for reading.  
**


	20. A Gift

**Holy smurf I am on a tiny ROLL! Thanks to those of you that reviewed the last chapter. It's good to know I still have readers. And I can't believe the amount of story and author alerts and favorites I get. It's insane!**

**I'm so happy that I'm able to get another chapter out at a decent time *pats self on the back***

**So heeerrrrreeeee you go! I hope you like it ;)**

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"So, Alice's birthday is comin' up on us pretty quickly. Have you made any plans yet?"

I look away from the tv and over to Emmett with a quizzical expression, "Did I say I had planned birthday plans?"

"Noooo but the big day _is_ in like 4 days. Don't you think you should get that party planning part of your brain reeving it's engine?"

Deadpan, "I'm missing that part of my brain."

"Yea along with a few other important lobes.", he mumbles more to himself but I was still able to hear it.

I hit pause on the video game we're currently playing and turn my body half way to the side so I can give him a good glare, "Oh you're a fine one to talk."

"I know I'm fine.", he states with a cocky yet playful smirk, "But that's not what we're talking about right now."

"I was under the impression Rosalie was going to plan this whole thing!", my foot starts to bounce a little as nerves start to bubble inside. How the hell am I suppose to throw a birthday party?, "Emmett, I-I can't plan things! Things never go as planned with me! THAT'S WHY I DON'T PLAN THEM!"

"Whoa, whoa Bells, calm down!", he chuckles while holding his palms up like I'm about to attack. Huh, when did I get off the couch?, "Bella, just sit back down. I was joking. Rosalie _is_ planning the party. Actually I'm pretty sure she has everything ready so I should say _planned_."

"Really? You're joking?", I ask him as I push the hair out of my face from when I jumped up. When he nods his head yes I let out a breath of relief. Phew, I dodged that bullet. Wait a sec.. "You thought getting me all worked up like that was funny? Em, you're such an ass!"

"You should have seen your face though! You looked all crazed it was great." He laughs while doing his best attempt to make my 'crazed face'.

"Suck my dick dude.", I chuckle while flipping him off.

"You don't have one to suck! - and, and even if you did I soooo wouldn't suck it.. not ever. EVER.", I smile in satisfaction as I watch him stumble over his words like the big moron he is, "I mean it Bella not even a lick."

I walk out the living room with a giant smirk, looking over my shoulder to add, "You couldn't handle my dick anyway."

Knowing he can never back down from a challenge he replies with, "I so could!", realizing he's just digging himself into a deeper hole his face turns bright red, "I didn't mean- what I meant to say was.. You know I'm not!-"

"It's ok buddy. Your secret is safe with me", I whisper with a wink before walking into the kitchen where Alice is.

I laugh when I hear Emmett groan in frustration, still trying to get his point across to the empty room.

"Haaaaa there was no part of that that wasn't fun."

"Did you say something, babe?", Alice asks when I enter.

"I was just giving your brother a hard time.", I tell her with a mischievous grin before coming up behind her and giving her a soft kiss. She giggles when I leave butterfly kisses all along her neck. I hold onto her tighter when she tries to escape.

"Bella! I'm trying to cook! And your very distracting."

"And you _love _it when I distract you.", I whisper seductively into her ear while one of my hand takes the wooden spoon from hers and setting it on the table as the other travels down her stomach. A tiny gasp falls from her lips when I dip my hand under the waist band of her shorts, barely grazing her freshly shaved tasty area.

"Ya know, you haven't told me what you wanted for you birthday yet.", I smirk when she starts whimpering as my fingers dance along her slit.

"Bella.", she sighs. God how I love when she says my name like that. I groan when she slowly grinds her ass into my front. Some of the utensils on the counter fall to the floor as I push flush against her, wanting to mold my front into her back.

"Babe do you know how much I love your ass.", I moan as my roaming fingers that are in her panties rub rough against her pussy. "Now, tell me what you want."

I listen to her low moans and deep breathing as I wait for her answer, also enjoying the feel of her wetness starting to coat my slender fingers.

"I-.."

"Alice are you done in here yet", the sound of Esme's voice approaching the kitchen quickly pulls me and Alice out of our very inappropriate position. Not gracefully I might add. I yank my hand out of her pants as I spin to the left to lean against the bar(Knocking over more stuff in the process), trying my hardest to look casual right when Esme enters the room.

"Uhhhh not yet mom.", Alice answers with a voice that was way too high pitched even for her while grabbing her spoon, quickly stirring whatever is in the bowl in front of her.

"Hey Esme", I greet while looking over to Alice so I don't have to look her mother in the face. Cause I just know it says _'I JUST HAD MY HAND DOWN YOUR DAUGHTERS PANTS!'_

Alice gives me a sheepish smile and I notice... half her vagina is showing. Really Alice? REALLY?

"Shorts", I mouth to her while Esme searches the cabinets for something just a few feet away. Alice's nose scrunches up in confusion and mouths back "What?"

"SHORTS", I cough out while placing my hand over my mouth for more effect. She finally catches my drift and looks down then back up in a flash with wide eyes and mouths, "OH MY GOD"

My gaze snaps over to Esme when I hear her closing the cabinets, turning back around to face us right after Alice gets herself all straightened out FINALLY. I swear if we get out of this without her mom knowing I'm so giving Alice hell for how clueless she was about her girly parts just flashing around...

"I could've sworn I had bought- Bella, what's on your hand dear?" Oooooh fuck. GULP. My eyes slowly look down to the hand cupping my nose and mouth and of course it's the infamous hand that got us into all this awkwardness. And it's sticky with Alice juice.

Spectacular.

I put my digits into my mouth and suck them each clean while saying, "Just wanted to steal a taste of what Alice was making."

"Yea she just couldn't wait.", Alice adds with chuckle.

Esme's eyebrows knit together, "Oh, well don't do it again sweetie. There's raw eggs in there."

"Yes ma'am. No more dipping.", I smile while giving her a thumbs up. I can see Alice from the corner of my eye looking at me like, _"You are so retarded"_

"Oh holy fucking shit on a shingle that was close.", Alice says in one quick breath after Esme leaves the kitchen.

A shrug, "I thought it went well.", I turn to Alice, "Next time remember to pull your pants up."

"Next time keep your hands out my pants!"

I scoff dramatically as I turn to leave, "Fine!"

"WAIT! BELLA I WAS JOKING!"

* * *

When Rosalie arrived later that afternoon for dinner I had asked her if what Emmett said was really true. If Rosalie really did have Alice's party under control and bless her soul she did. All I have to worry about is getting Alice's gift and I already know what I'm going to get her. I've thought about this for months and I know it's what I want to get her.... I've known for years actually.

"Bella are you okay baby?", Alice asks. Honestly, my nerves are killing me. But I can't tell her that. It will ruin the surprise.

"Yea I'm fine."

she smiles and leans up to give me a quick peck on the lips then returns her head to my lap.

"I love you." I can't help but smile when she randomly tells me she loves me. It warms me from head to toe

"Love you too babe."

"Play with my hair." she orders sweetly.

"Okay", I giggle while massaging my fingers through her soft, black hair.

"Mmmmm.", she hums out, completely at ease as her eyes flutter shut. Her beauty always amazes me. It's the little moments like this that makes me forget about all the bad shit. Us just relaxing on the couch with the lights off watching tv is a precious moment of peace.

I use the glow of the tv to watch her face as she stares at the screen, watching a cute little girl with pig tails running from the water that's splashing on the shore and into her mothers arms. Something flashes across Alice's face. A longing, a wanting.....

"That could have been us.", she says softly, not taking her eyes off the television.

Now is the best time to bring up_ one_ thing that needs to be discussed...

"It still can be us, Alice."

I watch as her eyes flicker in thought.

"What are you saying?", she asks slowly while sitting up to face me.

"I've given it some thought, a lot of thought actually, about- about our future. About what we could have together. Alice, I love you." a pause, "... and in our future I see a family."

Her eyes are glistening with tears as she smiles brightly, "Bella are you asking me what I think you're asking me?"

I lick my lips while swallowing down a lump in my throat, "Would you like to have a baby?" Her answer is given to me in the form of a tackling hug that nearly knocks us both off the couch. Her lips hungrily attach themselves to mine.

"Thank you!", she cries out through kisses, "Bella I love you so damn much."

"I love you too angel.", I whisper before meeting her for another passionate kiss.

* * *

"Do you really think Edward is going to agree to something like this?"

"I don't know. That's why were taking him out to dinner. Ya know, kinda butter him up.", I glance over to her and she nods.

"But really what do we say, _"Hey Edward have a roll, oh! and can we have your sperm?"_"

"Of course not.", I snort and then frown, "I wish we could be that up front about it."

"Name?", The hostess asks with a smile when we reach the podium.

"Swan.",

She looks down at her list, "Ah, Bella Swan here you are. Right this way please."

We follow her through the restaurant and to a comfortable booth in the corner. It costs a little more since it's a little more private than the other tables but hey, we're gonna need it tonight.

"Oh and we're expecting one more person, Edward Masen"

"When he arrives I'll send him your way."

"Thank you."

The hostess returns the smile I sent her way and walks back to where she's needed.

"Bella this place is so nice. I didn't even think you could find a place like this in Forks.", she whispers while examining all the different forks and spoons on the table.

A chuckle, "Well we almost didn't find it thanks to you and your _wonderful_ map skills", a pause, "And hello, this isn't a library. You can speak up."

She rolls her eyes and sticks out her tongue. She can be so adorably childish.

"Oh, you look stunning tonight by the way.", I tell her while smiling. Since there's a dress code for this place she wore an elegant black dress with a plunging neck line and I'm practically drooling while looking over her beautiful creamy pale skin.

A smile plays at the corner of her beautiful red lips as she looks down, avoiding my gaze. I love how easily I can get her to blush.

"You look amazing yourself.", she replies softly when her eyes return to mine and they're filled to the rim with lust. Ooooh yeaaaa I am SO getting laid tonight!, "Red looks great on you, Bella."

"I know.", I smirk. I decided on a black pencil skirt and a silky red top that fits like a second skin. And it's something I just bought for tonight because when do I ever dress up like this?

"Good evening ladies."

Alice and I smile brightly at Edward when he settles into the booth with us. Looking very handsome in black slacks and a deep blue buttoned shirt.

"I get to have dinner with two beautiful women. Can you imagine what the other guests are thinking?"

"They probably think we're your high class whores and you're our sugar daddy.", Alice answers cutely while wiggling her eyebrows.

"Too bad we're all gay.", I add and we all share a laugh.

After a little more small talk and a few rounds of champagne while we wait for our food, Edward finally asks what I thought he would ask sooner...

"I'm very happy you asked me out to join you two, but we could have went to any old restaurant to have a good time. Why _The Chandeleur_?" a pause, "and not meaning to be nosey but, how can you afford a place like this? You still don't have a job what, are you selling drugs?", his eyes narrow as he points an accusing finger at me, "It's not drugs is it Bella?"

Alice and I giggle at Edward's expression, "I got my bartending job back, Edward. I went in there yesterday expecting I would have to beg and kiss my boss's ass but as soon as he saw me he begged _me_ to come back. He said the place was shit without me."

Edward glances from me to Alice and back to me, "So are you selling drugs on the side? Because we still wouldn't be sitting here on a bartender's income."

"NO there are no drugs!", I look around the restaurant when I realized how loud I said that, some people were staring at me. I force a smile and then turn back to Edward and repeat at a lower volume, "No there are no drugs! Remember that night I sang with _Dude, Where's My Guitar?_ Well, they were playing when I went to the bar to beg for my job back, and Dean told me again how much he appreciated that I saved their asses, so he gave me a check."

"A check?"

I nod with a big grin on my face.

"A damn good one.", Alice chimes in with her own grin.

Edward laughs, "Good. Then I refuse to feel bad for ordering the steak and lobster." a pause, "now, what is it that you need to ask me?"

I take one swig of champagne for courage as Alice squeezes my free hand. I send a smile her way and then focus my attention back to Edward, "The other day when you said if there was anything we needed.."

"And I meant it.", he nods.

"Well, this is a _big_ anything."

"It's fine Bella. What is it?"

"I mean it this is like, a HUGE favor."

"Just ask me."

"The macho of all favors."

"Bella..."

"The king of favors."

"WE WANT YOUR SPERM!", Alice blurts out, clearly out of patience. The sound of forks hitting plates and gasps are heard through out the restaurant as all 3 of us in unison turn our heads to face them aaannnnd at the same time each of us turn back. My hand covers my eyes in horror and embarrassment as the people return their attention back to their food.

"Ooooh my god.", I whisper to myself and then whisper-yell to Alice, "What did I say about being so forward?"

"Well you wouldn't spit it out!", she whisper-yells back.

I sigh heavily and look to Edward, "I'm so sorry. We shouldn't have-"

"I'll do it."

"You- you'll do it?"

"Bella when I said I would do anything to help you and Alice I meant it. I also considered this as something that would cross your mind.", he smiles proudly, "and I'm honored that you would ask me."

That's it. It's official. Edward Anthony Masen is an Angel sent from Heaven. I blink away a few tears as Edward and I continue to smile at one another.

"Th-thank you.", I tell him so softly that if he didn't nod in response I wouldn't think he heard me. I pull Alice into a hug as we both cry while giggling happily.

"I love you Edward.", Alice squeals while scooting closer to him and wrapping her arms around his neck.

"I love you to. Both of you."

"Really Edward, you're a gentleman in a land of douche bags."

"Thanks Bella.", he chuckles

Now I really believe a door is finally opening for Alice and I....

It's finally our time.

* * *

_***THE NEXT DAY***_

"Is there anywhere else you wanted to look before we leave?", Rosalie asks as she slings another shopping bag over her shoulder.

Deadpan, "Do I even need to justify that question with an answer?"

"Oh come on! We needed a girls day. It's been forever since we've hung out when it's been just the two of us."

"Did girls day have to be _all day_ at the mall?"

"Duh", she answers before taking another sip out of her Big Gulp. "I heard through the grape vine that you, Alice, and Edward went out to eat last night. What was that all about?"

Oh yea. We decided not to tell anyone until Alice goes through the whole procedure thing and we know for sure she's pregnant. "No reason.", I shrug while looking briefly into the stores we pass while walking .

"Then why didn't you invite the whole gang? It could've been fun."

"We just wanted to-", I stop dead in my tracks when I come face to face with a certain store that holds Alice's birthday gift. The gift I can finally afford to give her. The gift that I've imagined getting her for years....

The gift that will make everything complete with just one simple answer....

When Rosalie sees the store I'm eyeing she smiles and raises a perfect brow, "Are you ready to go for it?"

I look into her eyes with a big smile and nod my head towards _Kay Jewelers_, "Lets do it."

She squeals while clapping her hands excitedly and drags me in...

* * *

**Sooooooo what did you think? ;) *squeals* I'm still so damn happy I got a chapter out so fast! haha**

**Review and let me know what's on your mind!**


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